Showing posts with label Tim. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Tim. Show all posts

Sunday, November 1, 2015

On Photography - Past, Present and Future - Joel Meyerowitz (Tue 27 Oct 2015)

School Holidays - Camera in Hand - Canberra (late 1960's)

Joel Meyerowitz on Photography and the Past, Present and Future :

We can never imagine the work we might make in the future – that’s part of the wonder of all art making – but when we are in the present and can look back, as I can, over 50 years of work, there seems to be a continuous path that unwinds in a way that sometimes seems inevitable.
via A Full House by Joel Meyerowitz.

Saturday, October 17, 2015

On Deciding - Lisa Gorman / Annette O’Brien (Fri 16 Oct 2015)

[l-r]Grandpa, Baby Eric, Lindy, Lynn, Baby Judy, Geoff with camera in hand (was afflicted even back then), Tim - Chifley / Canberra (Jan 1970)

Lisa Gorman on Deciding:

if you worry too much about your decisions, you won’t actually get anything done
via Extraordinary Routines • Lisa Gorman by Annette O’Brien.

Can be seen as a bit of a fence sitter (or a dreamer, as the photo shows me looking skywards), as I can often see (or at least consider) all the sides of a decision. Along with an inherent desire to see everyone happy (a fatal flaw I am trying to correct), it is often tough to make a decision, even when I know what I want or what is best.

Friday, June 5, 2015

On Despair - I Wrote this for You / Iain S. Thomas (Mon 30 Jul 2012)

Self Portrait - Despair - Jerrabomberra Creek / Canberra (Sat 12 Mar 2005)

Iain S. Thomas on Despair:

Appreciate every moment of happiness and remember it when you despair. Hold them close. And when you are happy, remember the moments of despair and think to yourself, "I told you so."

The First Day On Earth by Iain S. Thomas.

Before Tim did what he did, I'm pretty sure I did not know what Despair meant. When we left Canberra the day after we said Goodbye, we went to the place he decided to leave us. When I took this photo of myself, this is when I finally understood what Despair meant - it's written all across my face. And more importantly, I found out what it felt. A hard way to learn the meaning of a word. This is Life and we take from it what we can to make us stronger and more resilient.

Saturday, March 7, 2015

Remembering Tim - Norwood Park Crematorium / Canberra (Fri 11 Mar 2005)

Tim (my Brother) and Tom (my Dad) - Norwood Park Crematorium / Canberra (Fri 27 Feb 2015)

Today, 10 years on, we Remember Tim:

Timothy Francis Eldridge was born on Wednesday 4 December 1963 in Tamworth NSW. He became the third and youngest child of Thomas and Betty. He had an elder sister, Lynn, spelt with two n's not one as Tim persisted throughout his whole life). Lynn was two years older than Tim. Myself, Geoff being 3 years older was the eldest. His father was an electrical engineer with the Electricity Commision of NSW. The Regional Centre was based in Tamworth and from this office the electricity transmission system in northern NSW grew. The nature of his Father's work often required nights away from home. We all looked forward to Dad's return on Friday Night with a bag of mixed lollies for all.

Lynn and I found as oursleves at school and this gave Tim two years at home with Mum by himself. Mum tells me now that he spent this time playing with the kids across the road. Even at this early age Tim was making friends. I seem to recall also that Tim managed to get a 1/2 day of pre-school (a first in the family). I always felt that this small period with other new kids gave Tim a nice head start when he commenced his schooling at South Tamworth Primary. He was well adjusted for the rigours of school, made friends easily (he was always going to birthday parties) and was a natural at anything he put his mind to.

He started in the top class in Kindy and there he stayed each year through his primary school days (and subsequent educational endeavours). Tim was a also a natural athlete and started playing rugby league at he age of eight, moving quickly onto soccer and then finally hockey (all in one year .. maybe this was a sign of things to come). He played representative hockey for Tamworth at the state champships every June Long Weekend. I even recall him playing under 12 hockey at Lismore when he was only 9. He was a prodigy even then. He also represented the North Western NSW primary school team in Murwullumbah where his team came back as state champions. Another little publicised sporting achievement was middle distance running and I remember him running a low 2 minute 800 meters at the Tamworth Primary Schools Athletic Carnival. A record that was not broken for many years.

The year Tim finished his primary school saw the Eldridge family move from Tamworth to Wagga for Dad's work. This was a tough time for everyone but we all adapted to new environs and our new high school in Wagga called Kooringal High. It was a new school and much smaller than the high school Lynn and I left in Tamworth. Probably 1/4 the size in students and was so new that it did not even have a sixth form in our first year there. Tim as always fitted in very quickily and he found new friends almost instantly. Many of whom are here today.

By the time Tim reached Wagga he had found the game of golf and before long he was swinging a set of clubs out at the Wagga Country Club, across the lake from where we lived. Here he spent many hours fine tuning his tee shots, fairway shots, chips and putts (or spits as his young nephew would subsequently refer, many years later). Golf was to become a life long passion and this was something which always stayed with him. It was only his 94 year old grandfather who thought something was wrong four weeks ago when he percieved Tim had lost interest in his Golf.

Tim breezed through high school and obtained excellent grades with little effort. In his final year he was nominated as perfect (whooops I meant "a prefect") and was voted school vice captain by his peers. For his HSC he studied a couple of hours each night on the floor in front of the TV. To recover from this strenous study regime, he would spend the next day playing 36 holes of golf.

With his HSC behind him Tim entered the University of Sydney and worked his way towards a Civil Engineering degree over a four year period. The first two years of his course, Tim lived at Wesley College, a residential college on the grounds of Sydney University. Here, Tim, along with some of high school buddies quickily adapted to the demanding University life style. Days at the beach, missing lectures, drinking beer, etc. He found new friends quickily and again many are here today. The nucleaus of this group were quickily dubbed the "DAMAGE BOYS" because of the drinking reputation at College Victory Dinners, formals and other ramdon gatherings.

Mid way through his second year, Tim's father Thomas passed away suddenly at the early age of 47 after a sunday afternoon hockey match. It was my job to tell Tim the news that Sunday night. I now remember his numb response to my news. "Where has he gone?" he asked. His fathers death at such a young age for all of us was a defining moment in Tim's life (probably the most defining moment up until last Saturday). It was a difficult time for Tim and the Family. Initially he seemed to cope well, but the next year saw Tim arrive home to Wagga unannounced many times during the university terms. I guess the one lesson (or theory actually I would call it a LAW) Tim would give us today from all this would be to grieve properly, seek support from Family, Friends and professionals and to address the difficult issues these tramatic events have on the fragile human soul.

Anyway, back to Uni, Tim bravely persisted and graduated with honours at the end of 1985. His brief but eventful civil engineering career started with a small but prestigous Civil Engineering Consultating companycalled Wargon, Chapman and Partners. Mr Wargon, a famous Amercican civil engineer appeared to take Tim under his wing and Tim quickily found himself designing car parks, and tall buildings. As well as doing one-off type jobs such as a structural integrity report of the Channel 9 Transmitter Antenna at the Channel 9 Compound, and preliminary designs for the now Sydney Harbour Tunnel.

Tim quickily realised that Civil Engineering was not for him (however a recent rush of activity with home decks shows there was some latent interest in at least some things civil). On the fifth redesign for an Alan Bond tower on the old Waltons site across from the Sydney Town Hall, Tim decided to move on. This gave him the chance to travel for 3 months overseas which took him to many places in Europe, England, particularly London and even India (if I recall correctly).

London was a place to which Tim would return frequently over the rest of his life, the last being July/August last year. The drawcards to London were friends and another life passion I have not yet mentioned, English Football. His favourite team during his schools days was Queens Park Rangers. Though his interested waned when their goalie Phil Parkes defected to my team West Ham in 1977 for a then world record sum of 565,000 pounds. Subsequent years and more recently Tim has been an Arsenal supporter.

On his return in the late 80's Tim persued his ambition for a new career. In this pursuit he found himself in Canberra studying part-time for a degree in Information Systems at the then Canberra College of Advanced Education and working part-time for small scientific software consulting firms. One system I remember was a flight simiulator program driven by data from aircraft black-box recorders.

On graduation from the CCAE Tim started work at Customs and then Department of Veterans Affairs for a record three years. Towards the end of this stint in DVA, Tim bought his house in Griffith, just up from Marnucka. He lived in the house briefly before deciding that a six month stint in Los Angles working on a Telon Related Inventory system was the go. On his return he decided to work in Sydney and here he had stints at NRMA and Westpac. Weekends saw Tim travelling back to his home in Canberra to catch up with friends and to play golf amongst other things. This became too tiring and before long he was back in Canberra fulltime working at the Australian Tax Office and subsequently Customs. His crowning software achievement was an ATO case-actioning tool which I believed was to be a distillation of systems and processes from the many places he had worked.

More recently, Tim returned to DVA where he ventured into web-based systems using packages such as Websphere and Tomcat.

Wherever Tim worked, he took the roles on seriously. He appeared to very much love a process and a set of rules to capture and implement. He believed rules were meant not to be broken (contrary to the majority of the population) and I always thought that he was perfect fit for the ATO. [He had a great sense of what was right and doing it right].

Another constant in Tim's life were his friends and I will always remember his 40th birthday speech where he said the party was not to celebrate his 40th, but more importantly, a chance for his family and friends to get together.

There is so much more to be said. We all have our memories of Tim and I ask you for just one moment to reflect on the good times you had with him ... and to take this forward with you through the tough times ahead.

It is now time to say goodbye to a loving son, brother, grandson, nephew, uncle, friend and colleague. We now know that Tim struggled with a delibertating and destructive illness which he held undercover for many years. I ask you to take the time to consider the strength he showed under this enormous pressure and to admire him for how he lived a relatively normal and happy life, shared with friends and family.

In the end Tim ran out "Puff" as he said and found peace from his illness the only way he knew how. Please forgive him. He asked for this.

Tim, you asked me where Dad had gone. We know that you searched for him high and low. We also now know that you have found him. The search and struggle is complete and that you have found your peace.

You will always have a special place in our hearts and memories. We will miss you.

Love .. Mum, Lynn and Geoff ..

Saturday, March 8, 2014

Same Same but Different - Jason Kottke (Sat 08 Mar 2014)

Space Needle - Seattle Center (Sun 10 Apr 2014)

Jason Kottke (*) writes:
Everything was the same as it was before, except that everything was different. Does that make sense?
via When Kurt met Courtney (*) by Jason Kottke (*).

I flew into Seattle from Sydney on the day that Kurt Cobain's (*) body was found in the loft of his Garage on the shores of Lake Washington. The first I heard of the sad news was on the radio when I woke the next morning in my room of the Seattle Youth Hostel I was staying.

I would wander the streets of Seattle and ride a bike along the shores of Lake Washington the next few days randomly viewing the sights as I have always done. I even attended an impromptu memorial for Kurt Cobain at the Seattle Center a day later. I did not know about it but just stumbled upon it at the early stages.

It was eventful few days in Seattle, I was at the Boeing Production Site in nearby Everett to witness the maiden test flight of a Boeing 777 in the colours of El Al Airlines. To finish it off I would watch a game of Basketball in the same Stadium as Bill Gates. I would almost walk into him as we all the left the Stadium post game, and I mean literal walk into him :-).

I had forgotten about all of this until I read the few words above at kottke.org

Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Sky - Lake George (Thu 04 Dec 2003)

Sky - Lake George (Thu 04 Dec 2003)

10 years goes quick and a lot changes along the way.

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Dr Ray Seidler - Kings Cross Clinic / Sydney (Mon 21 Dec 2009)

Dr Raymond Seidler - Kings Cross Clinic (*) / Sydney (Mon 21 Dec 2009)

Today I was saddened to learn of the unexpected death (*) of Dr Raymond Seidler (*) on Thu 25 Jul 2013. He was 61 years old and always looked 15 years younger, no matter his age.

Ray was my GP for 24 years and was always there for me. I loved the diversity of his practice and patients, and he helped me through some challenging times in my life as well as all the little things that require the hand and advice of a Doctor.

We shared an interest in photography and he always had a few moments to talk about the latest digital camera and for us to view a few of the others photos on his desktop computer on his surgery desk.

His father was a professional photographer and Ray had a glass display cabinet full of old cameras in his surgery.

The camera shown above was his Father's. He picked this camera to show me, as he was touched by the hand written notes, made by his Father, on the inside of the camera case (just below his right hand). The notes related to reminders about exposure correction details, I seem to recall. He was more than happy to pose for this photograph.

He was also an earlier adopter of the latest gadget or technology and was a prolific writer (*) and commentator on a diverse range of issues.

I will miss him as my Doctor and as a person I could trust and confide. My thoughts are with his Family in particular, as well as his Friends and Colleagues.

Thank you Ray.

Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Happy 13th Anniversary

Tim, Jo, Geoff, Jenny, Jenny, David - Cronulla Uniting Church (Sun 30 Apr 2000)

Sunday, January 6, 2013

The View - Malua Bay (Sun 09 Sep 2001)

The View - Malua Bay (Sun 09 Sep 2001)

The view from the back of my Grandparents house at Malua Bay (*). I wrote a little about it here (*).

Spent many a childhood January School Holiday there. It was a long day (10-11 hours) trip from Tamworth to Malua. The three of us would sit in the back seat, with me in the middle to keep the peace.

We could get to the beach (between the two headlands) walking along the cliff line. Also, we could walk down the cliff just to the left of where this photo was taken. This is the view we would get on the way down ..

The View (detail) - Malua Bay (Sun 09 Sep 2001)

Saturday, January 5, 2013

Flowers - Manuka / Canberra (Nov 2002)

Flowers - Manuka / Canberra (Nov 2002)

Some flower photos from Tim's backyard garden. The light was soft and even, and the mighty IXUS did another great job. The bokeh in macro mode is very nice for such a small and early generation digital camera. A few more photos follow ..

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Happy Birthday Tim - Manuka / Canberra (Sat 29 Nov 2003)

Happy Birthday Tim - Manuka / Canberra (Sat 29 Nov 2003)

It was a few days early - his Birthday was the 4 Dec - and all his Family and Friends gathered to celebrate his 40th. Bumped into Michael (he is leaning against the post with the camera) Sunday week ago and I have a photo for here shortly.

Grace and Jenny - Manuka / Canberra (Fri 28 Dec 2003)

Grace and Jenny - Manuka / Canberra (Fri 28 Dec 2003)

Grace and Jenny prepare Tim's 40th Birthday Cake.

Thursday, August 2, 2012

MIT / TIM - Charles River / Back Bay / Boston (Mon 22 Aug 2011)

MIT / TIM - Charles River / Back Bay / Boston (Mon 22 Aug 2011)

Thursday, May 17, 2012

With Erica - Breakfast - Glebe Deli (Thu 17 May 2012)

With Erica (1 of 2) - Breakfast - Glebe Deli (Thu 17 May 2012)

With Erica (2 of 2) - Breakfast - Glebe Deli (Thu 17 May 2012)

Erica is my Aunty and was my Father's younger sister. She lives just outside of Batemans Bay and owns and operates a 2nd Hand Book Store called the Batehaven Book Exchange (*). She is in Sydney for some medical scans and arrived in from Perth yesterday after spending a week with her 3 week old Grandson, Alex.

Not exactly High Tea at the Ritz (where I am constantly reminded that my late younger brother Tim took her) but the Glebe Cafe is my favourite cafe at the moment. Due to the scans, vegemite on white toast and black tea for Erica today. She loves animals and books, and tells a great story and never forgets a fact or detail. She is the Family Historian on my Father's side of the Family.

Good Luck with the scans Aunty Erica.

New series, titled and labelled With (*), of portrait photos of family and friends as I sit across from them at local cafes and restaurants. Will try to use my Canon S95 with available light.

Thursday, December 8, 2011

What I think about when I think by the side of the River Charles - Boston (Mon 22 Aug 2011)

Jogging Path (1 of 5) - Charles River / Boston (Mon 22 Aug 2011)

Jogging Path (2 of 5) - Charles River / Boston (Mon 22 Aug 2011)


Jogging Path (3 of 5) - Charles River / Boston (Mon 22 Aug 2011)

Jogging Path (4 of 5) - Charles River / Boston (Mon 22 Aug 2011)

On a whim, I recently bought myself a copy of Haruki Murakami's (*) book, What I Talk About When I Talk About Running (*). As I read it, I was quite taken by the following passage ..
It's been 10 years since I lived in Cambridge [Boston]. When I saw the Charles River again, a desire to run swept over me. Generally, unless some change takes place, rivers always look the same, and the Charles River in particular looked totally unchanged. Time had passed, students had come and gone, I'd aged ten years, and there'd literally been a lot of water under the bridge. But the river has remained unaltered. The water still flows swiftly, and silently, toward Boston Harbour. The water soaks the shoreline, making the grasses grow thick [..]

Maybe because it's the home of the Boston Marathon, Cambridge is full of runners. The jogging path along the Charles goes on forever, and if you wanted to you could run for hours. The problem is, it's used by cyclists, so you have to watch out for speeding bikes whizzing past from behind. At various places, too, there are cracks in the pavement you have to make sure you don't trip over, and a couple of long traffic signals you can get stuck at, which can put a kink in your run. Otherwise, it's a wonderful jogging run.
I sat beside the River Charles. It was late afternoon on the last day of our 4 days in Boston. We had arrived on the Friday from a week in New York. Here are a few photos from my time sitting by the River Charles.

We had already been away for a day short of 4 weeks and it would be another 3 weeks before arriving back home. I was enjoying the trip but was thinking a lot about all the changes that had been occurring in my life - I was without a car and I had moved back to Kirrawee while I waited for my house, I had never really planned or contemplated to live in, to become available while I was away. Tried not to think about these things too much from a far, as I had no control over them. Instead, I just sat myself down on a seat bench by the River Charles and tried to think of other things.

I sat there in the beautiful afternoon sun, I thought of many things. I thought of all the other times I had been to Boston, what took me there and what I did while I was there. I also tried to remember who I was and what I was doing in my life around the time of each trip.

September and October 1988 was the first trip, and it would be just under a year before I would meet Jenny for the first time.

I reflected on the two years since Jenny had left us and all the things that happened since that time. In some ways, it was just sitting there by the River Charles, that I finally stopped and had a chance to clear my thoughts and to really think about things.

I had really kept myself busy and distracted since Jenny's passing (*) - it was one way of coping with the enormity of Jenny's loss. In some ways, I was starting to forget things - who I was, the things that we had done and what I thought I was going to do with my life.

As I sat there by the River Charles, I watched the walkers, runners and bicycle riders go past. Their long shadows, created by the late afternoon sun, are what struck me and this is what kept me interested as I captured these photos. I wondered who these people were, what had brought them to Boston and whether one of them was the future creator of the next social media craze.

A couple of rowers set off from near where I sat and I wondered if they were the Winklevii (*) of Facebook fame (*).

MIT / TIM - Charles River / Back Bay / Boston (Mon 22 Aug 2011)

As I sat there I could see tiny sail boats, standup paddle boards and wind surfers. One wind surfer was fairly inexperienced and a more experienced wind surfer went to his aid, if only to provide advice and moral support, in the knowledge of just being there.

The small sailing boats were from MIT, which is just across the River, and it was only when I saw through the transparent sails, that I realised that in reverse, MIT, spells TIM, my late Brother's name - so I thought about him for a little while. He had been to Boston a few times also, so I thought about all the same things for Tim. Maybe he had sat here and pondered some of the same things, 25 years earlier? I also wondered why I had never made the MIT to TIM connection. Or thinking about it now, I think I may have thought about it a long time ago, but maybe I had forgotten remembering the connection.

Have been to Boston four times prior to this trip and I have visited it on each of my trips to the USA. The last time was just over 17 years earlier in April 1994, where I had hoped I might be able to run the Boston Marathon (*).

Now as I sit here and think about the things I thought about by the River Charles in Boston that late afternoon on Mon 22 Aug 2011, I can now see where Haruki Murakami's (*) ran along the side of the same river on the very path he captured in words above and I have captured in the photos on this page. I also now have an appreciation and can imagine where he found part of the inspiration to write What I Talk About When I Talk About Running (*), which I am now reading and enjoying.

That will do for now. Just leave it here.

Jogging Path (5 of 5) - Charles River / Boston (Mon 22 Aug 2011)

A bit of ramble to mark my 700th Post here.

Sunday, July 3, 2011

Going out on a Limb - Tree of Life Review - Paul Byrne (Sat 02 Jul 2011)

Going out on a Limb - Tree of Life Review (click to read) - Paul Byrne (Sat 02 Jul 2011)

This is my Life - just completely blown away by this Movie.

The imagery of Water and Trees. The silent suffering and subsequent loss of a son and brother, a Brother's searching and wandering, the amazing Jessica Chastain - her inner and outer beauty as Mrs O'Brien - her tragic loss, the one a Mother should never have to bear.

Not for everyone and I would not recommend it, unless you have some kind of empathy towards it's themes, until after reading Paul Byrnes review above (it helped me see it in a different way, compared to if I had not read the review).

Audiences will be polarised. During my screening yesterday afternoon, one person stormed out loudly within the first 30 minutes, while most appaulded at the end (the only time I have witnessed this, based on my experience of watching many movies at the Dendy since Jenny left us two years ago). The audience was definitely an older one compared to the usual Dendy audience and I was probably the youngest one there.

Will definitely go again as I fell asleep in a couple of parts (exceptional tired from all the training and early hours commuting), besides I just want to take it all in again.

[Postscript: My 500th Post.]

God's Pallete - A Master Stroke - Tree - Lake Burley Griffin / Canberra (Mon 05 Aug 2002)

Geoff, Jenny and Betty (my Mum) - Off to the 2005 NSW Sport Awards - Jenny had been nominated for the NSW Masters Womens NSW Sports Award Alexandria / Sydney (Tue 15 Feb 2005)

Geoff and Betty - at the same time, 300km away, Tim's world fell apart and we almost lost him them that night, as we would find out later - our world, my Mother's world would change forever, 20 Days Later - Alexandria / Sydney (Tue 15 Feb 2005)

Transition - water - Jerrabomberra Creek / Canberra (Sat 12 Mar 2005)

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Street Band - 1990 New York City Marathon - Brooklyn (Sun 04 Nov 1990)

Street Band - 1990 New York City Marathon - Brooklyn (Sun 04 Nov 1990)

When I ran the New York City Marathon in Nov 1990, I borrowed Tim's small point and shoot film camera (no commercial accessible digital cameras back then) for the trip and ran with it during the Marathon.

This is my favourite photo from the run - I heard and saw the band playing on the side walk, so I just pulled over for a moment and snapped this shot.

You can see the Northern World Trade Centre Tower in the distance on the left of the photo - it is from there I took this photo of the Brooklyn Bridge in Oct 1988.

I love the one lone audience member - the guy in the Blue Shirt. Also the car with the boot/'trunk' open.

Sunday, April 24, 2011

This is Water / This is Water - David Foster Wallace (Sat 21 May 2005)

Transition - water - Jerrabomberra Creek / Canberra - Sat 12 Mar 2005 (picasa)

David Foster Wallace's (w) 2005 Kenyon College Commencement Address (Sat 21 May 2005) begins with this "neat" parable ...
There are these two young fish swimming along, and they happen to meet an older fish swimming the other way, who nods at them and says, "Morning, boys. How’s the water?" And the two young fish swim on for a bit, and then eventually one of them looks over at the other and goes, "What the hell is water?"
He eloborates in the midst of the long and inspiring Address ...
[..] The point of the fish story is merely that the most obvious, important realities are often the ones that are hardest to see and talk about....The fact is that in the day to day trenches of adult existence, banal platitudes can have a life or death importance. [..]
and conlcudes with ...
The capital-T Truth is about life BEFORE death. It is about the real value of a real education, which has almost nothing to do with knowledge, and everything to do with simple awareness; awareness of what is so real and essential, so hidden in plain sight all around us, all the time, that we have to keep reminding ourselves over and over:

This is water.

This is water.
The above photo is the photo that seemed to start my obsession of photographing water in earnest. No need to explain any more than this. Just thought this was a nice way to tie it all together, for me at least.

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Two Photos to Bookend a Life ..

In putting together yesterday's post, I drew on a photo that has Lynn and I sitting together on top of the Lounge in Tamworth. It was taken just before our brother Tim arrived into our lives - he was born in Tamworth in Dec 1963.

In putting together an earlier post about Tim I came across this photo of Lynn and I, at his house in Canberra, on the day after we said goodbye.

Only really made the connection that the two photos put Lynn and I together in a way that I guess Bookend's Tim's Life and our life with him in between.

Nice to have the photos and the memories ..

Lynn and Geoff at Tim's Place - "the day after we said goodbye to Tim" - Griffith / Canberra (Sat 12 Mar 2005)
A Life in between.


Lynn and Geoff - maybe 1963? (but definitely before Tim arrived in Dec 1963) - "Lynn has this photo: one of my earliest memories - sitting on top of the lounge having our photo taken." - Tamworth (picasa)

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

My Brother Tim

It's the terror of knowing
What this world is about
Watching some good friends
Screaming let me out
Pray tomorrow - gets me higher
Pressure on people - people on streets


Under Pressure (*) - David Bowie and Queen

Recently posted a video of Annie Lennox and David Bowie singing Under Pressure at the 1992 The Freddie Mercury Tribute Concert at Wembley Stadium. In the post I included the lyrics as I often can't quite make out what is being sung (which is Okay). On listening to the song, the meaning of the above lines were instantly clear to me.

Today is the 7th of March and this is the day we take as the passing of my younger brother Tim on Mon 7th March 2005.

Sadly, Tim found himself in a position (Under Pressure I guess) where he considered the best option was to take his own life in a lonely spot by the side of Lake Burley Griffin, less than a couple of km's from the centre of Canberra's Parlimentary Circle (and where we will shortly participate for our State and Club at the 2011 AusDBF National Dragon Boat Championships). A remarkably powerful statement to make about how he felt about life.

His sudden death and it's nature had a hugh impact on his Family and his close Friends.

There will be always the question Why?, but that is not really important now. We should look to remembering the time we had with Tim and as well as the relationship we had with him. Remember the good times.

It is important also to acknowledge his silent suffering and the nature of his death (part of the reason for writing this post). Anger and Regrets are futile emotions. For me, the most important thing is understanding and forgiveness, something I asked all to embrace from the very first moments. This is far more productive, particularly when combined with a sense of persistence, determination, courage to live our lives to the full, no matter the circumstances.

How we respond to life's twists and turns shapes who we become. Choose to live life to the full, learn (don't be afraid to make mistakes - lots of them actually - you will learn more that way), and become stronger, wiser and more resilent.

Was planning to write more, but finding it a little difficult to express myself clearly. So what I do in these circumstances, is hand it over to the photos and the memories they contain. Don't have too many actually (he avoided camera's for some reason), but here they are ..

Cheers - Jo, Tim, Geoff, Jenny, David, Jenny - Darook Park / Cronulla (Sun 30 Apr 2000)
Tim and Grace - Coffs Harbour (25 Dec 2000)
Geoff, Jenny, Tim and Jo - Alexandria (18 Nov 2001)
Tim, Thomas and Geoff - Bronte (23 Dec 2001)
Geoff, Mum and Tim - Wagga Wagga (19 Jan 2002)
Tim, Grandpa and Geoff - Malua Bay (07 Dec 2003)
Tim and Aunty Erica (*) - Batehaven Book Exchange / Batehaven - (07 Dec 2003)
Mum, Tim (London Bound) and Lynn - You must be somewhere in London - Sydney International Airport (01 Jul 2004)
Mum, Tim (London Bound) and Geoff - You must be somewhere in London - Sydney International Airport (01 Jul 2004)
Photo Poster 1 for Tim's Get Together - Griffith / Canberra (Sat 12 Mar 2005)
Photo Poster 2 for Tim's Get Together - Griffith / Canberra (Sat 12 Mar 2005)
Photo Poster 3 for Tim's Get Together - Griffith / Canberra (Sat 12 Mar 2005)
"Despair" - Canberra (Sat 12 Mar 2005) )

Together Again

One year later I would place the Ashes of Tim and my Father at Canberra's Norwood Crematorium. I had my Father's Ashes moved from Wagga Wagga (another story in itself). Jenny, Jo, Lynn and Erica were there also. Tim travelled a lot and my Aunt always said that he was searching for his Father. After all his searching I could now say to her that they were together again.

Tim and Tom - Norwood Park / Canberra (Fri 10 Mar 2006)
Jenny, Geoff, Jo and Lynn - Norwood Park / Canberra (Fri 10 Mar 2006)
Jenny, Geoff and Joanne - Norwood Park / Canberra (Fri 10 Mar 2006)
Tim and Tom - Norwood Park / Canberra (Fri 10 Mar 2006)
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A tree overlooking them .. - Norwood Park / Canberra (Fri 10 Mar 2006)