Nothing Really Matters - Eileen Cady / Footprints on the Path

Words of Wisdom from Janice's Fridge Door - Ashfield (Sun 15 Mar 2015)

.. "nothing really matters" .. by Eileen Cady

Dwell not in the past,
Use it to illustrate a point;
then leave it behind.
nothing
really
matters
except what you do now
In this instant of time.

From this moment onward
you can be entirely different person
filled with love and understanding,
ready with an outstretched hand,
uplifted and positive
in every thought and deed.

Eileen Caddy / Footprints on the Path

Recently had an experience that has forced me to reflect on life more than I normally would.

I recently had to abstract my experience down to a txt message, so someone could appreciate and understand what I went through during and after this experience. Here it is:

I saw the generosity, concern and empathy of complete strangers. I saw first hand the diversity, strength and professionalism of our Rescue Services - I'm in awe of them. I saw the importance of life and how fragile our connection is with it.

I'm proud of my decisions and my actions that day, I think it helped save someones life.

Due to circumstance and/or privacy laws, it is not possible to thank all those people who helped that day, so I say it here - THANK YOU.

An experience like that makes you reflect a lot and in some ways it was life changing - a spiritual experience actually.

I have dwelt on this for far too long and it has had a bigger impact (both negative and positive, oddly enough) on me than I could ever imagined.

It is now time to acknowledge that it did happen for the first and last time here. And it is also now time to leave it behind. Let it go!!!

And so that is that.

Coffs Harbour Bound : Heading Home - Kurnell / Kamay Botany Bay National Park (Mon 16 Mar 2015)

Learning to Fly - Coming Home / Sydney to Coffs Harbour (Mon 16 Mar 2015)

Learning to Fly - Coming Home / Sydney to Coffs Harbour (Mon 16 Mar 2015) - View on YouTube
Back to Coffs Harbour for another week at home with Mum. On a whim I decided to take a few photographs on my iPhone6 to capture the wild ocean as we came in for a landing in Coffs from the North. Decided to put it on video mode and leave it on for the last 4 or 5 minutes. And if it worked out I thought I would add the Foo Fighters Learn to Fly (it takes me back to Sydney 2000) as a soundtrack. In the end, I used the following, which is far more appropriate in spirit and mood. A lovely song. Hope you enjoy it as much as I did putting it all together on the iPhone6 - who would have thought this could all be done on a mobile so easily and effortlessly.

Learning To Fly Lyrics
Tom Petty and The Heartbreakers

Well, I started out down a dirty road
Started out all alone
And the sun went down as I crossed the hill
And the town lit up, the world got still

I'm learning to fly but I ain't got wings
Coming down is the hardest thing

Well, the good ol' days may not return
And the rocks might melt and the sea may burn

I'm learning to fly but I ain't got wings
Coming down is the hardest thing

Well, some say life will beat you down
Break your heart, steal your crown
So I've started out for God knows where
I guess I'll know when I get there

I'm learning to fly around the clouds
But what goes up must come down

I'm learning to fly but I ain't got wings
Coming down is the hardest thing
I'm learning to fly around the clouds
But what goes up must come down

I'm learning to fly
I'm learning to fly

Coffs Harbour landing from the North - Diggers Beach and Park Beach / Coffs Habour (Mon 16 Mar 2015)

Remembering Tim - Norwood Park Crematorium / Canberra (Fri 11 Mar 2005)

Tim (my Brother) and Tom (my Dad) - Norwood Park Crematorium / Canberra (Fri 27 Feb 2015)

Today, 10 years on, we Remember Tim:

Timothy Francis Eldridge was born on Wednesday 4 December 1963 in Tamworth NSW. He became the third and youngest child of Thomas and Betty. He had an elder sister, Lynn, spelt with two n's not one as Tim persisted throughout his whole life). Lynn was two years older than Tim. Myself, Geoff being 3 years older was the eldest. His father was an electrical engineer with the Electricity Commision of NSW. The Regional Centre was based in Tamworth and from this office the electricity transmission system in northern NSW grew. The nature of his Father's work often required nights away from home. We all looked forward to Dad's return on Friday Night with a bag of mixed lollies for all.

Lynn and I found as oursleves at school and this gave Tim two years at home with Mum by himself. Mum tells me now that he spent this time playing with the kids across the road. Even at this early age Tim was making friends. I seem to recall also that Tim managed to get a 1/2 day of pre-school (a first in the family). I always felt that this small period with other new kids gave Tim a nice head start when he commenced his schooling at South Tamworth Primary. He was well adjusted for the rigours of school, made friends easily (he was always going to birthday parties) and was a natural at anything he put his mind to.

He started in the top class in Kindy and there he stayed each year through his primary school days (and subsequent educational endeavours). Tim was a also a natural athlete and started playing rugby league at he age of eight, moving quickly onto soccer and then finally hockey (all in one year .. maybe this was a sign of things to come). He played representative hockey for Tamworth at the state champships every June Long Weekend. I even recall him playing under 12 hockey at Lismore when he was only 9. He was a prodigy even then. He also represented the North Western NSW primary school team in Murwullumbah where his team came back as state champions. Another little publicised sporting achievement was middle distance running and I remember him running a low 2 minute 800 meters at the Tamworth Primary Schools Athletic Carnival. A record that was not broken for many years.

The year Tim finished his primary school saw the Eldridge family move from Tamworth to Wagga for Dad's work. This was a tough time for everyone but we all adapted to new environs and our new high school in Wagga called Kooringal High. It was a new school and much smaller than the high school Lynn and I left in Tamworth. Probably 1/4 the size in students and was so new that it did not even have a sixth form in our first year there. Tim as always fitted in very quickily and he found new friends almost instantly. Many of whom are here today.

By the time Tim reached Wagga he had found the game of golf and before long he was swinging a set of clubs out at the Wagga Country Club, across the lake from where we lived. Here he spent many hours fine tuning his tee shots, fairway shots, chips and putts (or spits as his young nephew would subsequently refer, many years later). Golf was to become a life long passion and this was something which always stayed with him. It was only his 94 year old grandfather who thought something was wrong four weeks ago when he percieved Tim had lost interest in his Golf.

Tim breezed through high school and obtained excellent grades with little effort. In his final year he was nominated as perfect (whooops I meant "a prefect") and was voted school vice captain by his peers. For his HSC he studied a couple of hours each night on the floor in front of the TV. To recover from this strenous study regime, he would spend the next day playing 36 holes of golf.

With his HSC behind him Tim entered the University of Sydney and worked his way towards a Civil Engineering degree over a four year period. The first two years of his course, Tim lived at Wesley College, a residential college on the grounds of Sydney University. Here, Tim, along with some of high school buddies quickily adapted to the demanding University life style. Days at the beach, missing lectures, drinking beer, etc. He found new friends quickily and again many are here today. The nucleaus of this group were quickily dubbed the "DAMAGE BOYS" because of the drinking reputation at College Victory Dinners, formals and other ramdon gatherings.

Mid way through his second year, Tim's father Thomas passed away suddenly at the early age of 47 after a sunday afternoon hockey match. It was my job to tell Tim the news that Sunday night. I now remember his numb response to my news. "Where has he gone?" he asked. His fathers death at such a young age for all of us was a defining moment in Tim's life (probably the most defining moment up until last Saturday). It was a difficult time for Tim and the Family. Initially he seemed to cope well, but the next year saw Tim arrive home to Wagga unannounced many times during the university terms. I guess the one lesson (or theory actually I would call it a LAW) Tim would give us today from all this would be to grieve properly, seek support from Family, Friends and professionals and to address the difficult issues these tramatic events have on the fragile human soul.

Anyway, back to Uni, Tim bravely persisted and graduated with honours at the end of 1985. His brief but eventful civil engineering career started with a small but prestigous Civil Engineering Consultating companycalled Wargon, Chapman and Partners. Mr Wargon, a famous Amercican civil engineer appeared to take Tim under his wing and Tim quickily found himself designing car parks, and tall buildings. As well as doing one-off type jobs such as a structural integrity report of the Channel 9 Transmitter Antenna at the Channel 9 Compound, and preliminary designs for the now Sydney Harbour Tunnel.

Tim quickily realised that Civil Engineering was not for him (however a recent rush of activity with home decks shows there was some latent interest in at least some things civil). On the fifth redesign for an Alan Bond tower on the old Waltons site across from the Sydney Town Hall, Tim decided to move on. This gave him the chance to travel for 3 months overseas which took him to many places in Europe, England, particularly London and even India (if I recall correctly).

London was a place to which Tim would return frequently over the rest of his life, the last being July/August last year. The drawcards to London were friends and another life passion I have not yet mentioned, English Football. His favourite team during his schools days was Queens Park Rangers. Though his interested waned when their goalie Phil Parkes defected to my team West Ham in 1977 for a then world record sum of 565,000 pounds. Subsequent years and more recently Tim has been an Arsenal supporter.

On his return in the late 80's Tim persued his ambition for a new career. In this pursuit he found himself in Canberra studying part-time for a degree in Information Systems at the then Canberra College of Advanced Education and working part-time for small scientific software consulting firms. One system I remember was a flight simiulator program driven by data from aircraft black-box recorders.

On graduation from the CCAE Tim started work at Customs and then Department of Veterans Affairs for a record three years. Towards the end of this stint in DVA, Tim bought his house in Griffith, just up from Marnucka. He lived in the house briefly before deciding that a six month stint in Los Angles working on a Telon Related Inventory system was the go. On his return he decided to work in Sydney and here he had stints at NRMA and Westpac. Weekends saw Tim travelling back to his home in Canberra to catch up with friends and to play golf amongst other things. This became too tiring and before long he was back in Canberra fulltime working at the Australian Tax Office and subsequently Customs. His crowning software achievement was an ATO case-actioning tool which I believed was to be a distillation of systems and processes from the many places he had worked.

More recently, Tim returned to DVA where he ventured into web-based systems using packages such as Websphere and Tomcat.

Wherever Tim worked, he took the roles on seriously. He appeared to very much love a process and a set of rules to capture and implement. He believed rules were meant not to be broken (contrary to the majority of the population) and I always thought that he was perfect fit for the ATO. [He had a great sense of what was right and doing it right].

Another constant in Tim's life were his friends and I will always remember his 40th birthday speech where he said the party was not to celebrate his 40th, but more importantly, a chance for his family and friends to get together.

There is so much more to be said. We all have our memories of Tim and I ask you for just one moment to reflect on the good times you had with him ... and to take this forward with you through the tough times ahead.

It is now time to say goodbye to a loving son, brother, grandson, nephew, uncle, friend and colleague. We now know that Tim struggled with a delibertating and destructive illness which he held undercover for many years. I ask you to take the time to consider the strength he showed under this enormous pressure and to admire him for how he lived a relatively normal and happy life, shared with friends and family.

In the end Tim ran out "Puff" as he said and found peace from his illness the only way he knew how. Please forgive him. He asked for this.

Tim, you asked me where Dad had gone. We know that you searched for him high and low. We also now know that you have found him. The search and struggle is complete and that you have found your peace.

You will always have a special place in our hearts and memories. We will miss you.

Love .. Mum, Lynn and Geoff ..

On How to Get There - Yesterday's Suffering, Today's Inspiration, Tomorrow's Strength

God Still Loves You!!! I Love You, Also - Valletta / Malta (Sat 20 Sep 2014)

How to Get There
By Michael Leunig

Go to the end of the path until you get to the gate.
Go through the gate and head straight out
Towards the horizon
Keep going towards the horizon
Sit down and have a rest every now and again
But keep on going.
Just keep with it.
Keep on going as far as you can
That's how you get there.

.. And that is pretty much what I have done these last 5 years ..

These words have implicitly (I knew of them and their meaning before I even read them for the first time) and explicitly guided me when I was completely lost, and without Purpose and Hope .. "Just keep with it" I would say. And it's a pretty good approach to Life, I would think, given the Situation I found myself ..

At some point along the way you do get "There" - it's not overly obvious that you have arrived, but somehow you know .. just like when you were made aware of how far you had fallen without even noticing.

Now ..

You are strong enough to stand on your own two feet and embrace the world again. You are brave enough to start "letting go", to know there is more to "let go", and more importantly to know that is what Jenny would want of me. To know you have another chance. That what forced you to go "through the gate and head straight out" and where you have been to get "There", has made you a better person - and to know that I should not feel guilty about that. That you have been all over and its been all over you. That you are not a Hopeless case. That you are Awesome. That you are still here for a reason. That you know you still have so much to give. That it was not the End, like you thought, but just the chance for another Beginning.

A chance to show you are resilent. A chance to show you can change, adapt and reinvent yourself. A chance to demonstrate you can think of yourself as a survivor and not a victim of circumstance and Life. A chance to consider that you have been lucky to have shared loved. And through that love, empowered to live life to the full along the path you were destined to walk.

Thank you to everyone that have helped me to get "There" these last 5 years. It has been a remarkable Journey and a few Lessons in Life have been learnt!!! I can’t really believe where I have been. I could write a book about it but at least there is a blog - eljeiffel.blogspot.com.au

This is Life (my Life actually) and I have learnt we need to Live and appreciate it while we can. Jenny showed and gave me this. It was her gift to me ..

Why do I write this now? I write this for me and my timeline. And while it might appear a little self-indulgent, I have no regrets - it is who I have become along the way to "There".

More importantly I write it for others who are or will walk "out through the gate" and search for their "There". It's a choice you make and I know you can do it if you set your heart to it.

I know there is further to go but my outlook is different now.

“There” is always Hope - I am another shining example of this!!

Thanks again.

Yesterday's Suffering, Today's Inspiration, Tomorrow's Strength
Geoff (Wed 25 Feb 2015)

A Journey, A Home - My Legacy to the World - Alexandria (Sun 22 Feb 2015)

La Perouse OC6 Regatta - Pacific Dragons Open Crew (Sat 14 Feb 2015)

View on YouTube

Gav writes:

This is the footage from the race. Look, its perhaps not that interesting and drags on a bit but the music is good. I am sending it as we actually have a shark caught on video (see from 1:41). First time ever for the PDs I think. Stu and I noticed it swim past. Footage of it is not that great, but just as good as most bigfoot clips.

Also, you will find the last 2 minutes very entertaining. I promise.

You can watch it in HD by changing the settings

A great day for our Club.

The Beauty of Life - Brooks Jensen (Wed 12 Jan 2015)

Just Married - Jenny and Geoff - My Favourite Photo of Jenny: What a smile!! And I love the way she is holding my hand - South Cronulla Uniting Church (Sun 30 Apr 2000)
Brooks Jenson (*) writes On Life (*):

One never knows in the midst of life when The Moment will happen, but if we are lucky, happen it does, and a new life begins.

via I Am Born (*) by Brooks Jensen (*).

I've been lucky enough to have experienced this in my Life with Jenny. I have lived. Thank you Jenny.

The Pacific Dragons 2014 Inspire Award in the Memory of Jenny Petterson - Glebe/Sydney (Sat 09 Aug 2014)

Nicola, Julia, Joanne and Geoff - Pacific Dragons Presentation Night - Glebe (Sat 09 Aug 2014)
Julia Ryall (*) is the 2014 Inspire Award (*) Winner. She is an amazing person and a most worthy recipient. Here are a few words in support:

Julia has been a member of the club for over 10 years now. She has been the Women’s Dragon Coach for at least 10 years and as such a member of the committee also. She has therefore been a key contributor the functioning of the club, and the creation and shaping of its culture - it's values and ideals [along with our dreams].

Most importantly Julia provides Inspiration to all in her leadership role.

[Leadership and] Inspiration is the key to allowing people to achieve things that deep down we know we can, but often can’t achieve on our own.

The writer David Foster Wallace describes this kind of Leadership as a “mysterious quality, hard to define, but we always know it when we see”. So for me, I know I have seen it with Julia. Rarely I have seen it, experienced it in the community I live, my workplace or the sports I have participated, but feel fortunate to have experienced and seen that mysterious quality through Julia.

She has always been there for us. Sometimes it is hard to be leader, but a real leader does not shy away from difficult decisions, particularly when it is the best for the team.

This year Julia was not able to paddle due to the impending arrival of their first child, Zach. This did not stop her from being on the front of the boat, when she could, coaching us to be the best we can. Drawing out of us, what we knew we could always do, but were afraid to face, maybe due to a lack of self-belief or the fear of failing.

In February, I was privileged to see Julia at her natural best, to motivate the PD’s Women’s team prior to their record 8th time win of the CNY. Her pre-race talk was completely inspiring and there was not dry eye and everyone knew what they had to do to become who they always knew they could be. And, many feel the successful result of that day would not have been achieved without Julia’s leadership, her words, her inspiration. She inspired the team to be achieve what they always knew they could do.

There are dozens of other instances of this and one I can fondly recount is her role as co-Campaign and sole-Regatta [Head] Coach for Macau 2010. She lead us to be the World Club Champions for the Premier Mixed 500m Event. Again her pre-race talk, motivated us to believe in ourselves to become world champions that day.

Julia creates, leads, unifies and motivates a team, and the individuals within it. She is the true essence of the word inspiration.

Congratulations Julia.

National Champions (photo taken by Jenny) - 2006 AusDBF National Dragon Boat Champs - Nagambie (*) (Sun 16 April 2006)
Pacific Dragons Premier Women's Crew - CNY Pre-Final Huddle / Darling Harbour (Sat 08 Feb 2014)
Pacific Dragons Premier Women's Crew - CNY Post Final Photo / Darling Harbour (Sat 08 Feb 2014)
Joanne, Julia and Jenny - AusDBF Australian Champs After Party - Kawana (*) / Qld (Sun 25 Apr 2009)
Remembering Jenny by Julia Ryall

When the swell and the wind combine to treat us to runners,

when the boat run is magical and the sun shines on our backs,

when the water is warm and dolphins swim beside us,

when a rainbow forms overhead or gold hangs warmly on our chests,

when there is a splash, a laugh, a smile or an embrace,

when each individual feels a sense of achievement and

when the team is proud…

We will think of Jen. And, she’ll be there, smiling, shining, sharing the moment.

Always.

Julia Ryall - Tue 30 Jun 2009

On Love, Inspiration and Purpose - Khalik Allah (Fri 01 Aug 2014)

Love Foundation - Amsterdam (Tue 20 Aug 2013)
Khalik Allah (*) responds to the following question On Inspiration (*) and purpose (*):

Question: how did you find your purpose (*)? how did you know? how do you tap into that thing that inspires (*) you deep within and never leaves? thank you. Bless

Khalik Allah (*): When you’re in love (*) you’re inspired (*). Love (*) is magnetic. If I love photography (*) then I’m just gonna keep being with it. If you wanna consistently remain inspired (*) then you gotta have a purpose (*) bigger than photography (*), and then do it for that purpose (*).

via Tumblr (*) by Khalik Allah (*).

Obviously applicable to everything in our lives. Nice to see it so clearly abstracted and stated. Thanks Khalik (*).

A Message To The Broken - You are not Without Hope - Doug Miller (Sun 11 Oct 2009)

Broken - George Street / Redfern (Mon 10 Mar 2014)
Doug Miller (*) writes On Hope (*):

Hope (*) is a thread that exists in our lives. It has been there since the day we took our first breaths. It has existed alongside us as we built our lives. It exists now in the shattered reality of brokenness. Though we are broken, hope remains strong. In our weakness Hope rises as an unbroken thread stretching out into our uncertain (*) future (*), beckoning us to follow and explore the potential that lies dormant and hidden by our pain. Hope waits. Ready for us to reach out and grasp its firm hand. The question is not if hope exists within our brokenness. The real question is if we are willing and able to allow ourselves to stretch out of our brokenness, our preconceived attitudes, and self imposed assumptions and grasp hold of the only hope that exists, the only hope for our brokenness, our humanity and very existence. There is hope and healing and a future no matter what our circumstances. It is true. I have seen it. There are many others that have shared in it as well and testify of its existence and power and potential. Lift your eyes out of the brokenness and glimpse it, it is before you. You are not alone.

You are not without HOPE.

via A Message To The Broken (*) by Doug Miller (*).

An amazing piece of writing. All the more so, if you know the motivation (*) behind it.

A Rainbow always brings Hope - Alexandria (Sun 09 Mar 2014)

Dr Ray Seidler - Kings Cross Clinic / Sydney (Mon 21 Dec 2009)

Dr Raymond Seidler - Kings Cross Clinic (*) / Sydney (Mon 21 Dec 2009)
Today I was saddened to learn of the unexpected death (*) of Dr Raymond Seidler (*) on Thu 25 Jul 2013. He was 61 years old and always looked 15 years younger, no matter his age.

Ray was my GP for 24 years and was always there for me. I loved the diversity of his practice and patients, and he helped me through some challenging times in my life as well as all the little things that require the hand and advice of a Doctor.

We shared an interest in photography and he always had a few moments to talk about the latest digital camera and for us to view a few of the others photos on his desktop computer on his surgery desk.

His father was a professional photographer and Ray had a glass display cabinet full of old cameras in his surgery.

The camera shown above was his Father's. He picked this camera to show me, as he was touched by the hand written notes, made by his Father, on the inside of the camera case (just below his right hand). The notes related to reminders about exposure correction details, I seem to recall. He was more than happy to pose for this photograph.

He was also an earlier adopter of the latest gadget or technology and was a prolific writer (*) and commentator on a diverse range of issues.

I will miss him as my Doctor and as a person I could trust and confide. My thoughts are with his Family in particular, as well as his Friends and Colleagues.

Thank you Ray.

On Constraint and Design - Kevin McCloud - SMH Spectrum (Sat 12 Oct 2013)

The eljeiffel House - Handover Day - Alexandria (Mon 14 Oct 2013)
Kevin McCloud (*) writes On Design (*):

When you're in a hole with no money, you have to be creative (*).

He astutely adds:

Money is an enemy of good design (*) because it stops people thinking (*)

via Broken dreams and home truths (*) by Andrew Taylor (*).

The same can be said when working with a small space. It forces good design and it amazing to watch a great architect (thanks Kerry) create space out of nowhere.

A new life starts today for a beautiful old house that is just on 106 years old. The space is small but it feels big.

This project was something I had never planned for, but life always presents challenges and opportunities we can't predetermine, one of the beauties of life, if you chose it to be.

Once the decision was made, a lot of thought, planning and effort has been put in to get to this point.

While it is a little sad to see bits of the old go, it feels the right thing to do and it is exciting to bring new life to a solid foundation.

May we, who have accepted this challenge and opportunity, be blessed with good fortune to make it happen with a smile on our face.

Looking forward to the 7 month transition that will give you the opportunity to provide another 100 years of sanctuary to whoever seeks haven under your roof.

Let the renovations begin.

The Pacific Dragons 2013 Inspire Award in the Memory of Jenny Petterson - Glebe/Sydney and Dubrovnik/Croatia (Sat 03 Aug 2013)

Jenny - Suzhou / China (Tue 16 Nov 2004) Petar Hektorovic (*) - Tvrdalj Fortress (*) / Stari Grad (*) / Hvar (*) (Wed 31 Jul 2013)
First, a thank you..

Here we are in Dubrovnik.

Croatia, is just beautiful and the highlight has been a small courtyard in the small Fortress of the 16th Century Croatian Poet, Petar Hektorovic, in the tiny town of Stari Grad on the Island of Hvar, two hours by Ferry out of Split. Jo and I spread some of Jenny's ashes there and it was one of the most peaceful places (*) I have experienced and his words (*) seem quite relevant and profound.

We feel privileged and lucky to have the ability to make and have these experiences.

Caitlin, Lisa, Jo, Kaizer and myself have just competed at the 11th World DB Champs with the 2013 Australian Auroras Squad. It was a great event and we have some amazing memories.

The Hungarians have shown the world how to host a modern World Dragon Boat Championships, which have become carnival like because of their size.

It was also great to paddle on a course so rich in paddling history.

The highlight of the championships for me was watching Jo, carry the Australian Flag and leading the whole Australian Squad at the Opening Ceremony.

Joanne, Jenny would be so proud of you as we all are. A tribute (*) to Joanne and those those have supported her in paddling and life will follow the presentation.

On behalf of Caitlin, Lisa, Jo, Kaizer and myself, we thank you all for supporting us in paddling and life. Pacific Dragons provides the home and base which nurtures us as paddlers and people.

A little about Jenny now ..

Jenny said to me towards the end, when the destination of her disease became more real, that she would miss the travel adventures with us - no doubt in travels and in life.

It is just over 4 years ago that she said those words and it would be a few short months later she left this world.

She did not feel sorry for herself in saying those words. She always had a strong sense of reality about her life, her cancer and her purpose in life.

This was one of the inspiring traits I would take from her and one we can all take from her as we face the uncertainties which will become the certainties of our lives.

When she did die, I had already decided that I should live on in her "Afterglow". This was much easier to say than do and for a long time I thought my life purpose had been served and honoured.

Those early days were the hardest of my life and it would take a long time to find my confidence, to start living my life again. That there was a purpose. All I could really do was paddle. In some ways, it was during those days I found myself.

Jenny loved travel, a globe and atlas and it was no surprise that geography was her favourite class. Had she been born in earlier times, she would have a been great explorer - and without doubt, Captain Petterson, as I would call her, would have been an important name in our history books and classes, along with Columbus and Cook.

So, whenever we decided to travel, she was also the navigator, along with Jo, of course. With a sheet of paper and pen in hand, they would thumb through the atlas and rotate the globe charting our path and planning our itinerary.

Croatia was Jenny's choice for our Europe 2009 trip following the World DB Champs in Prague. However, she would not make it here, passing away 9 weeks before the Worlds.

We did not travel to Croatia in 2009. In the haze of grief and bereavement, I can't remember why now.

So for this 2013 Hungary Campaign, we decided that Croatia would be our first stop, in order to honour Jenny's wishes.

As it is with everything now, I feel a sense of guilt that I am alive and experiencing life and Jenny is not. That I am experiencing this trip, Szeged and in particular the Croatian coast and our current port Dubrovnik.

However, these feelings of guilt are balanced with the thought that she inspires us to continue our lives to the full, including creating these experiences. It is what she would want us to do.

Maybe in some ways I feel that when we meet again, I can tell her all the great things we have done.

So while there are feelings of guilt, I balance them with those of inspiration, intention, innocence, naviety and awe. In this way, a perspective on life can be found and along with a sense of empathy, it can give your life a solid foundation even during the toughest moments.

I talk about this because I have come to realise that others have or will have these moments and this is just one way, my way at least, to respond. This is life.

So to the 2013 Inspire Award ..

A common word used in all the presentations over years is the word "Belief". It seems to pop up all the time.

Last year I spoke a little about belief, in the sense that inspiring people seem to have a belief in themselves - we call it self-belief.

So I started to think about where does self belief come from?

I would find an answer a month after, via a blog post by Spencer Lum, a New York based wedding photographer, of all people. His words made it crystal clear to me. He wrote:

[..] if you’re willing to take a gamble, I’ll bet on you. If you’re willing to put it out there, if you’re willing to fail, if you’re willing to let go of it all, thumb your nose at the world, and do it your way, I’ll believe in you. [..]

"I’ll believe in you." Spencer wrote. There it was. The answer was so simple - self belief first comes from others who believe in you.

Often it takes some time to have the confidence to believe in one self. Initially, more often than not, the belief comes from others. Those who support and love you for who you are.

It is only with time, experience and the support of those others who believe in you, that you can find your own self belief and you start say things to yourself like

• yes, I can do that,


• you start finding reasons why you can, rather than you can't, and


• when you question yourself with "why?", you are able to say "well ,why not!"

It is then that things start to happen.

As time goes by, you become stronger, more independent and not afraid to give things a go, even if it means making mistakes and / or failing. You know that the risk is worth the reward of at least trying, whatever the outcome.

So what does this have to do with the 2013 Inspire Award?

The recipient of this award realised her own self-belief this year, initially through the support of her coaches and those that have paddled with her since joining the club.

Something happened this year for her. She had been making changes and steady improvements over the years, but she realised she needed to start believing in herself. It was a natural progression.

I was lucky enough to sit next her one week night dragon boat training session going into CNY. She trained strongly and between sets we chatted briefly. She told me that she needed to start believing in herself and that she was almost there. I was impressed. This is the stuff I had been thinking about.

The next weekend she made this very visible to her coaches, paddling buddies and most importantly, herself, by performing a stunning 4km OC1 time trial out of Dobroyd Point. This was the turning point, the starting point to self belief.

It was fantastic to witness that very moment.

I have seen it time and time again in our club. Coaches and others believing, paddlers changing and then suddenly something remarkable happens. They start believing in themselves. It is the great thing about our club and it is what I love about PDs.

So the 5th and 2013 recipient of the Inspire Award in the Memory of Jenny Petterson is Cath Gale.

A big congratulations to you Cath from Jo and myself. You are an inspiration.

Have a great night all. We will be thinking of you all and we look forward to getting back into it all on our return in late August.
Water - Courtyard Pond - Petar Hektorovic (*) - Tvrdalj Fortress (*) / Stari Grad (*) / Hvar (*) (Wed 31 Jul 2013) Incriptions - Petar Hektorovic (*) - Tvrdalj Fortress (*) / Stari Grad (*) / Hvar (*) (Wed 31 Jul 2013)

2013 Auroras Flag Bearer Speech - Joanne Petterson - Australian Team Dinner / Gyor / Hungary (Sun 21 Jul 2013)

Introducing Joanne Petterson: Your 2013 Auroras Flag Bearer
A Tribute to Joanne and all those who have supported her in paddling and life - Love Geoff (*)
Gyor / Hungary (Sun 21 Jul 2013)
I would just like to say how honoured and proud I am to be representing you as the Australian Flag Bearer.

I love this sport and am very passionate about it and have been fortunate to witness many opening ceremonies and I still can't believe I have been given this honour to carry the flag.

I have been involved in the Australian squads since 2003 and have been fortunate enough to have been included in many great teams and squads, and have met many wonderful people over the years.

Each Aus Sqaud experience has been memorable for all different reasons and we are now making more memories together which we will reminisce over for years to come.

I have loved this time in Gyor and it was so nice to see how good all the divisions looked on the water and how each of the divisions supported each other.

We have all trained hard and put in a lot of work and we are now ready to face the rest of the world, so what is important now is what goes on in your head.

Some things I have learnt over the years are:

1. Trust and believe in yourself, your team mates, coaches and managers knowing we have done everything required.

2. Work together as a team and a squad on and off the water and support each other.

3. Go hard and don't hold back.

4. Focus on doing your best possible race rather than focusing on the result.

5. Be positive and be brave - you can go harder than you thought was possible and your body will be able to do it.

From my experience, I have seen it time and time again, not just in paddling but in life, keep a positive attitude even when things become tougher than you could possibly imagine, as anything is possible.

I know this to be true and I have witnessed many great moments in this sport and through that have realised as the German crew said to us after a Final at the 2009 World Championships "you made the impossible, possible".

I often remember a comment one of my coaches said as we huddled together in a circle after our last race together at the 2009 World Championships. He said "look around at each of your team mates, this will be the last time this team will race together". So saviour the moment.

I'd like to wish everyone well in Szeged, go hard, be strong both physically and mentally, be brave, but most of all have fun, these are all memories we are making together which will last a lifetime.

Running - Evermore (Wed 03 Jun 2009)

Running - Evermore / YouTube (*) (Wed 03 Jun 2009)
I have this song from iTunes and listen to it a lot and finally found the above on YouTube.

I had heard it on the radio when it was released and liked it as an RPM song also.

I watched this with Jenny the night of the big game. I had a little injury and missed the Aus training for Prague that night. Joanne was not there as she was at the training session in the rain and cold. I sat on the lounge while Jenny stretched out and I massaged her feet and toes - something she loved.

At that moment in time we did not know that Jenny had a 4cm brain tumour - that news would come one week later. Another week later she would have the brain tumour removed (*). A week after that her heart would fail (*) to be revived for a painful week in ICU where Jenny would leave us (*), suffering a massive pulmonary embolism.

Maybe the lyrics would become a precursor to the journey that is bereavement, grief and knowing that there is a future. This blog shows this all:

I don't know
I really don't know
If this castle in the sand
Is strong enough to stand

Cause I know
How it feels
All the pain
Is so real
Cause you sink
And you drown
Till your feet hit the ground
Running, running, running, running

I always remember this when I hear this song. It is now nice to have the video from the Games pre game entertainment to remember those moments of innocence before the events that would change our lives forever.

Once upon a time ..

Once upon a time - YouTube (*) (Sat 30 Aug 2009)
Hard to watch in so many ways, but I am glad that this moment in time in our lives was captured. It was just short of 10 weeks since Jenny died. Everything was so raw back then and it makes you realise how far we have come since those moments in Racice.

Five One Hundredths of a Second - 500m Premier Opens Final - AusDBF Nats / Penrith (Fri 19 Apr 2013)

Five One Hundredths of a Second - 500m Premier Opens Final - AusDBF Nats / Penrith (Fri 19 Apr 2013)
Once, twice or, maybe three times (if you are fortunate enough and willing to take the risks) in a paddling career you do something unbelievable. Something you just can’ t explain, though sometimes it worth giving it a try. Here goes ..

You are happy you have made the major final. You know you are up against strong teams. The favourite, the team directly on your left, you have not beaten in three years. In fact you have not been within a boat length, over 500m, for the last two years. Against the odds, and your failing self-confidence, you still somehow believe that we can still get across the line first. To be part of of something great. There is always hope at the start. It is a chance to create who you want to be. You don't get your hopes up too high, as you have been disappointed in the past. You don't think about all of this too much at this point. The focus is putting your best race on the water and seeing how it compares to the others when you have all crossed the line. You are not overly nervous, but you are excited and proud to be there. A supportive and encouraging tap on the knee for those around you. Remember it is a 30 stroke start. Just focus on the first 3 strokes and take it one by one from there. Clean water. Hand out of the water. Blade buried. Make sure you feel and stay connected with the water with every stroke. The starter aligns us and we ready. "Paddlers, are you ready, attention please" .... the gun does not fire for some reason. This has happened a few time before over the years. Keep your focus, no distractions. We will be away soon. Refocus, lets do it again - 30 Start, first 3, deep and clean - feel the water. "Paddlers, are you ready, attention please" ... "GO". You Go on the "G". 1-2-3, up, up, .. 10, up, up, .. 20, up, up, ..7,..30, reach, reach, hinge, hinge. The boat is up and running and there is something there. We are hingeing and driving through the stroke. The boat is more than running, it is been driven through the stroke like it has felt in training over last few weeks, except this time it is race intensity, not level 4, Remember this Geoff, Remember this moment. We are there next to them, where usually they pull away here, but we talked about staying connected. Give it everything to the 250m and refocus. Somehow, we are sttil there at the 250m. Refocus and reinvent yourself, I think. Drive, Drive is the call, We are still there, connected. You have a 6th sense (and good hearing) and you know without looking that our drummers are side by side. Passing the 200m start hut and the little red lane marker buoy. There is something uplifting in our Sweep's voice - "you are doing it". The lane buoys turn to red - we are 100m out. We have done everything our training has given our bodies - it's amazing to find that something extra that the sport scientists say should not be there. Mentally, prepare for the lift home. This is the most crucial part of the race - they are probably a nose ahead. We are going to have to do something amazing - something the other teams have pulled on us often over the years. "do it for the gold (or was it girls?)" is the call. We lift. We lift. The rate comes up a touch and the boat becomes light as we surge forward with every stroke - narrowing the margin. It is all clear as day, those last few strokes. You give it everything you've got when there is nothing to give. You cross the line, you hear the finish horn blast away in succussion. You look across and you know you have done it. The look in your competitors faces tell you that they know you have also done it and you take a few quiet moments to take it all in, while some of the others around you show their elation more jubilantly. Gasping for air, you touch the same knees as you did before the start. This time the "ritual" tap is to acknowledge your team mates efforts and the fact that you have done something that does not happen that often in a paddling career. "Three cheers for the other crews" is the call from our Drummer - three "hip hip". and a breathless "hooray". We bring the boats in and we all get off. Back slaps and hugs all around. Not even a second thought who won that one as you make your way through the other 180 or so paddlers you have just competed against. You smile and for some reason laugh. This kind of win does not happen that often - "take it in", "take it in" you say to yourself. You see many familiar faces as you walk through the line. They are happy for you. Many you have experienced some amazing experiences around the world in Australian Campaigns past and you hope that the journey with them will continue. Somewhere along the way you hear that we did it by five one hundredths of a second. You know the course well and you smile that you can pick such a small amount of time moments after crossing the line. What a race. You think to yourself, "it's not that we won it, it is how we won it" – it's just not what was expected by many (including yourself) and that is the beauty of dragon boat racing - the randomness and uncertainty to some extent. The boat has never felt like that out of the start and into the transition. You think to yourself, you have never paddled like that before. You feel fortunate that you took the risk to be there, you did the training, the testing, you've put yourself on the line time and time again. You have been crushed by the ramifications of defeat and oddly enough, those one or two other once in a life time victories . At the end of the day you know that it is worth the sacrifices you make to do what you have done, do and hope to do. Maybe this is not the end, but a new beginning ..

I will leave this unedited. It’s just a stream of thought that came out of my subconscious in the last 20 mins. Hope it makes sense and it will be fun to read, many year’s into the future.

Five One Hundredths of a Second - 500m Premier Opens Final - AusDBF Nats / Penrith (Fri 19 Apr 2013)

2013 Auroras Senior B Selection Squad - Lotus Bay / Canberra (Fri 21 Dec - Sun 23 Dec 2012)

2013 Auroras Senior B Selection Squad - Lotus Bay / Canberra (Sun 23 Dec 2012) 2013 Auroras Senior B Selection Squad (Left Crop) - Lotus Bay / Canberra (Sun 23 Dec 2012) 2013 Auroras Senior B Selection Squad (Right Crop) - Lotus Bay / Canberra (Sun 23 Dec 2012)
Note to self. A personal guide for the Campaign and beyond ..

A few photos and words from my heart following the 2013 Auroras Senior B Selection Camp in Canberra from 21-23 Dec 2012.

Congratulations to all that put themselves forward for selection for the 2013 Auroras Senior B Dragon Boat Squad which will participate at the World Dragon Boat Championships in Szeged, Hungary in late July 2013.

Putting yourself up for selection and having dreams, hopes and goals is always a risky business as they can all be dashed in a moment.

For those whose journey for this campaign ended at the selection camp, you have my admiration and respect. My heart goes out to you, but I also know that there are future opportunities and with a plan, determination and perseverance you can achieve everything you want out of paddling and life. We have a number of role models in this regard and I encourage you to follow their lead. The camp will have given you perspective and a path forward to realising all your dreams and goals. It's a decision you make and it is all in your hands.

For those successful in selection, I congratulate you and I feel your elation in the trust the coaches have given us to represent Australia as the 2013 Auroras Senior B World Championship Dragon Boat Squad.

I thank those from the 2011 Auroras Squad (*) who have come back to give it another go. Your experience will be invaluable as we all learnt so much about ourselves, the importance of teamwork and what it is to compete on the world stage against the best the world has to offer.

The competition is intense and goals are achieved through your commitment to the training programme; trust in yourself, your team mates, managers and coaches.

Having done a few campaigns now, my advice is to savior every moment of the campaign. There can be feelings of elation, disappointment and every emotion in between. That is the nature of paddling at this level and I have learnt it is how we handle and respond to these emotions, that will mould who we are and who we will become. You have to an awareness of yourself and those around you - to be emotionally strong not only for yourself, but more importantly for the team, since our sport is the true essence of team work.

There are few words that stick in my mind from all my experiences in paddling and life. They are Trust, Belief and Risk.

Trust - Trust yourselves, your team mates, your managers and coaches. Remember the first time you stood in dragon boat in the standup paddle drill at the selection camp. Serge and Blair would not have asked us to do this if they thought we could not do it. They trusted us, as we trusted them. I saw no hesitation from either side. This is the kind of trust we need to find, particularly when we are uncertain. We just need to go with it and it will happen.

Belief (*) - You have to believe in yourself, and your supporters in paddling and in life. Most importantly you have to believe in the campaign, the process, your team mates, managers and coaches. I find this quote (*) gives me perspective, understanding and strength:

If you believe, you are stronger and the light will shine on you.

Risk - by getting to this point, we have all proved we are not averse to taking a risk or two. At this level, the stakes and emotions are heightened. There are risks all round as we step into the unknown to compete against the best in the world. We have control of many things and this is our focus, but there are others things which we don't, for as you see, I have learnt there is an underlying randomness to it all. This is where adaptability comes in, as we respond in a measured and considered way to the random events that are tossed our way and that which we may confront. Take nothing for granted, success is not attained easily. Often, time and persistence is required.

Finally, be prepared to let go of everything you know and to start from zero (*). It would take me a long time to learn this one and it only came to me in Busan (*) at the 2012 Asian Dragon Boat Championships in Sep 2012. Ask Paul Langley as we learnt this together in the Mixed 10's (*). I became the paddler and person I always wanted to be on that hot sunny day in Busan.

We have an amazing blend of enthusiasm, hardened experience and raw newness at this level. Focus on what you can control, trust and believe and the rest will look after itself. I feel privileged to share this experience with you and look forward to what lays ahead.

2013 Auroras Grand Masters Selection Squad Camp - Lotus Bay / Canberra (Fri 21 Dec - Sat 23 Dec 2012)

On Life - Spencer Lum / Ground Glass (Wed 28 Nov 2012)

Water [1] - Sapphire Pines / Brisbane (Sun 02 Sep 2012)
As always, another inspiring post from Spencer Lum (*) where he writes in Everyone gets the 15% (*):

When you look back at the end of it all, there’s really only one person you’ll have to answer to.

Yourself.

And if you never gave up, and you always kept pushing with the power of belief (*) behind the message you spread and the gift you shared, then you can hold your head high when you ask yourself what it was all for.

Because you’ll know you lived life. And life is a hell of a ride if you’re willing to get on.

[1] I was up early on the last day of camp. Went for a walk along where we trained. It was beautiful and calm and another water photo is added to my little collection (*). The early morning light was strong but even and the were ducks feeding amongst the reeds. A couple of fisherman were out with lures. They did not catch anything but I know they were just happy to be up early appreciating nature and the anticipation (*) of a bite. For me, as I walked and admired the view, there was the anticipation (*) of flying out, the next day, to the Busan (*) for the 2012 Asian Dragon Boat championships.

On Building Confidence - Brainwaves / Australian Institute of Sport

Start from Zero - "and that is how it felt, and so I did .." - Busan (Wed 05 Sep 2012)
On Building Confidence (*):

We build confidence by:

• working hard at training


• practising good self-management


• rewarding ourselves when successful


• recording/logging our successes.

To enhance self-confidence you need to take responsibility for your successes and failures.

It is important to remember that when you talk about success you mean performing to the best of your ability rather than winning.

When you succeed you need to remember that it is because you are a good athlete and have worked hard, not because you are lucky.

Similarly, when you fail to achieve your best you need to remember that there is probably a logical explanation and that you should talk it over with your coach. It is never because you are not good enough.

via Brainwaves (*).

Some great memories from Busan 2012 to help boost the confidence ..

2012 Auroras Mixed 500m 10's Crew - 10th Asian Dragon Boat Championships - Busan (Sat 08 Sep 2012)
2012 Auroras Mixed 500m 10's Crew - 10th Asian Dragon Boat Championships - Busan (Sat 08 Sep 2012)
2012 Auroras Mixed 500m 10's Crew - 10th Asian Dragon Boat Championships - Busan (Sat 08 Sep 2012)
Jo, Serge and Geoff - 10th Asian Dragon Boat Championships - Busan (Sat 08 Sep 2012)
Jo, Betty (our No.1 Supporter) and Geoff - 10th Asian Dragon Boat Championships - Busan (Sat 08 Sep 2012)

On Belief - Vern Gambetta (Tue 11 Nov 2008)

Joanne and Geoff - 2012 Pacific Dragons Auroras
Day 2 / 500m / 10th Asian Dragon Boat Championships
Centum / Busan (Sat 08 Sep 2012)
Vern Gambetta (*) writes (*) on Belief:

Belief - If you don’t believe in yourself who will?

Think you are the best and you are on your way.

Confidence, believe in yourself, your preparation and in your support system.

Sat 08 Sep 2012, the light shone (*) on the 2012 Auroras.

Congratulations to all 2012 Auroras representing Australia at the 10th Asian Dragon Boat Championships in Busan, South Korea. I hope your experience and the amazing results achieved will give you confidence and strength to continue on with your endeavours in paddling and life.

A hugh thank you to Joanne who keeps me pointing in the right direction when the going gets tough. Joanne you are a legend.

500m Mixed 12 - Bronze Podium - Centum / Busan (Sat 08 Sep 2012)
500m Mixed 20 - Bronze Podium - Centum / Busan (Sat 08 Sep 2012)
500m Open 12 - Bronze Podium - Centum / Busan (Sat 08 Sep 2012)
500m Women 20 - Bronze Podium - Centum / Busan (Sat 08 Sep 2012)