Showing posts sorted by relevance for query "Not much". Sort by date Show all posts
Showing posts sorted by relevance for query "Not much". Sort by date Show all posts

Saturday, June 25, 2011

Not Enough and Jump (encore) - Van Halen - David Letterman - 1995 (youtube)

Not Enough (more) and Jump (encore) - Van Halen - David Letterman Show 1995 (youtube)

Always try to find a Letterman live performance whenever I put a music video here. Was hoping to find Jump (heard it on the radio yesterday for the time in many years) but ended up with this beautiful song, Not Enough. And believe it or not, there is small encore for the last 50 seconds where they play Jump.

Not Enough Lyrics

To love somebody naturally
To love somebody faithfully
To love somebody equally
Is not enough, it's not enough
It's not enough

To love somebody secretly (And never touch)
To love somebody honestly (And always trust)
To love somebody tenderly
The tender touch is not enough
It's not enough

Love hurts you sometimes
It's not so easy to find, no
Searchin' everywhere, you turn and swear (Ahh-ahh-ahh)
It's always been there

To love somebody foolishly
(Can happen once)
To love somebody hopelessly
(It hurts so much)
To love somebody equally
Is not enough, it's not enough
It's not enough

Love takes a little time
It's not so easy to find, no, no
Searchin' everywhere, you turn and swear
It's always been there

(Guitar Solo)
Standin' there....

Oh!

And if it don't come easily
One thing you must believe
You can always have trust in me
'Cause my heart will always be yours honestly

Yeah! Love hurts you sometimes
Not so easy to find, no-oh
Searchin' everywhere, you turn and swear (Ahh-ahh-ahh)
It's always been there, standin' there
Love hurts you sometimes
It's not yours, it's not mine, no-oh
Love is only to share
You turn and swear (Ahh-ahh-ahh) it's everywhere
Standin' there (Ahh-ahh)
'Cause it's always been there

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

The Lucky Ones

This is a work in progress. It has been in my head for a long time now, but it has been hard to write. Hopefully, it will make sense. I expect to modify it a bit over the next few weeks, but at least it is a start.

A few months before Jenny died, I read Lance Armstrong's book entitled "Its not about the bike". Jenny had been given a copy by a long time friend, Mena, not long after the book was first published here in Australia (sometime around 2002/3 I am guessing). She read the book quickly and I know she got a lot from the pages. For some reason I did not read the book until early May 2009.

Geoff, Jenny, Mena, Steve and Joanne - Natation DB Titles - Kawana / Qld - Sat 25 Apr 2009 (picasa)


I bought my own copy so that I could read the book that meant so much to Jenny. I think I was motivated by the fact the Jenny was progressing to the final stages of her Cancer (at least that is reluctantly what I quietly started to think - she had just been diagnosed with multiple tumors in her liver on the 11 Mar 2009 - not a very promising situation). I thought I might find something in the pages to understand her and our situation.

I read the book, intermittently over a few weeks, at my local coffee shop before work and on the train to work. There was lots of the book that resonated with me, particularly his encounters with cancer. One part in particular struck a chord with me. It was about a half through, where he writes about what he felt during chemotherapy following neurosurgery to remove a beign brain tumor.

What is stronger, fear or hope? It's an interesting question, and perhaps even an important one. Initially, I was very fearful and without much hope, but as I sat there and absorbed the full extent of my illness, I refused to let the fear completely blot out my optimism. Something told me that fear should never fully rule the heart, and I decided not to be afraid.

I wanted to live, but whether I would or not was a mystery, and in the midst of confronting that fact, even at that moment, I was beginning to sense that to stare into the heart of such a fearful mystery wasn't a bad thing. To be afraid is a priceless education. Once you have been that scared, you know more about your frailty than most people, and I think that changes a man. I was brought low, and there was nothing to take refuge in but the philosophical: this disease would force me to ask more of myself as person than I ever had before, and to seek out a different ethic.

A couple of days earlier, I had received an e-mail from a military guy stationed in Asia. He was a fellow cancer patient, and he wanted to tell me something.

"You don't know it yet," he wrote, "but we're the lucky ones."

I'd said aloud, "This guy's a nut."

What on earth could he mean?

When I read this, I stored it away in my mind, eagerly awaiting Lance's own answer to this question - lucky .. What on earth could he mean?. It would come quietly on the last page of the book.

"You don't know it yet, but we're the lucky ones," my fellow cancer patient had written.

I will always carry the lesson of cancer with me, and feel that I'm a member of the cancer community. I believe I have an obligation to make something better out of my life than before, and to help my fellow human beings who are dealing with the disease. It's a community of shared experience. Anyone who has heard the words You have cancer and thought, "Oh, my God, I'm going to die," is a member of it. If you've ever belonged, you never leave.

Jenny had often indicated that she felt lucky (I think in both aspects - that of surviving an aggressive cancer and oddly enough, having had had cancer). She said this in the Australian Story Episode, "In the Pink":

'I don't understand how things work out, and why things work out the way they do. I feel like I've been lucky. I don't understand how cancer works, I don't know why I've been blessed the way I have been.'

Jenny - Australian Story - "In the Pink - Kirrawee - May 2004 (picasa)


and in her Talks:

'I feel I am so lucky and have a wonderful life. I have had some great opportunities through breast cancer to meet some very inspiring people. Geoff and Jo have been a constant source of support for me. Breast cancer has totally changed my life but for the best.'

Relay for Life 2007 - Jenny - Survivor Representative - Sylvania Waters - Sat 28 Apr 2007 (picasa)


The Rainbow Connection - Phil, John, Marj, Jenny, Liz, Noel - Phil passed away shortly after this photo was taken - he often spoke to Jenny about how luck seemed to play a big part in how things worked out, but sometimes you make you own luck - Rely for Life 2003 - Sylvania Waters - Sat 31 May 2003 - (picasa)


As Jenny's International Dragon Boating Career started, she came to the attention of the Media and in the first Newspaper Article she featured in, she was even compared to Lance Armstrong:

Don Iverson, Director of the Health and Productivity Research Center at the University of Wollongong, said that Ms Petterson could be compared to Lance Armstrong, who won the Tour de France after fighting testicular cancer.

'It's almost superhuman,' he said.

Cancer wont slow rowing champion - Sydney Sun Herald - 2 May 2004


She was a little embarrassed by the comparison, but Jo and I were very proud of Jenny and her achievements in her treatment, her sport and her life as breast cancer survivor.

Geoff, Jenny, Grace, Lynn, Betty, Thomas, Grant, Joanne and David - Relay for Life 2007 - Jenny - Survivor Representative - Sylvania Waters - Sat 28 Apr 2007 (picasa)



After Jenny's passing, I had an encounter in the Intensive Care Unit where Jenny left us. Joanne and I had gone back to thank the staff at the St George Hospital and to pickup some scans that had been lost in Jenny's move from the Level 1 to ICU. We spoke to the head ICU nurses (they were between shifts) and we knew both of them from Jenny's time in ICU (and I was well known to them as I had fainted in ICU on Jenny's second day in ICU after the neurosurgery). We talked a little and I mentioned that Jenny did consider herself lucky to have had cancer - as she said herself - it had changed her life for the better. One the nurses questioned this statement and she made me feel a little uneasy for saying what I had said. She could not believe anyone with cancer could consider themselves lucky. Maybe, she had seen too much of the cold harsh reality of cancer in that ICU. Maybe she was right. It did not seem too lucky now that Jenny was gone?

This conversation stuck in my mind for a long time, and I started to question many things. It was not until I came across the following blog post by Doug Miller that I found some peace. Here was a man who had recently been diagnosed with Cancer. He was articulate and in many ways his post offers so much more than Lance's writings on Cancer and Luck. This is probably the most moving piece of writing I have read in my life. I don't have cancer, but I have lived a shared life with it and it's consequences. I can truly emphasise. Here it is. My heart is with you Doug ..

Doug Miller - Colorado Trail San Juan Mountains - 1994 - A Single Path - (blog)


The Lucky Ones by Doug Miller (Wed 23 Sep 2009)

[..] a friend [..] pointed me to Lance Armstrong's book entitled "Its not about the bike" I picked up a copy and quickly read through it. I liked it.

It had a bit much detail focusing on cycling, but that was an aspect of the man that could obviously not be separated from the larger reality of his battle with cancer.

There were portions though that left my mind spinning. Armstrong's description of his diagnosis and the roller coaster of emotions that ensued was painfully raw and hit the mark with a clarity and similarity I could not deny. I myself am walking those darkened and fearful paths as I write these very words.

Out of all the pages a couple simple statements that he made resonated with me in a powerful way.

Armstrong tells of a letter that he received. It was from a man he had never met before. He himself had battled cancer. He wrote Armstrong to acknowledge his support and positive thoughts. As he finished the letter he made a strange statement that confused Armstrong. He wrote, "you probably do not understand this right now, but we are the lucky ones".

What? How is anyone with cancer lucky? It is devastating. It not only has the potential to steal your life, but also has the destructive potential to steal your Hope. Those words are haunting. Lucky? We are the lucky ones. This brotherhood of suffering is somehow lucky..........blessed?

It is diametrically opposed to any sort of sane thinking that those outside of this brotherhood would agree with. It actually is an almost dangerous statement. As if you say it as you are waking off a cliff without a safety net. A statement such as that redefines everything. Life. Death. And even Hope.

But as I walk this path, and simultaneously encounter life in all its beauty and harshness, I find myself agreeing. "We are the lucky ones". I am lucky. I say those words with a part of me screaming, "how dare you, how can you say that". But it is true. The perspective that cancer gives to life is unbelievable. It has the power to refine you. Your thoughts. Your direction. Your focus.

It is as if you look at life for the first time. Everything is different. Nothing is the same. Everything is turned on edge, revealing a freshness and an urgency that is not seen outside of cancer. If this clarity does exist in our normal lives, it is missed. Overshadowed by the busyness of life. By worthless and empty pursuits.

Another quote from Armstrong's book was this: "Cancer is not about dying, it is about living" What a statement.

Most would argue against it. But those that walk this path find it to be true. Life after diagnosis becomes "alive". It becomes real. It is as if you can grasp it with your own hands, breath it in, consume it.

Oh if I could have had this view earlier in life. I knew that it existed. I sensed it. I chased it. Through the mountains. Through relationships. In the woods and fields of my youth. It was a whisper in the words of poets. And a reflection on the horizon as the sun slipped out of view. But i did not catch it until cancer became my reference. My reality.

We who are members of this brotherhood and sisterhood of suffering are the lucky ones, because now we can truly live. And Love. And Hope. And I dare to say Dream. They are painful dreams, haunted with the shadows of uncertainty, but they are vivid dreams. Passionate dreams. Dreams that leave your heart aching, your soul longing. We are released from the fear of death. Our finite lives are bared.

We come face to face with our mortality and realize that life is looking back at us. Raw and uncertain. But ALIVE none the less. There were days before cancer that I despaired. At times despising my life. But now I am hungry to live. I long to live. Whether that time be long or short, I hold tight to life and all of its glorious agony.

Posted by Doug Miller at 9:11 PM

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Favourite Photos - How much beauty in decay! - Hyde Park/Sydney - Dec 2001

Leaf - How much beauty in decay! - Hyde Park/Sydney - Wed 27 Dec 2001 (picasa)

A photo I took after work during the Christmas New Year period of 2001. Fires were burning all round Sydney and the sky was covered in smoke which resulted in a strange orange colour which can be seen in this photo. At the time I was reading much about photography and various photographers. This particular photo was inspired by Eliot Porter.

Eliot Porter was a photographer I found early on in my photography journey and self-education. It was easy to appreciate his work (google). He was a pioneer of colour photography (more here) and his life work was bequested to the Amon Carter Museum in 1990 shortly before he died (NYT Orbituary).

Not sure how I found him, but his name seems to appear whenever landscape photographers start talking about Colour Landscape Photography when compared to Black and White Landscape Photography, particularly that of Ansel Adams (looking at the size of the wikipedia entries, it is easy to see who was more popular both as a photographer and selection of photographic technique).

Found some interesting information about him searching the web (google). Also, found some of his books (along with those of Australia's own Peter Dombrovskis) in the National Library of Australia and would often take a look at them in NLA's reading rooms when in Canberra. Many of his photos resonated with my own vision and definitely influenced me when taking landscape (even streetscape and travel) photos, particularly in the Snow Mountains.

At the UNSW I found the book Eliot Porter: photographs and text (a great article) by Eliot Porter. Learnt a lot from the text and photos selected for the book. The following is a quote (see my photo.net page) from the book, which helped form my photographic vision ..
"It is the beauty of nature that I try to represent by photography. What this expression means to most people, I am quite sure, is such features as flowers of spring, autumn foliage, mountain landscapes, and many other similar aspects about aesthetic qualities of which no one would care to offer contradiction. That they are beautiful is indisputable, but they are not all that is beautiful about nature; in fact they are only the obvious and superficial aspects of nature - which anyone may observe with half and eye. They are the peaks and summits of nature's greatest displays. There is no doubt about their importance; they could not be dispensed with. Underlying and supporting these brillant displays are slow, quiet processes that pass almost unnoticed from season to season, unnoticed by those that think that beauty in natures is all its gaudy displays.

Much is missed if we have eyes only for the bright colors. Nature should be viewed without distinction. All her processes and evolutions are beautiful or ugly to the unbiased and indiscriminating observer. She makes no choice herself; everything that happens has equal significance. Nothing can dispensed with. This is a common mistake that many people make; they think that half of nature can be destroyed - the uncomfortable half - while still retaining the acceptable and the pleasing side; their idea is a paradise where nature stands still. Withering flowers blooming, death follows growth, decay follows death, and life follows decay - in a wonderful, complicated, endless web the beauties of which are manifest to a point of view attached to vulgar restricting concepts of what constitutes beauty in nature. Thoreau, who observerd all aspects of nature throughout his life, repeatedly remarked on the beauty of the unaccepted. 'How much beauty in decay!' he exclaimed on examining a worm-eaten leaf. To him the sere, brown leaves of winter were as beautiful as the fresh green of spring. This was a principle that has remained important for me throughout my career."
A fairly long quote, but for me was definitely something worth remembering.

This link provides a great summary of the life and works of Eliot Porter. I like the ending quote ..

The final paragraphs on the art of photography touch on his views to color, composition and emotional content of his images:
"Sensitivity cannot be faked by trickor devise; it has no substitute, and any attempt to replace it with mechancial contrivances is certain to be apparent to the more discerning critics. Not all photographs have to be inspired to be worth making, but the best, rare photographs are the result of a a force at least very close to inspiration. Formulized work becomes impersonal, an all the individuality of authorship tends to disappear. It unquestionably has its uses, but it is not art."
The book itself echoes Porter's ability to redact nature's chaos into a single harmonious image, and is a well-deserved tribute to this pioneer of color nature photography.


The following was one of my favourite Eliot Porter photos:

Pool in a Brook, Brook Pond/New Hampshire by Eliot Porter - 04 Oct 1953 (Carter Museum)

I recently thought of Eliot Porter and the above photo, when I took the following photo during the 2010 Ord River Marathon:

Ord River Reflections - 2010 Ord River Marathon - Sun 14 Jun 2010

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

The Cole Classic by Steve Christo - Sydney Life 2010

The Cole Classic by Steve Christo - Hyde Park/Sydney - 29 Sep 2010 (picasa)

Funny how photos (like music) take you back in time and in your memories. Recently saw the above photo at the 2010 Sydney Life Exhibition in Hyde Park.

Occasionally I hear or read about The Cole Classic, typically around the time of year which it is run (Jan/Feb). It was originally held at Bondi, but it moved to Manly some years ago.

Graham Cole was the founder of the The Cole Classic (see end of this post for more details). He was Sydney Solictor and a very keen swimmer. He was also the Landlord of the first house that I moved into when I had finished my University Degree in late 1982. Robyn, Mal and I moved into a 3 bedroom two storey terrace in Ebley Street, Bondi Junction in Jan 1983.

The move to Bondi Junction was a big change from the sheltered and idyllic surrounds of Wesley College where we had all spent 3-4 years living and studying. It also marked the beginning of our careers in our chosen professions. We enjoyed the change and having a place to live outside of the University. The Eastern Suburbs Railway had recently been completed and with a 5 minute walk to the Bondi Junction Railway Station, it was a quick trip to Town Hall and then a short walk to where I worked (almost 30 years later I still work in the same building but there have been plenty of moves and changes along the way).

Every month I paid the rent and I would wander down to the then P&O Building to give Graham's Secretary a cheque. He would often come out of his office and we would have a chat. In these chats I did get to hear some swimming stories and that he loved surfing at Bondi. At some stage he did mention The Cole Classic (in 1983 the first Cole Classic was swum with 101 swimmers participating).

He was always a very accomodating Landlord and he allowed us to do some wallpaper removal and painting to one of the rooms (the Red and White striped wallpaper a previous tenant had put up, was a bit much for Robyn, whose room it was). Around the same time he indicated he needed to paint the railings of the balcony to the front upstairs bedroom. He said he would come round one weekend to get it done. Mal and I gave him a hand and the job was done quickly over a couple of weekends.

Ebley Street - Bondi Junction - 30 Sep 2010 (picasa)

Moving forward just over 27 years ..

Coincidently, the day after I took the above Sydney Like 2010 Photo, I had to go to Bondi Junction for an appointment. Decided after the appointment I would go around to the old place (it was not far), have a look and take a couple of photos.

Not much has changed from the outside except for a new coat of paint - it was a dark green in the early 1980's. The Balcony railing was still there, I remember that weekend we painted it way back in the late summer of 1982/1983.

The Waverley Tower still hovers over Bondi Junction and Waverley, but it now has a lot more antenna's - mobile phones were certainly not mainstream public technology in the early to mid 1980's.

Ebley Street - Bondi Junction - 30 Sep 2010 (picasa)

Sadly, I remember reading in 2000 that Graham had died of a heart attack while swimming at his beloved Bondi Beach. From the Sydney Morning Herald dated the 06 Dec 2002 in an article titled At the Cole face:
He was 72 and had been told by his doctor to take things easy after developing a heart murmur. "But the surf called," says his son. "He went out, had a good surf, was talking to his mates on the beach, had a heart attack and died on the beach. It was unexpected. The guy was fit and robust. But it was a perfect way for him to go. He orchestrated it well."
I also remember reading this article in the Sydney Morning Herald in February this year. It gives an insight into how much The Cole Classic has grown.

It is such a long time ago now, I have trouble remembering much more than heading down to Bondi Beach after work to catch some waves on a newly purchased bogey board.

However, the most obvious memory for me of the place is the phone call I received there from my Mother in Wagga Wagga on the evening of Sunday 24 Jul 1983 to tell me my father had died of heart failure that evening at our Family Doctor's surgery after playing a game of hockey that afternoon. He was just a few months past his 47th Birthday. He lived just a couple weeks longer than Jenny.

Funny the things you remember when you see a photo.

From the History page of the www.coleclassic.com ..

How it all began

Graham Cole was a keen ocean swimmer, regularly swimming and body surfing at Bondi Beach. In 1981 he travelled to Hawaii with a team from the Tattersals Club to swim in the Waikiki Roughwater. He returned with a desire to establish a similar event in Sydney, reasoning that Australian beaches and strong beach culture were deserving of such an event and that it should be open to all members of the community who had done the necessary training. In 1982 Graham wrote;
The event is not a race but a challenge to all persons to stretch themselves in body and mind to swim a reasonable distance through surf. It will, I hope, be an incentive to persons to involve themselves in the self-discipline required to get fit; obtain confidence in their ability through swimming, to achieve a pride in having performed something that is, perhaps slightly above average, and finally to receive (in the form of an appropriately prepared Certificate or medal) some recognition of their accomplishment.
In 1983 the first Cole Classic was swum with 101 swimmers participating.

Saturday, April 10, 2010

Favourite Photos: Perisher Valley 2002 - Freezing

Freezing - Perisher Valley - 25 Jun 2002 (picasa)


As well as traveling to the Snowy Mountains during summer, Jenny, Jo and I decided to spend some time in the Mountains during Winter. We did this in Jun 2000, 2001 and 2002. After that the Dragon Boating took over our winters.

It was always nice to go to Perisher during the first week of the ski season (mid-late June) where the Boonoona Ski Lodge was not really that busy - mainly accountants getting a small holiday in before the end of financial year rush.

Jenny and Jo were good skiers and they were able to get out onto the ski fields, while I did some reading and wondering around the local snow covered bush land. Would always have my camera at hand and found many nice photos from these little (actually some were quite long) walks.

This particular photo was taken on the side of the Perisher Valley Water Supply Dam. It was near sunset and there was a nice golden glow on the water. The original photo is shown below.

When I got back to Sydney, I uploaded the a cropped version to my photo.net portfolio (see here). In the discussion I provided the original uncropped photo, which is shown below, and I wondered which was better (cropped or uncropped?).

'Freezing' (Orignal) - Perisher Valley - 25 Jun 2002 (picasa)

I was pleased to receive this well thought out response from Marc G:

Very clearly, for me, the cropped version is better. Just sharing with you, here, a very simple method I use for years to know in similar cases whether it should be cropped or not.

I just ask myself "what I have I lost if I crop ? What have I gained ?

Here, the crop makes you lose the extension of this line - but it isn't a curved extension, so not very elegant, and not actually a loss. Then, no other important elements at the bottom. Now what have you gained ? You have gained simplicity and peace. Peace because you gained simplicity, and peace because that's in general what comes with squares - by the books.

Now in what sense have you gained simplicity ?

That's the most important question. The curved line being shorter, it is seen faster. Since we start from top left and go down, and since what was in the lower part was nothing great, we can say that here we keep only the nectar.

In the original, the nectar came with not much at the end. Then, here, since the eye is quickly finished with the main curve, it then moves to the right, and that's where it can find extra beauty in the dented ice and in the light at the top.

Basically, you kept the best only. Honestly, I would never have thought of hanging the original on my walls, but this one, I would - without a single hesitation. If you are interested, by the way, I'd buy a print of this - provided you give me a good price. It is no, to me, the best ice shot I've seen on this site, without a doubt for me, and I'd regard this as POW material - if I were an elfe, that is...:-))

Meanwhile, if you are keen, I'm serious, let me know the price for a 50 cm square print... Regards.
Marc G. August 05, 2002; 02:00 P.M.

All of his critique made sense to me and I was very happy that a professional photographer would like one of my photos so much - was quite flattered. Unfortunately, the photo was taken on a small digital camera (1600 by 1200 pixels) and there was no way the image could be printed to a 50cm square. I would send the full-size original to Marc with my thanks for such a helpful critique and my best wishes that he might find something useful from the original file.

Over the years I have played around with the cropping of this image and I am quite satisfied with the version below.

'Freezing' (Alternate Crop) - Perisher Valley - 25 Jun 2002 (picasa)

Tuesday, October 20, 2015

The Importance of Elsewhere - Philip Larkin

Sunrise - somewhere between Lourdes and Col de Portet d'Aspet / France (Wed 23 Sep 2009)

The Importance of Elsewhere by Philip Larkin:

Lonely in Ireland, since it was not home,
Strangeness made sense. The salt rebuff of speech,
Insisting so on difference, made me welcome:
Once that was recognised, we were in touch.

Their draughty streets, end-on to hills, the faint
Archaic smell of dockland, like a stable,
The herring-hawker's cry, dwindling, went
To prove me separate, not unworkable.

Living in England has no such excuse:
These are my customs and establishments
It would be much more serious to refuse.
Here no elsewhere underwrites my existence.

Referenced in The Importance of Here by Kathryn Heyman - Good Weekend (Sun 15 Jul 2006) posted here on Thu 10 Sep 2015.

Not exactly sure I feel the same release from who I am when away from home. If anything I regress more into myself to the point that I make sure I am oblvious to anyone. Admire people who have the confidence to be themselves wherever they are. It's a great quality to have and it certainly would make life a bit more comfortable.

I am who I am and there is not much point trying to be something, or hoping to be something, I am not. It's too hard and I worked that one out a long time ago, though I do try every now and then to push myself a little.

Friday, April 26, 2013

Five One Hundredths of a Second - 500m Premier Opens Final - AusDBF Nats / Penrith (Fri 19 Apr 2013)

Five One Hundredths of a Second - 500m Premier Opens Final - AusDBF Nats / Penrith (Fri 19 Apr 2013)

Once, twice or, maybe three times (if you are fortunate enough and willing to take the risks) in a paddling career you do something unbelievable. Something you just can’ t explain, though sometimes it worth giving it a try. Here goes ..
You are happy you have made the major final. You know you are up against strong teams. The favourite, the team directly on your left, you have not beaten in three years. In fact you have not been within a boat length, over 500m, for the last two years. Against the odds, and your failing self-confidence, you still somehow believe that we can still get across the line first. To be part of of something great. There is always hope at the start. It is a chance to create who you want to be. You don't get your hopes up too high, as you have been disappointed in the past. You don't think about all of this too much at this point. The focus is putting your best race on the water and seeing how it compares to the others when you have all crossed the line. You are not overly nervous, but you are excited and proud to be there. A supportive and encouraging tap on the knee for those around you. Remember it is a 30 stroke start. Just focus on the first 3 strokes and take it one by one from there. Clean water. Hand out of the water. Blade buried. Make sure you feel and stay connected with the water with every stroke. The starter aligns us and we ready. "Paddlers, are you ready, attention please" .... the gun does not fire for some reason. This has happened a few time before over the years. Keep your focus, no distractions. We will be away soon. Refocus, lets do it again - 30 Start, first 3, deep and clean - feel the water. "Paddlers, are you ready, attention please" ... "GO". You Go on the "G". 1-2-3, up, up, .. 10, up, up, .. 20, up, up, ..7,..30, reach, reach, hinge, hinge. The boat is up and running and there is something there. We are hingeing and driving through the stroke. The boat is more than running, it is been driven through the stroke like it has felt in training over last few weeks, except this time it is race intensity, not level 4, Remember this Geoff, Remember this moment. We are there next to them, where usually they pull away here, but we talked about staying connected. Give it everything to the 250m and refocus. Somehow, we are sttil there at the 250m. Refocus and reinvent yourself, I think. Drive, Drive is the call, We are still there, connected. You have a 6th sense (and good hearing) and you know without looking that our drummers are side by side. Passing the 200m start hut and the little red lane marker buoy. There is something uplifting in our Sweep's voice - "you are doing it". The lane buoys turn to red - we are 100m out. We have done everything our training has given our bodies - it's amazing to find that something extra that the sport scientists say should not be there. Mentally, prepare for the lift home. This is the most crucial part of the race - they are probably a nose ahead. We are going to have to do something amazing - something the other teams have pulled on us often over the years. "do it for the gold (or was it girls?)" is the call. We lift. We lift. The rate comes up a touch and the boat becomes light as we surge forward with every stroke - narrowing the margin. It is all clear as day, those last few strokes. You give it everything you've got when there is nothing to give. You cross the line, you hear the finish horn blast away in succussion. You look across and you know you have done it. The look in your competitors faces tell you that they know you have also done it and you take a few quiet moments to take it all in, while some of the others around you show their elation more jubilantly. Gasping for air, you touch the same knees as you did before the start. This time the "ritual" tap is to acknowledge your team mates efforts and the fact that you have done something that does not happen that often in a paddling career. "Three cheers for the other crews" is the call from our Drummer - three "hip hip". and a breathless "hooray". We bring the boats in and we all get off. Back slaps and hugs all around. Not even a second thought who won that one as you make your way through the other 180 or so paddlers you have just competed against. You smile and for some reason laugh. This kind of win does not happen that often - "take it in", "take it in" you say to yourself. You see many familiar faces as you walk through the line. They are happy for you. Many you have experienced some amazing experiences around the world in Australian Campaigns past and you hope that the journey with them will continue. Somewhere along the way you hear that we did it by five one hundredths of a second. You know the course well and you smile that you can pick such a small amount of time moments after crossing the line. What a race. You think to yourself, "it's not that we won it, it is how we won it" – it's just not what was expected by many (including yourself) and that is the beauty of dragon boat racing - the randomness and uncertainty to some extent. The boat has never felt like that out of the start and into the transition. You think to yourself, you have never paddled like that before. You feel fortunate that you took the risk to be there, you did the training, the testing, you've put yourself on the line time and time again. You have been crushed by the ramifications of defeat and oddly enough, those one or two other once in a life time victories . At the end of the day you know that it is worth the sacrifices you make to do what you have done, do and hope to do. Maybe this is not the end, but a new beginning ..
I will leave this unedited. It’s just a stream of thought that came out of my subconscious in the last 20 mins. Hope it makes sense and it will be fun to read, many year’s into the future.

Five One Hundredths of a Second - 500m Premier Opens Final - AusDBF Nats / Penrith (Fri 19 Apr 2013)

Sunday, January 23, 2011

Using the Past - Some Advice from Ken Burns, Vern Gambetta and LottieP

The following three quotes are about the past and future, and how we might relate them to each other (if that makes any sense). There is some good advice in all three quotes and I thought that I put them here for future reference, so that they will become part of my past :-). Here they are:
As you pursue your goals in life, that is to say your future, pursue your past. Let it be your guide. Insist on having a past and then you will have a future.
Ken Burns - 2004 Commencement Yale Class Day Speech (as pdf)
Vern Gambetta wisely adds:
Be careful that you are not living in the past, learn from the past, use it as a reference point.
And finally, LottieP warns:
"nostalgia is the enemy of the future"
With the past in mind I thought I would dig into archive.org and drag out something from my past (it might explain the where eljeiffel came from). Here it is:
elj.com (Eiffel Liberty): Two Years On .. by Geoff Eldridge (04 Jul 1999)

Today is Indepedence Day in the USA which celebrates the 223rd birthday, being founded on 4 Jul 1776, with the signing of the Declaration of Independence. This also represents a time of reflection for myself with elj.com (Eiffel Liberty).

It is two years ago since I registered elj.com. The name Eiffel Liberty was easy to come up with. It represented a vision and a hope for Eiffel that somehow it might be liberated from its miserable place in the language landscape (I thought how could such a great contribution, be so categorically and overwhelmingly dismissed by the programming community). Also, Emma Lazarus's words struck a chord with me, particularly

Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost, to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!
Just as America provided opportunity for many from other lands, I thought Eiffel could provide the same kind of opportunities for the syntactically and semantically battered from the other language landscapes :-)

Also, the name Eiffel Liberty made what a I thought was a nice connection between two famous landmarks that Gustave Eiffel had contributed to, being the Eiffel Tower and the Statue of Liberty "Eiffel undertook the challenge of creating the steel structure because of the enormous challenge it afforded him".

The 4 Jul 1997 was to be the launch date for the Eiffel Liberty Journal. However, I came down with a very bad cold (too many late nights preparing for the initial launch) and I decided to publish the launch issue of the Eiffel Liberty Journal, not from my newly acquired elj.com but from my progsoc web pages (this would remain the case for another six months).

It was fun putting together the first issue as I received cooperation from all I contacted. These included:Also Bertrand Meyer's classic newsgroup posting from early May 97, Avoiding the second historic mistake (I remember Bertrand once referring to this as collective hypnosis :-) gave the opportunity to publish a few articles from the newsgroup thread that ensued - eg Jeffrey Stulin's If Eiffel is so great, why isn't it popular? and Thomas Beale's Eiffel: An Industry Experience.

I was delighted when Bjarne Stroustrup allowed me to publish Why C++ is not just an Object-Oriented Programming Language and Melier Page Jones allowed me to publish Object Orientation: Making the Transition

Two years on, elj.com has changed from a random journal to a daily random news update covering the Eiffel and related worlds. In many ways elj.com is really just a log of the links and resources I have stumbled across and that I might learn from (or even get a laugh from).

Eiffel certainly enjoys a wider exposure than it did back in 1997. I hope elj.com has helped in a small way. It is hard tell what impact elj.com has had as there is little feedback. However, occasionally I do get a note saying that elj.com helped someone get started with Eiffel, which seems to make it all worthwhile. I guess elj.com could have been much more effective but there is only so much time.

For a number of reasons I renamed Eiffel Liberty to elj.com Extraordinarily Large Jumble in Feb 99 (some of the reasoning behind this was that elj.com was and still is, an Extraordinarily Large Jumble of seemingly random links and more significantly there was little or no Eiffel news). Fortunately, there now appears to be more Eiffel news than I can handle/report manually and I am making efforts to address this through a more automated Eiffel news feed at elj-daily.

elj.com has amassed an incredible amount of links, quotes and resources relating to Eiffel and related worlds. The time has come for elj.com to be able to extract the information from this mass. A keyword/search facility is on the way.

I believe that for [open source] projects to thrive, information needs to readily at hand. I hope the new elj.com that you will see over the coming weeks/months (depends on how much time I get to work on this) will reflect the ability to provide this information efficiently and effectively.

Finally, I would like to acknowledge the support that Jenny has given me over the last few years. She has had to cope (in more ways than one) with more than anyone should reasonably have to tolerate.
Funny to read this after all these years. Shows how strongly I felt about the Eiffel programming language and method (and still do, but not just as visible). I even chose to start this blog with some posts on Eiffel - not the language, but it's inspiration, the Eiffel Tower and it's creator, Gustave Eiffel.

I had better stop here as I think I might be getting a bit nostalgic. Anyway, hoping all of this might help me find the inspiration to get a future project off the ground.

Friday, July 2, 2010

Favourite Photos - Erskineville/Sydney June 2004 - Trees and Shadow

Trees and Shadow - Erskineville - Wed 16 Jun 2004 (picasa)

Just a very simple photo I like. Pass here each work day as I walk up Swanston Street to Erskineville Railway Station. In winter, when the trees lose their leaves, they project interesting shadows onto the wall of this Terrace House. The trees are now much bigger and the shadows produced are not quite the same. Have taken many shots of this wall over the years, but I have not been able to get a better shot than this first photo.

Have seen many interesting photos that play with shadows. A tribute article (9 Niv 2002) by Robert McFarlane for the late Ingeborg Tyssen helped me to start looking out for shadows. A quote from the article I liked was:

'Whenever possible I carry a loaded camera ... I react without too much thought. Rarely do I wait for a situation to resolve itself. Nor do I direct or provoke people. The important aspects are composition, texture and light.'

A nice way to look a photography and when I look at my own photographic evolution, I guess I have unknowingly tried to look for at least the same three points - 'composition, texture and light'.

Shortly after Ingeborg Tyssen death in 2002, the Art Gallery of NSW arranged a Memorial Exhibition of some her work. I was really impressed by the simplicity and effectiveness of many of her photos. Indeed, for the most part, it was about 'composition, texture and light'. I also have a copy of her book - Ingeborg Tyssen: Sydney photographs.

The following was one photo, I really enjoyed and was a great 'play' on the use of a shadow ..

Tree#55 (1983) from Tree Series (Ingeborg Tyssen)

Another photo reveals the framing trick employed ..

Tuscon/Arizona - 1982 - see here (Ingeborg Tyssen)

I can't really remember, but I expect these simple shadow photos, helped me to see many shadow photos that I have taken over the years. One humble attempt in 2007 follows:

Tree Shadow - Wilson Street/Newtown - Jul 2007(picasa)

Liked the positioning of the shadow of the tree trunk across the path segment - beautifully aligned for a random photo. Also the top of a real tree apparently growing out of a shadow and the position of the air vent. Nothing great, but I was happy and entered it in the 2007 Sydney Life photo competiion which closed a few days later (of course to no avail :-).

A few more random shadow related photos that I could easily find just now, follow:

Pyrmont Bridge - Darling Harbour/Sydney - Thu 31 Jul 2003 (picasa)


Tree Shadow - Perisher Valley - Tue 6 Jan 2004 (picasa)


Pole Shadows - Wellington/NZ - Tue 5 Nov 2002 (picasa)


Shadow (and Silohuette?) - Circular Quay/Sydney - 8 Dec 2002 (picasa)

I think one thing that has helped me think more about shadows in photography, is the strong Australian sunlight. I have found when travelling in the UK and Europe, the sun does not seem to shine as much and when it does it is not particularly strong, and the shadows don't seem to be as prevelant. In Australia, shadows are hard to avoid, so you need to work with the stronger Australian light or you just avoid taking photos at these times.

In writing this, I have just thought of photos that employ the use of the Silohuette. Will write something about this at a later stage as I have also employed the use of silohuette's in many of my photos over the years and is another aspect of photography I enjoy.

Lastly, a little Shadow Excercise I read about recently (in Paulo Coelho's 'The Pilmgrimage'). Often it is fun when walking around to look at a shadows and try and work out what it is that created the shadow. Most of the time it is reasonably obvious (as in these photos), but sometimes it can be difficult to work it out. Have fun ..

Friday, July 17, 2015

Tagliatelle Bolognese 101 and The Known Unknown - Alexandria (Fri 17Jul 2015)

Plated Up - Fuel and Courage for 35km paddle tomorrow - Alexandria (Fri 17 Jul 2015)

Now we know what Pluto looks like after knowingly not knowing for quite a while now (a great read about the significance of this here at ribbonfarm ). So on a slight less significant level, here is what I know now, that I did not knowingly know back 13 months ago...

Just on 13 months ago I found a passion for cooking. A new kitchen and a little help from Michelle and I was on my way. One of the dishes Michelle suggested was a spaghetti bolognese.

I thought that would be an easy start, so went to Google to find a recipe, as you do. This is the one I liked the most from all the ones I read back then:

I liked the authenticity of ingredients, the correctness and approval from Bologna - a place we were heading to on the way to the World Club Crews in Ravenna a few months later.

I have cooked this recipe almost every second week for a year now. And all modesty aside (you know me), the one I cooked this last Monday was perfecto, with a hand and fingers rising from my mouth.

Indeed the recipe looked simple and my first efforts did not excit me that much and I thought to myself where was I going wrong? I have learnt that a recipe is just a starting point and that to make it work and indeed, great, like anything in life, you have to experiment, listen and learn from others, take risks, knowingly or unknowingly.

These are just some of the things I have learnt:

  • I tried different ingredients from different places and found the best ones.

  • Brown onions are much better than white onions, they help give you a nice brown sauce.

  • Finely cut the carrots and celery rather than coarsely cut - a lot of experimenting to work that one out. Your preference might be different, but finely cut works best for me.

  • The cheaper the cans of tinned diced tomatoes are, the better they are.

  • A couple of diced real tomatoes add so much to a couple of cheap tins of diced tomatoes.

  • You need a good can openner.

  • Best mince is not the best for a bolognese and that a 50-50 combination of best mince and normal mince is best - a little fat goes a long way in taste and texture. I found this one out by mistake, as my usual and preferred butcher had virtually run out of best mince that day, so I topped it up with the normal mince.

  • Browning and slightly burning the Pancetta on the pan base, also adds a browness and richness to the sauce. Just keep stirring it into the olive oil as you are browning it.

  • Only add the red wine (and again cheaper the better) after the mince has been browned. Then make sure to take the time to boil it down without a lid until 30% has boiled away.

  • As suggested in the article, a big thick pasta like tagliatelle is best. Beats spaghetti and even fettuccine by a long way.

  • A little olive oil in the pasta makes it less sticky and easy to handle when serving up (Thanks to Darren and his Mum for that one).

It has taken 13 months to work all this out and I am so pleased with what I have learnt. Feel like I could enter World Bolognese Champs mentioned in the article and give it pretty good shake.

So as New Horizons speeds past Pluto into the outer Solar System and beyond, to make more of the unknown known, I will continue my quest to know more, master and perfect what I don't already know about Tagliatelle Bolognese 101.

Ready to Go - Alexandria (Mon 13 Jul 2015)

Simmeringly Good - Alexandria (Mon 13 Jul 2015)

All done... - Alexandria (Fri 17 Jul 2015)

Monday, November 8, 2010

Vale: Maurie Cowan (1960-2010) - Pride, Intensity, Passion and Power ..

To represent your country at any event is an honour that very few people achieve in their life time. I am fortunate in that I have the opportunity to do it twice in one go and so whether I'm paddling in a dragonboat or performing the haka both will be done with the same amount of pride, intensity, passion and power that they deserve. .. Maurie Cowan - Tue 05 Jul 2005 (email to Australian Dragon Boat Team)

Maurie Cowan - Performing the Haka - Maori Culture Group - Schlitz/Germany - Jul 2005


Maurie Cowan - Australian Premier Open Dragon Boat Team - Thu 04 Aug 2005

This afternoon I have learnt of the passing of Maurice Cowan (Maurie), last night after a 5 year journey with advanced prostate cancer. He was 50 years old.

Strangely enough, yesterday, I had only just thought of him and how he was going, on the way home from the Roseville Dragon Boat Regatta. 

My first memory of Maurie is from the 2004 Australian National Dragon Boat Championships in Perth in April 2004. He paddled in the NSW Masters Open Team and the Masters Mixed Team, alongside Jenny and Joanne. I remember everyone being very excited about the resulting wins, becoming National Champions and the resulting opportunity it presented to represent Australia at the IDBF World Dragon Boat Championships in Shanghai in the following October.

National Champs - Shanghai - here we come - NSW Masters Mixed Team - AusDBF 2004 National Dragon Boat Championships - Perth/WA - Fri 9 Apr 2004

National Champs - Shanghai - here we come - NSW Masters Mixed Team - AusDBF 2004 National Dragon Boat Championships - Perth/WA - Fri 9 Apr 2004 (picasa)

The NSW Masters Open, Women's and Mixed Teams then trained through the Winter of 2004 and represented Australia with great pride, intensity, passion and power in Qingpu/Shanghai in late October 2004 at the 2004 IDBF World Dragon Boat Championships.

Training Session - Australian Masters Mixed Dragon Boat Team - 2004 IDBF World Dragon Boat Championships - Qingpu/Shanghai - Mon 18 Oct 2004

Training Session - Australian Masters Open Dragon Boat Team - 2004 IDBF World Dragon Boat Championships - Qingpu/Shanghai - Mon 18 Oct 2004


Maurie would then go on to be a member of the victorious 2005 NSW Dragon Boat Team.

2005 NSW Dragon Boat Team - Maurie's up the back (as per usual) on the left - AusDBF National Dragon Boat Championships - Canberra (Fri 08 Apr 2005)

Maurie then became a member of the 2005 Australian Dragon Boat Team which competed at the World Dragon Boat Championships in Berlin. On the same trip to Germany he also represented  New Zealand in a Maori Cultural Group that performed in Schlitz. He was diagnosed with advanced prostate cancer shortly after his return from Germany that year.

Maurie is in Row 6 on the right - Australian Masters Mixed Dragon Boat 500m Team - 2005 IDBF World Dragon Boat Championships - Berlin - Fri 05 Aug 2005

The cancer and it's painful treatment did not stop him from paddling and Jenny, Joanne and I would often see him at Dragon Boat Regatta's, where he would often take the time to talk to us, and in particular Jenny. They seemed to have a special relationship and I always made sure that they had the opportunity to have some time together so that they could talk about their own Journey's with cancer in a way that only cancer survivors can truly relate to and understand.

It was not until Jenny's Flowers on the Water (FOW) Ceremony last December, that I realised how much of impression that Jenny had had on Maurie's own Journey with Cancer.

In a moving email, he wrote to me to apologise for probably not being able to attend the FOW Ceremony and to write about the inspiration Jenny had provided to him during his own Journey with Cancer. I know he would not have minded if I publish a copy of the email below. I think it truly represents his kind nature and big heart. More so, I think it gives an insight into how he dealt with the cancer and highlights his own inspiring approach to living life with advance cancer.

Also have attached a couple of photos from the 2009 Dragon Boat Nationals After Party at Kawana/Caloundra (picasa), which always put a smile on my face. Also a couple of other photos from the World Dragon Boat Championships in Berlin in 2005.

Thank you Maurie - we will remember you with very fond memories. In particular, I will remember the special friendship and bond that you had with Jenny. I know she enjoyed the little chats you had and I also know your own Journey, not only inspired Jenny, but all of those that had the pleasure of knowing you.

Regards .. Geoff

From: Maurice Cowan [moreza.cowan@??.com]
Sent: Tuesday, 1 December 2009 1:38 PM
To: Eldridge Geoff
Subject: My Inspiration

Hi Geoff,

I was very dissappointed to hear about Jenny's passing. She has been a inspiration for me for a few years now, since I first discovered my prostate cancer in 2005 after returning from the world championships in Germany. I reminded her at Caloundra how much of an inspiration she was for me (see gave me one of those big smiles), and wished her luck not knowing it would be the last time that I would see her.

I can remember her on that trip to germany, she was an inspiration to me even before I learnt of my own condition. I can remember feeling sorry for her at that time,but respected her strength and passion that she had for paddling and for life, it was inspiring.

So when I had first discovered that I had advanced prostate cancer a few months after that trip in 2005, the first person I thought of was Jenny and how she was handling herself,that really helped me to deal with my own situation pretty easily. For me it was like ok we know what it is, so lets just get on and deal with. And as long as I can still paddle I'll be fine.

So every regatta since then, I would always look for her and think she looks well whenever I saw her, so this year at Roseville, it just wasnt the same without her there.

She still remains an inspiration for me as I continue my own battle. Unfortunately my pain levels vary from day to day from comfortable to very painful. I am hoping to come to bank st, but I hope that you will understand if I cant.

Regardless I will be thinking of Jenny during that time, I will always remember my friend with the big smile on her face and a huge heart, who has made such a huge impression on me.

kindest regards,
Maurie


Jo, Maurie and Jenny - 2009 Australian Dragon Boat Nationals - Kawana - 26 Apr 2009 (picasa)

Jenny and Maurie - Inspirational - Big Smiles and Huge Hearts - 2009 Australian Dragon Boat Nationals - Kawana - 26 Apr 2009  (picasa)

Maurie is in Row 6 on the left - Australian Premier Open Dragon Boat Team - 1000m - Thu 04 Aug 2005

Team Huddle (Maurie is on the left, Mark Madden, Geoff Eldridge, Vivianne Bustos, Cynthia Kupier, George Louie, Toni, Peter Richardson and Jon Taylor (who passed away from Prostate Cancer in Dec 2008) - Australian Senior Mixed Dragon Boat Team - Berlin - Sun 07 Aug 2005