Not Enough and Jump (encore) - Van Halen - David Letterman - 1995 (youtube)

Not Enough (more) and Jump (encore) - Van Halen - David Letterman Show 1995 (youtube)
Always try to find a Letterman live performance whenever I put a music video here. Was hoping to find Jump (heard it on the radio yesterday for the time in many years) but ended up with this beautiful song, Not Enough. And believe it or not, there is small encore for the last 50 seconds where they play Jump.

Not Enough Lyrics

To love somebody naturally
To love somebody faithfully
To love somebody equally
Is not enough, it's not enough
It's not enough

To love somebody secretly (And never touch)
To love somebody honestly (And always trust)
To love somebody tenderly
The tender touch is not enough
It's not enough

Love hurts you sometimes
It's not so easy to find, no
Searchin' everywhere, you turn and swear (Ahh-ahh-ahh)
It's always been there

To love somebody foolishly
(Can happen once)
To love somebody hopelessly
(It hurts so much)
To love somebody equally
Is not enough, it's not enough
It's not enough

Love takes a little time
It's not so easy to find, no, no
Searchin' everywhere, you turn and swear
It's always been there

(Guitar Solo)
Standin' there....

Oh!

And if it don't come easily
One thing you must believe
You can always have trust in me
'Cause my heart will always be yours honestly

Yeah! Love hurts you sometimes
Not so easy to find, no-oh
Searchin' everywhere, you turn and swear (Ahh-ahh-ahh)
It's always been there, standin' there
Love hurts you sometimes
It's not yours, it's not mine, no-oh
Love is only to share
You turn and swear (Ahh-ahh-ahh) it's everywhere
Standin' there (Ahh-ahh)
'Cause it's always been there

I wish you enough - Paulo Coelho (14 Feb 2011)

From I wish you enough - Paulo Coelho (14 Feb 2011)  

‘When we said, ‘I wish you enough,’ we were wanting the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them.’

Then turning toward me, he shared the following as if he were reciting it from memory.

•  I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright no matter how gray the day may appear.
 

•  I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun even more..


•  I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive and everlasting.


•  I wish you enough pain so that even the smallest of joys in life may appear bigger.


• I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting…


• I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.
 

• I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good- bye.

Favourite Photos: Shanghai/China 2010 - Expo 2010 Volunteer

Expo 2010 Volunteer - Green - Shanghai/China - Tue 05 May 2010 (picasa)
Like another Favourite Photo - The Bookends of Fowey (see below or click through here for more detail on these types of photos), I could not get my camera out quick enough to get this one. Just another really simple colour photo.

Just back from Australian Dragon Boat Nationals in Adelaide (4 days around Anzac Weekend) and Asian Dragon Boat Championships in Wujin (near Wuxi and Shanghai, a bit further east) from 30 April to 2 May 2010. We were fortunate enough to have a day at Expo 2010 (being held in Shanghai) during the opening week.

Bookends of Fowey - Blue - Fowey / Cornwall (UK) - 09 Sep 2009 (picasa)

On How to Get There - Yesterday's Suffering, Today's Inspiration, Tomorrow's Strength

God Still Loves You!!! I Love You, Also - Valletta / Malta (Sat 20 Sep 2014)

How to Get There
By Michael Leunig

Go to the end of the path until you get to the gate.
Go through the gate and head straight out
Towards the horizon
Keep going towards the horizon
Sit down and have a rest every now and again
But keep on going.
Just keep with it.
Keep on going as far as you can
That's how you get there.

.. And that is pretty much what I have done these last 5 years ..

These words have implicitly (I knew of them and their meaning before I even read them for the first time) and explicitly guided me when I was completely lost, and without Purpose and Hope .. "Just keep with it" I would say. And it's a pretty good approach to Life, I would think, given the Situation I found myself ..

At some point along the way you do get "There" - it's not overly obvious that you have arrived, but somehow you know .. just like when you were made aware of how far you had fallen without even noticing.

Now ..

You are strong enough to stand on your own two feet and embrace the world again. You are brave enough to start "letting go", to know there is more to "let go", and more importantly to know that is what Jenny would want of me. To know you have another chance. That what forced you to go "through the gate and head straight out" and where you have been to get "There", has made you a better person - and to know that I should not feel guilty about that. That you have been all over and its been all over you. That you are not a Hopeless case. That you are Awesome. That you are still here for a reason. That you know you still have so much to give. That it was not the End, like you thought, but just the chance for another Beginning.

A chance to show you are resilent. A chance to show you can change, adapt and reinvent yourself. A chance to demonstrate you can think of yourself as a survivor and not a victim of circumstance and Life. A chance to consider that you have been lucky to have shared loved. And through that love, empowered to live life to the full along the path you were destined to walk.

Thank you to everyone that have helped me to get "There" these last 5 years. It has been a remarkable Journey and a few Lessons in Life have been learnt!!! I can’t really believe where I have been. I could write a book about it but at least there is a blog - eljeiffel.blogspot.com.au

This is Life (my Life actually) and I have learnt we need to Live and appreciate it while we can. Jenny showed and gave me this. It was her gift to me ..

Why do I write this now? I write this for me and my timeline. And while it might appear a little self-indulgent, I have no regrets - it is who I have become along the way to "There".

More importantly I write it for others who are or will walk "out through the gate" and search for their "There". It's a choice you make and I know you can do it if you set your heart to it.

I know there is further to go but my outlook is different now.

“There” is always Hope - I am another shining example of this!!

Thanks again.

Yesterday's Suffering, Today's Inspiration, Tomorrow's Strength
Geoff (Wed 25 Feb 2015)

A Journey, A Home - My Legacy to the World - Alexandria (Sun 22 Feb 2015)

On Photography - Jorg Colberg (Mon 01 Jul 2013)

Untitled - Barcelona (Thu 08 Aug 2013)
Jorg Colberg (*) writes On Photography (*):

When telling a story with photographs, the idea is not to tell the actual, completely convincing story. Photography simply can’t do that. What it can do, however, is to tell a story that has enough holes in it for us to believe it, a story that lacks enough specificity to be believable – just like life, which, after all, usually is one somewhat messy, not so obvious affair

via Visualizing the past: Ulrike Schmitz (*) by Jorg Colberg (*).

Musical Mural (1 of 2) - Boulevard de Maisonneuve Est / Montreal (Thu 25 Aug 2011)

Musical Mural (1 of 2) - Boulevard de Maisonneuve Est / Montreal (Thu 25 Aug 2011)
Just missed the guy, in the foreground carrying the violin (you have to look close), coming out of the door. Would have been nice to have isolated there, but just was not fast enough. Saw it but did not react fast enough (*).

Favourite Photos - Newtown 2007 - King Street - 'Communication'

Communication - King Street, Newtown, Sydney - Wed 14 Mar 2007 (picasa)
Second photo from a collection of favourite photos.

I had been to the Dendy Cinema to see a movie a few days earlier and was struck by the light and this scene when I left around 6pm. The late afternoon light in Sydney is beautiful this time of the year - interestingly enough it is almost 3 years ago to the day this photo was taken. Unfortunately I did not have my camera with me at this time, so I made a mental note to come back at some stage in the near future - which would turn out to be just a few days later.

On the day this photo was captured, I had taken a half day off work, in the afternoon, so that I could attend one of Jenny's medical appointments at St George Hospital. I was in my car on the way to meet Jenny and Joanne for the appointment when Jenny called to say that the appointment had been cancelled due to unforseen circumstances and that we should meet at Dragon Boat training that night back in the City.

I had a few hours to spare, so I thought I would go back to Newtown and have a coffee at Urban Bites (a favourite haunt for me, but the opposite end of King Street to the Dendy) for a coffee. When I was there I remembered the photo I wanted to take and I realised I had my camera. Decided to take the 10 min walk back to the Dendy to take this photo which had similar lighting to what I had seen a few days earlier.

I guess what I like about this particular photo is the composition. I only took a couple of photos and really did not look at it closely until I downloaded it to my computer. There I could see all the detail - things I really had not noticed when I took it.

I saw all the signs - things telling us what to do (the "No Stopping" and "No Entry" signs [1], "One Way" and parking signs), and the signs that identify things. For instance the Map of Africa and all the countries identified, the graffiti tag and the nice frame around the Map, the number plates that identify the motor bikes and scooters, etc.

A couple of other things I liked were the:

1. Pole Poster where you see the word "Pixels" - the smallest element of each digital photo - you can see it between the "No Entry" Sign and the white pillar (might have to look at the large version to notice).
   
   
2. Person in the centre of the photo - particularly his position and the shadow area of the background he fills as well his position between the foreground shadows. I also love the tattoos on his arms and legs, and the fact that he is communicating with someone using his Mobile Phone. His T-Shirt and bag have some text and logos on them. Also like how the shadow of the Bike Rack just catches his foot - I did get lucky [2] in many ways, as there is no way I could have planned all of this.
   

As you can see, many things can found in a simple photo that is captured in a fraction of a section. It is also interesting how circumstances sometime conspire to allow a photo to be taken.

I entered this photo in the 2007 Sydney Life Competition (unfortunately can't find an archive of the official page though I found a media release here). I always try each year to make an entry to the competition as it is open to all photographers, though it is virtually impossible for non-established photographers to make the final 22-26 images. Will keep trying though :-)

There is another story about this location which will come in another favourite photo at a later date.

[1] I would always say to Jenny a good photo always has a little bit of red in it and this is a theme you will see in many of my photos.

[2] Also would often tell Jenny, there was a lot of luck in taking photos (though like all things involving luck, you often make you own luck) and that if you take enough photos you are bound to end up with a few your like (i.e. keepers).

Five One Hundredths of a Second - 500m Premier Opens Final - AusDBF Nats / Penrith (Fri 19 Apr 2013)

Five One Hundredths of a Second - 500m Premier Opens Final - AusDBF Nats / Penrith (Fri 19 Apr 2013)
Once, twice or, maybe three times (if you are fortunate enough and willing to take the risks) in a paddling career you do something unbelievable. Something you just can’ t explain, though sometimes it worth giving it a try. Here goes ..

You are happy you have made the major final. You know you are up against strong teams. The favourite, the team directly on your left, you have not beaten in three years. In fact you have not been within a boat length, over 500m, for the last two years. Against the odds, and your failing self-confidence, you still somehow believe that we can still get across the line first. To be part of of something great. There is always hope at the start. It is a chance to create who you want to be. You don't get your hopes up too high, as you have been disappointed in the past. You don't think about all of this too much at this point. The focus is putting your best race on the water and seeing how it compares to the others when you have all crossed the line. You are not overly nervous, but you are excited and proud to be there. A supportive and encouraging tap on the knee for those around you. Remember it is a 30 stroke start. Just focus on the first 3 strokes and take it one by one from there. Clean water. Hand out of the water. Blade buried. Make sure you feel and stay connected with the water with every stroke. The starter aligns us and we ready. "Paddlers, are you ready, attention please" .... the gun does not fire for some reason. This has happened a few time before over the years. Keep your focus, no distractions. We will be away soon. Refocus, lets do it again - 30 Start, first 3, deep and clean - feel the water. "Paddlers, are you ready, attention please" ... "GO". You Go on the "G". 1-2-3, up, up, .. 10, up, up, .. 20, up, up, ..7,..30, reach, reach, hinge, hinge. The boat is up and running and there is something there. We are hingeing and driving through the stroke. The boat is more than running, it is been driven through the stroke like it has felt in training over last few weeks, except this time it is race intensity, not level 4, Remember this Geoff, Remember this moment. We are there next to them, where usually they pull away here, but we talked about staying connected. Give it everything to the 250m and refocus. Somehow, we are sttil there at the 250m. Refocus and reinvent yourself, I think. Drive, Drive is the call, We are still there, connected. You have a 6th sense (and good hearing) and you know without looking that our drummers are side by side. Passing the 200m start hut and the little red lane marker buoy. There is something uplifting in our Sweep's voice - "you are doing it". The lane buoys turn to red - we are 100m out. We have done everything our training has given our bodies - it's amazing to find that something extra that the sport scientists say should not be there. Mentally, prepare for the lift home. This is the most crucial part of the race - they are probably a nose ahead. We are going to have to do something amazing - something the other teams have pulled on us often over the years. "do it for the gold (or was it girls?)" is the call. We lift. We lift. The rate comes up a touch and the boat becomes light as we surge forward with every stroke - narrowing the margin. It is all clear as day, those last few strokes. You give it everything you've got when there is nothing to give. You cross the line, you hear the finish horn blast away in succussion. You look across and you know you have done it. The look in your competitors faces tell you that they know you have also done it and you take a few quiet moments to take it all in, while some of the others around you show their elation more jubilantly. Gasping for air, you touch the same knees as you did before the start. This time the "ritual" tap is to acknowledge your team mates efforts and the fact that you have done something that does not happen that often in a paddling career. "Three cheers for the other crews" is the call from our Drummer - three "hip hip". and a breathless "hooray". We bring the boats in and we all get off. Back slaps and hugs all around. Not even a second thought who won that one as you make your way through the other 180 or so paddlers you have just competed against. You smile and for some reason laugh. This kind of win does not happen that often - "take it in", "take it in" you say to yourself. You see many familiar faces as you walk through the line. They are happy for you. Many you have experienced some amazing experiences around the world in Australian Campaigns past and you hope that the journey with them will continue. Somewhere along the way you hear that we did it by five one hundredths of a second. You know the course well and you smile that you can pick such a small amount of time moments after crossing the line. What a race. You think to yourself, "it's not that we won it, it is how we won it" – it's just not what was expected by many (including yourself) and that is the beauty of dragon boat racing - the randomness and uncertainty to some extent. The boat has never felt like that out of the start and into the transition. You think to yourself, you have never paddled like that before. You feel fortunate that you took the risk to be there, you did the training, the testing, you've put yourself on the line time and time again. You have been crushed by the ramifications of defeat and oddly enough, those one or two other once in a life time victories . At the end of the day you know that it is worth the sacrifices you make to do what you have done, do and hope to do. Maybe this is not the end, but a new beginning ..

I will leave this unedited. It’s just a stream of thought that came out of my subconscious in the last 20 mins. Hope it makes sense and it will be fun to read, many year’s into the future.

Five One Hundredths of a Second - 500m Premier Opens Final - AusDBF Nats / Penrith (Fri 19 Apr 2013)

The Hawkesbury Canoe Classic

"To accomplish great things, we must not only act but also dream, not only plan but also believe." - Anatole France

Joanne, Jenny and Geoff - Hawkesbury Canoe Classic 2006 - Windsor - Sat 28 Oct 2006 (picasa)
In 2006, Jenny, Joanne (Jenny's younger identical twin) and myself (Jenny's husband) decided to do the Hawkesbury Canoe Classic (HCC) with our paddling club, Pacific Dragons. By mid June 2006, there was enough interest to enter three mixed OC6's crews.

At the time we, along with a number of other PD's paddlers (see picasa), some who were also paddling the HCC, had also been selected to represent Australia at the 2006 Asian Dragon Boat Championships in Macau in late Sep 2006 (see picasa). It was great campaign and we even learnt how to paddle and race standing up.

On our return, via Singapore for a Breast Cancer Survivor Dragon Boat Regatta for Jenny, we had about four weeks to prepare for the HCC. Our team comprised of 5 paddlers from the Macau Campaign (Mandy, Nicci, Jenny, Joanne and Geoff) and Paul who would do the majority of our steering. We were commonly referred to as the Macau Crew, but we decided to call ourselves Team Happy for our team entry application, as we were a happy bunch of paddlers. We were in it for fun and we did have a whole 13 hours of fun and finished strongly standing up.

A year later, I was asked 3 days before the 2007 HCC to fill a seat, in a Mixed OC6, that had become vacant due to a paddler injury. They were called the Red Devil's and had been training seriously for months. They wanted to have fun, but they also wanted to break the Mixed OC6 record, which they did. I was pleased to help out at such short notice and have fond memories of the crew and night (see picasa). Jenny and Joanne even came to the start line to wave us off (picasa). It was a nice surprise as I was not expecting them to come out because of a Breast Cancer Seminar they attended that day in the City.

Sadly, we lost Jenny on Tue 30 Jun 2009. Joanne and I have tried to live fulfilling lives, something that Jenny wanted for us. We have paddled in her memory and honour. She inspires and guides us from above. It is barely 12 months, and we already have some great memories.

The Climb - Jenny's Amazing Climb (more here)
In 2009, Joanne and I did not paddle the HCC. We had only just returned from Europe after the 2009 World Dragon Boat Championships. I was able help out at quite few training sessions towards the end, and Joanne and I went to the start line to wave the PD's Mixed OC12 crew off (picasa). Lisa has some great recollections of her experience (see Part: 1, 2 and 3).

In 2010, Jo and I will paddle the HCC.

Shortly after Jenny's passing, the 2009, Prague bound, Australian Dragon Boat Squad presented Jo and I with a gift in Jenny's memory. It was a Star, located in the southern sky, named In the Memory of Jenny Petterson in the Constellation of Vela. Vela is latin for Sail and the star was picked because of the Constellation's water themed name.

Jenny, believed the 2006 HCC was an experience that created life time memories, which it surly does, as anyone who has paddled the HCC will tell you. She fondly recalled (see more further below):

It was such a great experience under a sky filled with thousands of stars.

It is something that we will be able to look back on for the rest of our lives.

So when it came time to name our 2010 Mixed OC6 (Charlotte, Rachel, Jo, Alasdair, Graeme and Geoff) Team, I tried to think of a name that allowed us to remember Jenny and to inspire us. It had to be Team ?? following our 2006 tradition. It did not take long to come up with Team Vela which I think allows us recognise the past, present and future.

I hope this goes some way to explaining the name - Team Vela.

This post includes some photos and recollections from the 2006 HCC, as well as a couple of inspirational quotes.

We will remember Jenny as we paddle under a thousand stars. In particular, we will remember Jenny and the star named in Jenny's Memory in the Constellation of Vela as it shines down brightly upon us from the southern sky.

Go Team Vela! - the most fantastic team on the Hawkesbury!!!!

Regards .. Geoff

Joanne, Jenny and Geoff - Hawkesbury Canoe Classic 2006 - Windsor - Sat 28 Oct 2006 (picasa)
Jenny writes about the Hawkesbury Canoe Classic ..

On our return from Macau a routine CT scan showed that I had an accumulation of fluid around my lung. I had it drained so I was able to take part in the Hawkesbury Canoe Classic. This is an 111 kilometre race from Windsor to Brooklyn along the Hawkesbury River. All types of craft including kayaks, canoes, outrigger canoes and surf skis take part in the race. It was a fantastic experience. I was a member of a six person team who paddled an outrigger canoe. Geoff and Jo were also in the team. We set off at 6pm and paddled through the night arriving 13 hours later. It was such a great experience under a sky filled with thousands of stars.

Pacific Dragons Crews and Supporters - Hawkesbury Canoe Classic 2006 - Windsor - Sat 28 Oct 2006 (picasa)
Jenny and Joanne - Hawkesbury Canoe Classic 2006 - Windsor - Sat 28 Oct 2006 (picasa)
From A Familiar Path by Doug Miller (more here) ..

"A single step repeated hundreds and thousands of times would see us eventually arrive at the end. It did not take superhuman strength or a talent that most do not have. It took a steadfast commitment. Step by step, the miles added up and the challenges slipped by. Today just like those days on the trail, is another step. Tomorrow is yet another. I walk this journey in anticipation of the end, but I also know that there is much to learn in the process. It is the process, no matter what the hardship where great beauty and adventure can be found."

Sunrise - Hawkesbury Canoe Classic 2006 - Hawkesbury River - Sun 29 Oct 2006 (picasa)
Sunrise - Hawkesbury Canoe Classic 2006 - Hawkesbury River - Sun 29 Oct 2006 (picasa)
From the Manual for Climbing Mountains by Paulo Coelho ..

Respect your soul: don’t keep repeating "I’m going to make it". Your soul already knows that, what it needs is to use the long journey to be able to grow, stretch along the horizon, touch the sky. An obsession does not help you at all to reach your objective, and even ends up taking the pleasure out of the climb. But pay attention: also, don’t keep saying "it’s harder than I thought", because that will make you lose your inner strength.

Team Happy - Geoff, Jenny, Mandy, Jo, Nicci and Paul - Hawkesbury Canoe Classic 2006 - Brooklyn - Sun 29 Oct 2006 (picasa)
Sarah and Gav - Hawkesbury Canoe Classic 2006 - Brooklyn - Sun 29 Oct 2006 (picasa)
Gav wrote on Mon 30 Oct 2006 ..

PDs, There are some very inspirational people in this club. They won't jump out at you, and they won't tell you about it - but if you stop, look and listen you will see immense courage, inner strength, and team work mixed in with a joke and a smile.

3 PD OC6s + Claire on her ski, showed some true grit on the weekend by finishing the Hawkesbury, and in good time. Each paddler taking 40,000 strokes through the night (give or take a couple).

For a race so long, you can't start the race with the mind set and strength you need to finish it. It's impossible. You have to find it along the way. Brutal mind games that get played out as the kms tick over.

The paddlers have to dig deeper and deeper in themselves in order to keep going and enduring the pain and extreme fatigue.

In the darkness, they imagine the sweet sweet moment at the finish line where they realise their goal of conquering the distance, and finally allowing their bodies to stop.

Sometimes it feels like it is getting further away. But when it finally, actually, really happens - PADDLES OUT- the sense of achievement mixed with relief is overwhelming and pure ecstasy.

Tears, smiles and hugs all round.

After the Hawkesbury, your concept of distance and yourself changes forever. From then on, you are never again afraid of 'not being able to finish' a race. It is now just a question of how hard you can go.

Well done to the 'Amazing 18' !!! May we all be made of the same stuff.

There is only one way to find out.

Joanne and Jenny - Hawkesbury Canoe Classic 2006 - Brooklyn - Oct 2006 (picasa)
On Wed 1 Nov 2006, Jenny wrote ..

Thank you all so much for the wonderful experience. It was unbelievable and seems like a bit of a dream now. It was truly an honour to be a part of Team Happy. It is something that we will be able to look back on for the rest of our lives.

We cannot thank you Gav, Sarah, Tamara and Luke (and for that matter, all of the other land crews) enough for all the support you gave us. You all made things so easy for us and looked after us soooo well. We could never have done it without you. From helping us on and off the boat, keeping us warm, feeding us, helping us change and massaging our weary bodies. You are the best!

Go Team Happy! - the most fantastic team on the Hawkesbury!!!!

Bye for now,
Jo, Geoff and Jenny

Don't wonder "What If?" - Jenny P - Our Guiding Light and Inspiration

On Introspection - William Deresiewicz (Oct 2009)

Untitlted - Zurich (Thu 25 Sep 2014)

William Deresiewicz on Introspection:

Introspection means talking to yourself, and one of the best ways of talking to yourself is by talking to another person. One other person you can trust, one other person to whom you can unfold your soul. One other person you feel safe enough with to allow you to acknowledge things—to acknowledge things to yourself — that you otherwise can’t. Doubts you aren’t supposed to have, questions you aren’t supposed to ask. Feelings or opinions that would get you laughed at by the group or reprimanded by the authorities.

This is what we call thinking out loud, discovering what you believe in the course of articulating it.

via Solitude and Leadership by William Deresiewicz.

Tom Williams with his Photo "Father and Daughter on a Bicycle" - Sydney Life 2004 / Hyde Park (Wed 13 Oct 2004)

Tom Williams (*) with Father and Daughter on a Bicycle - Sydney Life 2004 (*) / Hyde Park (Wed 13 Oct 2004)
Went to photograph the large scale photos in the Park at lunchtime and saw Tom hovering around the area. I knew who he was as i had seen him speak about his photograph the previous Saturday. The filtered light through the trees was magnificent and I asked to Tom to pose in front of his photo. He was a bit bemused but was kind enough to agree to my request and positioning instructions (how bold was I back then). This is what turned out. I like it, particularly the light. This photo has been siting in the archive for over eight years now and I am glad I did have a look through it the other day.

On Street Photography - Haris P / Eric Kim (Sun 23 Feb 2014)

Street Portrait - Oxford Street / London (Sat 17 Aug 2013)
Haris P (*) writes On Street Photography (*):

[..] tips I would give street photographers would be the following:

1. Search for the light (*),


2. Search for the place (*),


3. Search for the character(s) (*),


4. Wait for the moment (*)..

And if you find all these things– don’t be satisfied with mediocrity.

Not-ordinary photos are nice but not enough. Extra-ordinary (*) photos are your target.

via Photographs are Everywhere: The Extra-Ordinary Street Photography of Haris P (Xaris P) (*) by Eric Kim (*).

On Failure - I Wrote this for You (Tue 30 Jun 2015)

Self Portrait - The Photographer - Ultimo (Wed 01 Jul 2015)

I Wrote this for You on Failure:

You fail with your heart on your sleeve.

You fail like you mean it with every part of you.

You fail attempting the impossible and the ridiculous.

You fail in front of others and you fail and they laugh at you and you fail and you feel nothing and regret less.

You fail sincerely and earnestly and you risk everything at every opportunity.

This is how you fail: You fail beautifully. You fail with grace.

via The Millions Ways To Fail by I Wrote this for You.

An amazing piece of writing. Passionate, powerful and, oddly enough, incredibly Inspiring. To be a must, and often read post.

On Tears - Iain S. Thomas

Tears and Comfort - Park Guell / Barcelona (Thu 08 Aug 2013)

Iain S. Thomas on Hope and Love:

I hope every tear you ever cry makes you feel a little bit better

via 300 Things [here by Iain S. Thomas].

While I have shed a tear just about everyday for what has been lost - a life, a love, a relationship and a future - I have only shed them to myself. There have only been two times since Jenny died that this has not been the case.

The first time was at the end of the day of Jenny's Funeral. The others headed upstairs when we arrived home that cold winter's evening. I stayed downstairs and went into one of the rooms, closed the door and in the darkness curled up on the floor under the desk and let out a howl that I had not heard before or since. The others came down and comforted me. I had broken down after a week of being brave and doing what I had to do. The other time is for another day but would happen a few months later in a small town in the south of France.

You go through stages and when you stop shedding tears for a time, you wonder if you are forgetting or your heart has just turned to stone. Invariably, something happens - a person, an event, an anniversary but mostly a song - and the tears flow again and you feel better. There is no need to be comforted. I am strong enough to shed them on my own. They are mine only and I find comfort in them because that's what they are for, to make you feel better.

Live, Work, Create. - Ramercy / New York (Wed 17 Aug 2011)

Live, Work, Create. - Ramercy / New York (Wed 17 Aug 2011)
Knew I photographed this for a reason. It seems to say what might motivate me to post here. Also makes me think of creative people such as Steve Jobs who sadly passed away from pancreatic cancer yesterday.

Like many from his generation (he was about 5.5 yearrs older than me), I have lived through and watched the development, release and have used the products from the very beginning of personal computing.

I now type this on one of his innovations, an iPad sitting on a train on my daily commute - who would ever thought that all those years ago when I was still at school. Well, Steve did and through hard work he motivated a company which was fortunate enough to be the first to convert a dream into a reality for us - the masses.

His passing has touched many, including those who were not hugh fans of the Apple worshipping and hysteria that Steve was so good at creating at product releases and conferences.

It is always sad when someone passes away so young, but this was his destiny, just as Jenny had her own destiny and for all of us for that matter.

I feel some empathy towards Steve's Family and it is all in front of them, though I don't believe that Steve's passing was unexpected. Hopefully, they had their chances to say goodbye (*).

No matter what people thought of him, he was a great innovator, leader, businessman and he was never afraid of taking a risk or failure.

Lots of online tributes have popped all over the web.

Found a commencement speech (*) Steve made back in 2005 (*) at Stanford University. The last few paragraphs are very touching and worth remembering here for me ..

You can tell he has confronted his own mortality.

Maybe this is what I would like to remember from Steve’s Speech ..

Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life.

Don't be trapped by dogma, which is living with the results of other people's thinking.

Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice, heart and intuition.

They somehow already know what you truly want to become.

Everything else is secondary.

Steve Jobs, 14 Jun 2005, Stanford Commencement Speech.

Thanks Steve, your legacy has allowed me to ..

Live, Work, Create

Be Audacious - Ravenna 2014

Home (*) - Blackwattle Bay / Sydney (Sun 24 Aug 2014)
Creature of habit, but I like this routine. Always go to Blackwattle Bay on the last Sunday before we leave to compete. I walk, take a few photos (*), read, think and reflect. And this time I wrote something, so here it is ..

I’ve been thinking lately about how every year seems to be different. It's natural. With time, things do change and I thought that this was the only reason things appeared to change. But you know what, even if everything did stay the same, it is still different, because you are different. You see things differently because you are a year older and all that goes with that, if you are doing something with your life.

With that rather random introduction (but I think there might be something in it), I thank everyone at Pacific Dragons for making Ravenna 2014 (*) happen.

How does such a small club get itself half way across the world to compete against the best clubs in the world?

It takes a thought, a dream, a goal, some intention, commitment and dedication. That's part of what it takes and the Club has lots of this and all the other things needed to be competing at our 4th consecutive World Club Crew Championships. I thank you all.

So with another candle on the cake, and with two sessions to go, I've come to love and appreciate this part of the campaign. I’ve been thinking lately:

• You know you are being coached by the best in the world - I told the boys this at the AB when we met in Feb this year, that alone is a good enough reason to buy in on the campaign.


• You feel fit and you know the effort is paying off – a conversion and gelling process is happening. After 70 or so water sessions, we are doing some really intense sets now. Things you just could not do, even a few months ago – and you thought were pretty good back then


• It’s scary but you love it.


• More so now, it’s not just what you are doing, it’s what you are thinking, what you believe.


• It’s not just to do your best, but to go beyond that and to give it everything.


• It’s not just for you, but for everyone who has loved, supported and helped you to get to this point.

Finally, going back to where it all began for most of us this campaign, I was asked in front of the Group, at the AB, that night back in Feb:

What is it like to be a World Champion?

I did not know what to say (and it was the reason I sent out that Five One Hundreths of Second (*) Post on FB after the meeting). And, I'm not sure that it is even the right question, but I did say something like this:

It's one step at a time. It is great to feel like you are in the game. You can’t expect to win, it’s not your fate or destiny to win and you definitely can’t just hope to win. You have to try. And you have to have confidence and belief in yourself, your support network and your team. [1]

and with that I concluded:

Be Audacious!!! [1]

And, so I am and so I think we all should be ..

Regards .. Geoff

[1] the essence of these thoughts came from a great blog post (*) I had just read at that time by a Canadian Olympic Kayaker, Adam Van Koeverden (*). For me, he is Canada’s Drew Ginn (*), both who are inspirations to me.

Exposure is a Creative Tool, not a Right or Wrong - Matt Kees (Sat 22 Sep 2001)

Underexposed? - Sydney (Tue 31 Jul 2001)
Matt Kees (*) was kind enough to give me few words of advice (*) regarding exposure ..

exposure is a creative tool, not a right or wrong. This picture is correctly exposed for what you were going for.

A few words of wisdom that have stayed with me since. Thanks Matt.

Knowing you, knowing me - Urbanbites / King Street / Newtown (Sun 29 Nov 2015)

Knowing you, knowing me - Urbanbites / King Street / Newtown (Sun 29 Nov 2015)

Up early for a big day. Decide to go get a coffee, but the local coffee shops wont be open until 8am, so decide to go up to the coffee shop you lived in for the first six months after Jenny's passing. It was frequented many times in the subsequent years and many fond memories with family, friends and mostly, myself, in my thoughts that the place nurtured. If I could write, I could write a book about the place and what I felt and experienced there. Many of the early blog posts implicitly encapsulate this, so I am glad to have made the effort.

It is over 12 months since I have been here and when I arrived just after 7 this morning, I sat and noticed the small changes that a prolonged separation facilitates and makes so obvious. I noticed the staff. Many were the same, which says a lot for the place which becomes incredibly busy later in the day and night.

I am served by a young waiter I know by face. He has been here for as long as I can remember. We don't know each others names but we know each enough to know each other even after 12 months of not seeing or even thinking each other.

You are touched when he remembers to ask before I can say what he is just about to say "large flat white?". "Thanks, that would be perfect" I said, "you remembered". He smiled and then proceeded on his way to make sure my coffee arrived to please me as best he could.

This is the second time in a week you have experienced something like this. And you wonder how and why?

You've walked through life trying your hardest not to be noticed, for that is where a shy person finds refuge and comfort. However, it's moments like this that make you realise that you do exist and in some ways touch people. Maybe it is because you touch people by just being there in the corner, trying your hardest to not be noticed ...

"Knowing you, knowing me" as the ABBA Classic goes ..

On Effort and Coaching - Dan Coyle (Fri 13 Dec 2013)

Blackwattle Bay / Sydney (Sun 07 Jul 2013)
Dan Coyle (*) writes On Effort (*) and On Coaching (*):

I think the lessons for teachers and coaches are pretty simple:

• First, connect: like John Wooden said, they can’t care (*) how much you know (*) until they know how much you care (*).


• Highlight the group: seek ways (traditions, mantras, fun little rituals) to show what it means to belong in your crew.


• Don’t soft-pedal high standards. Don’t pretend that it’s easy — do the opposite.


• Emphasize the toughness (*) of the task, and your belief (*) that they have what it takes.

via The Simple Phrase that Increases Effort 40% (*) by Dan Coyle (*).

I think Dan is exactly right. I have been fortunate enough to experience this time and time again in my paddling.

"That is my life story up until now" - Remembering Jenny (Mon 06 Jul 2009)

The cackle of a Laughing Kookaburra announces the first light of dawn as the sun rose on that cold winters day. With no sleep that night preparing for Jenny's Funeral later in the day, I penned these words to honour Jenny's Life at her Funeral. Six and half years later, looking back at what came out in those last few hours, I am happy. What strikes me most is how I chose to "reflect on the little things". And they are what I miss most. Here it is ..

Jennifer Joy Petterson
24 Mar 1962 - 30 Jun 2009
Age 47 years 3 months and 6 days

"That is my life story up until now."

This is how Jenny ended her "Autobiography" written in 5th class (being 1972). I always enjoyed reading this lengthy account (it had 3 three parts) of Jenny's life up to the age of 10. I loved this story and scanned the original into my computer so that I could read it during a quiet moment at work.

Jenny was the eldest identical twin daughter of Norm and Margaret Petterson of Holt Road, Sylvania. With feet eagerly pressing on Jenny's back at the birth, a younger sister followed 5 minutes after Jenny's arrival. This was her identical twin sister Joanne. She was ready to play and from that time on they were inseparable. On the day of their birth Jenny writes there was a fete at the hospital. Jenny would always tell me that Norm bought a wind up koala at the fete that played music. For some reason she did not write this

The Autobiography, even at the age of 10, shows that Jenny had an eye for detail, as this quote reveals.

"At the age of 4 years and 10 months and 15 days we started school and cried when mummy left us."

It documents many facts and figures - birth weights and lengths, when they first walked, where they holidayed and details such as the colour of the caravans they stayed in - all well recorded for prosperity.

They participated in many sporting activities (which has been a constant throughout Jenny's life) - swimming, physie, jazz ballet, and little athletics, to mention a few.

Furthermore, she recalls the date of their first hair cut. - and even allowing me to determine that her first tooth fell out on my 7th birthday .

More generally what can be summarized from the autobiography is that Jenny had a fun filled, active childhood with her sister Joie and friends, which was encouraged and fostered by their loving parents.

Even as babies there seemed to be an order to things and this became even more apparent once they started to talk (yes that date is also recorded). In Part 1 of Jenny's Autobiography:

"One the 3rd Oct 1964 we had our first haircut and Joie said, 'Denny First', meaning Jenny first".

Jenny even then was a stabilizing influence on Joanne.

As stated above Jenny finishes her "Autobiography" with:

"That is my life story up until now."

Obviously she looks forward to the future and how she will fit into the world as she grows up. In recent years these words struck a chord with me. Today, these words have even greater meaning.

Jenny and Jo progressed to Sylvania High. They started part time work at Grace Bros’, Miranda Fair. Jo in "Cosmetics and Womens Clothing" and Jenny in "Hardware and Gardening" - "Same, Same but Different". I often asked Jenny to recall these days and I would get a kick when she could still recite the cost codes of power tools and various hardware items. The attention for detail was paying off out in the real world!!

During high school, the Girls ramped up their sporting activities and started to focus on Athletics, Cross Country Running and also a bit of Tennis. Interestingly enough, Jo and I would have crossed paths at the CHS State Cross Country Championships held at Hurlstone Ag College in 1977.

They also found time to also progress from Brownies to Girl Guides. Musters and camps were attended and they both rose quickly though the ranks to Patrol Leaders, finally achieving the highest rank of Queen's Guide with presentation of the award by the Governor of NSW, Sir Rodden Cuttler.

School and High School Certificates were sat and good grades recorded in all subjects. Geography was Jenny's favourite - definitely an early sign of a future "Travel Bug". She loved a map and an atlas, and this remained another constant throughout her life.

Successful Grades accomplished in the HSC saw the Girls accepted into the Bachelor of Business at UTS.

Following interviews the Girls accepted Business/Administration cadetships with the Electricity Commission of NSW. Our lives crossed similar paths again, as I had the same Interviewer for my successful application for an Engineering Cadetship. We were now working for the same company - be it 12,000 people.

Group assignments were the norm at UTS and they always found it easier if the group consisted of two members - more specifically themselves. Minimizing traveling, they were on the same wavelength, which provided for a consistent approach to completing the assignment just in time.

At work, as was the case during their school days at Sylvania, Jenny and Jo made many friends. There were lots of "Work Outings" with friends from [Work and] Uni.

Being at an age to travel independently, they made many "trips away". These were always well documented with many photographs taken, always with people in them (themselves typical) and some local landmark behind.

Jenny documents in a 1995 twin survey that they had traveled overseas on 13 occasions, as well as numerous holidays in Australia.

At work Jenny was provided with early work experiences, mainly in Purchasing (there were lots of cost codes to remember there). Jenny then pursued a career in Internal Audit, specializing in large mainframe computer systems and business systems. This was the days before PC's. Joanne followed a more traditional path into financial and management accounting. As PC progresses throughout the organization, there were now many PC Id numbers to remember.

All kinds of sporting activities were tried and some pursued more than others. The main sport would then become Touch Football, participating in three separate competitions each week. Also they found the water and learnt to row single and double sculls, as well as 4's and 8's.

Through a combined interest in running, Jenny and I crossed paths in organising our company's participation in the inaugural Corporate Games held in Nov 1989. I can remember the first time we met and I how I was instantly attracted to her smile, blue eyes and lovely [nature]. On the [day of the Games] I realized that Jenny was an identical twin. We all had a great day.

Afterwards, I often thought of Jenny and a few months later out of the blue, she arranged to give me a team photo from the day and then asked me to partner her to a wedding. I was stunned. We agreed to go out on 30th March 1990 before the wedding in order to get to know each other better. We had dinner and saw a movie. She then showed me photo albums of her travels late into the night - it just seemed so easy to listen and talk to her and even then I hoped that she we would be the one for me. I could not believe she was interested in me. After a month we were going out and a 10 year courtship ensued.

During this time many milestones and life changing experiences occurred. The Girls completed their Masters [in Finance at UTS], Norm (their father) passed away suddenly in hospital, on [Tue 0]2 Jun 1992.

In late Mar 1997 Jenny was diagnosed with breast cancer and a mastectomy followed a few weeks later. She returned to work and got on with her life. On New Years Eve 1997, Margaret (their mother) was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. Margaret was referred to Jodi as her Oncologist and numerous chemo courses followed. The Girls would attend all consultations with her. Around the same time Jenny's cancer recurred in the scar tissue of the mastectomy. This is when Jodi also became Jenny's Oncologist. Now Margaret and Jenny were having chemo at the same time.

Through a cancer course at Royal Nth Shore, Jenny found Barbara (now Sister Suscila) and that's where they found meditation and a natural/spiritual approach to healing. Around this time Jenny also joined the Sutherland Shire Cancer Support Group which was facilitated by Liz, a social worker with Calvary.

Stong relationships were established and developed with Jodi, Suscila and Liz and though each of their own skill sets and support networks helped influence Jenny's approach and ensuing journey with cancer. I believe they helped Jenny to embrace her cancer and to live life to the full.

Unfortunately Margaret's cancer was quite advanced and spread quickly. Jodi saw in Jenny and Joanne a strength of character and asked them to care palliatively for Margaret at home, while she would make house calls. This has been Jenny and Jo's greatest gift in life, caring for their mother at home for 8 weeks (Jenny was still having her chemo at this time) until Margaret succumbed to her cancer on 28 April 1999 (her wedding anniversary).

Jenny's breast cancer spread to her lungs and in late 1999 scans revealed 10 tumors. A hormone therapy treatment started. Jenny and Jo traveled to visit Suscila in Alice Springs and visited Uluru for the Millennium. Jenny would recall later that she had an amazing experience lying in the red desert sand at the foot of Uluru.

Shortly after her return from Uluru we became engaged and we set about organizing our wedding in just 10 weeks. The big day being the 30th April 2000. What a day. We sang “Song of Joy”. We exchanged vows and rings and then kissed as Husband and Wife. At the reception we made toasts, spoke and danced the night away. A rainbow theme being the unifying element with rainbow inspired flowers, ribbons, cake, speeches and songs. We honeymooned on Lord Howe and shortly after our return Jenny retired from work to pursue her passions (on Jodi's suggestion).

At the Sydney Olympics later that year we must have held the record for the most sessions attended - handball becoming our favourite. We had many fond and inspiring memories from the whole event.

At that time, just over 9 years ago, we had no idea how long we would have together. This did not stop us and we tried to live a normal life with goals set for six months at a time. Holidays were planned and taken - a trip to the Cook Islands to visit Susila over Xmas 2000, a 4 week trip to North West Australia in May 2001 and a return to Lord Howe in Oct 2001 so Joanne and my Mother could share the experience.

Another constant was our annual trip to Mt Kosciusko for a benchmarking 22km walk around the Main Range. This year was her hardest effort – but she did it. Maybe it was a sign of things to come.

In late 2000 I bought a small digital camera to document our travels and lives. I did not know how much time we would have share and the camera gave me some comfort that I could capture our memories.

Jenny's cancer was ever persistent and there was always something going on - radiation, more chemo, hormone injections or tablets and numerous operations - we could watch “House” and could easily relate to the medical terms.

Through one of her chemo treatments, Jenny found a Dragons Abreast flyer at the hospital. This would be start of the biggest change in our lives. Jenny and Joanne took to paddling like "ducks to water" and I found myself photographing them and the dragon boats that they trained and raced. It gave them opportunities to travel wide and far. Our holidays were now planned around Dragon Boat regattas locally and internationally.

Jo would make the NSW and Australian Team to Poland in 2003. Jenny was held back by a course of chemo and numerous trips to the hospital. She still remained involved by videoing the teams at time trials at Penrith.

In 2004 she would make the NSW Team and compete for her country in the World Championships in Shanghai. There could not have been a prouder person when Joanne's Premier Mixed Team won a bronze medal in the 500m race.

During the 2004 Shanghai campaign Jenny’s journey was captured by an Australian Story episode titled "In the Pink". She was nervous participant and a little uncertain about how it would be scripted and received. We all nervously awaited its airing on that June long weekend Monday - unaware as to its content. The episode captured the essence of the Dragons Abreast Movement in Australia, showing all sides to cancer and it's impact - positive and negative.

The episode would popularize Dragons Abreast Australia beyond it's creators wildest dreams. Clubs quickly popped up everywhere across the country and continue to do so. Meanwhile, Jenny and Joanne would become the most well known (yet most humble) paddlers in Australia.

Others today have told of Jenny's inspiring feats on the water and there is no need for me to repeat them. She just loved to paddle and found great comfort amongst her paddling colleagues. It provided a sense of normality to her life and she just seem to fit in, even with compression sleeve on her right arm or the missing hair on her head which was always discreetly hidden by a colourful selection of bandana's.

Jenny empowered many people (with and without) cancer to pursue their dreams. She will live on through Joanne and I and no doubt many others from her inspiring journey. Thinking of Jenny will help influence our decisions and motivate us to achieve our dreams and to decide what is right.

I will miss hearing you breath as you slept. I will miss calling out “I love you” as I leave for work each day. Whistling at the front door when I got home and hearing you whistle back. You were the most amazing thing to happen in my life I am having trouble comprehending the way forward. You provided me with love and gave me hope and life purpose. I would always say to Jenny “I am the lucky one”.

A couple of quotes from her regular talks and Australian Story follow and I think there is something there to inspire us all. No matter the circumstance.

“Cancer is something that people do not expect to happen to them and no matter who is diagnosed, and at whatever time in their life, it is a shock which has huge ramifications for not only the person involved but also their family and friends. It takes a lot of adjustment to get used to.”

“I feel I am so lucky and have a wonderful life. I have had some great opportunities through breast cancer to meet some very inspiring people. Geoff and Jo have been a constant source of support for me. Breast cancer has totally changed my life but for the best.”

“I don't understand how things work out, and why things work out the way they do. I feel like I've been lucky. I don't understand how cancer works, I don't know why I've been blessed the way I have been.”

“It's just in the lap of the gods.”

Enjoy your new “Island Home” and those that surround you [there]. You know that “We’ll be There” and we know that “You’ll be There”.

As we said to each other before we nodded off each night .. Jenny:

“Good Night, God Bless, I Love You.”

"That is my life story up until now."