To improve, find ways to make mistakes - Jeff Haden (Mon 21 Mar 2011)

From How to Master Any Skill (No Talent Required) by Jeff Haden (Mon 21 Mar 2011) ..

We learn best from making mistakes. To improve, find ways to make mistakes:

• Slow down. Forcing yourself to go slower breaks habits as well, and is a perfect way to uncover adaptations that weren’t apparent at normal speed.



• Speed up. Go much faster than normal. Sure, you’ll screw up, but in the process you’ll break up old habits, adapt to new conditions, and find improvements.



• Break a complex task into component parts. Almost every task includes discreet steps. Pick one, deconstruct it, master it… then put the whole task back together. Then choose another component part.



• Measure differently. Pick a different measurement than you normally use to analyze performance. Measure speed instead of accuracy, for example, or use video or audio. (A friend taped four initial meetings with prospective customers and identified several bad habits he was unaware of. Watching yourself isn’t particularly fun, but it’s darned objective.)

Stumbled across this today (via one of my google alerts - Daniel Coyle). Makes sense to me, though it is hard to watch yourself in video's.

Peri's Boat - Technique Review - Left (Sun 12 Dec 2010)

Tagliatelle Bolognese 101 and The Known Unknown - Alexandria (Fri 17Jul 2015)

Plated Up - Fuel and Courage for 35km paddle tomorrow - Alexandria (Fri 17 Jul 2015)

Now we know what Pluto looks like after knowingly not knowing for quite a while now (a great read about the significance of this here at ribbonfarm ). So on a slight less significant level, here is what I know now, that I did not knowingly know back 13 months ago...

Just on 13 months ago I found a passion for cooking. A new kitchen and a little help from Michelle and I was on my way. One of the dishes Michelle suggested was a spaghetti bolognese.

I thought that would be an easy start, so went to Google to find a recipe, as you do. This is the one I liked the most from all the ones I read back then:

• Spaghetti bolognese recipe: Italian chefs show world the correct way

I liked the authenticity of ingredients, the correctness and approval from Bologna - a place we were heading to on the way to the World Club Crews in Ravenna a few months later.

I have cooked this recipe almost every second week for a year now. And all modesty aside (you know me), the one I cooked this last Monday was perfecto, with a hand and fingers rising from my mouth.

Indeed the recipe looked simple and my first efforts did not excit me that much and I thought to myself where was I going wrong? I have learnt that a recipe is just a starting point and that to make it work and indeed, great, like anything in life, you have to experiment, listen and learn from others, take risks, knowingly or unknowingly.

These are just some of the things I have learnt:

• I tried different ingredients from different places and found the best ones.


• Brown onions are much better than white onions, they help give you a nice brown sauce.


• Finely cut the carrots and celery rather than coarsely cut - a lot of experimenting to work that one out. Your preference might be different, but finely cut works best for me.


• The cheaper the cans of tinned diced tomatoes are, the better they are.


• A couple of diced real tomatoes add so much to a couple of cheap tins of diced tomatoes.


• You need a good can openner.


• Best mince is not the best for a bolognese and that a 50-50 combination of best mince and normal mince is best - a little fat goes a long way in taste and texture. I found this one out by mistake, as my usual and preferred butcher had virtually run out of best mince that day, so I topped it up with the normal mince.


• Browning and slightly burning the Pancetta on the pan base, also adds a browness and richness to the sauce. Just keep stirring it into the olive oil as you are browning it.


• Only add the red wine (and again cheaper the better) after the mince has been browned. Then make sure to take the time to boil it down without a lid until 30% has boiled away.


• As suggested in the article, a big thick pasta like tagliatelle is best. Beats spaghetti and even fettuccine by a long way.


• A little olive oil in the pasta makes it less sticky and easy to handle when serving up (Thanks to Darren and his Mum for that one).

It has taken 13 months to work all this out and I am so pleased with what I have learnt. Feel like I could enter World Bolognese Champs mentioned in the article and give it pretty good shake.

So as New Horizons speeds past Pluto into the outer Solar System and beyond, to make more of the unknown known, I will continue my quest to know more, master and perfect what I don't already know about Tagliatelle Bolognese 101.

Ready to Go - Alexandria (Mon 13 Jul 2015)

Simmeringly Good - Alexandria (Mon 13 Jul 2015)

All done... - Alexandria (Fri 17 Jul 2015)

Thank You: RPM ..

I started RPM (an interval based stationary bike programme with 7 cherographed training tracks) at Sydney University's Aquatic Centre's RPM Studio on Fri 11 May 2007. I was so "pumped" and I can still remember calling Jenny almost straight after the session to say that it was everything (plus more) that I hoped it would be. Jenny and Jo had told me about their "Spinning Classes" and how much they enjoyed it. I had finally found the same thing - thanks Jenny and Joanne.

RPM Studio - Sydney Unit Aquatic Centre (Mon 30 Nov 2009)
I had been toying with the idea of doing some Group Fitness at the Sydney Uni Gym. My membership at the time allowed me to use the Gym equipment only. The previous weekend I had successfully trialled for the Australian Senior Open's Dragon Boat team to participate at the 2007 IDBF World Dragon Boat Championships. I was looking for something new and thought I needed to try something different, to compliment the running I was doing for my cardio.

I was a little nervous about the joining the Group Fitness Programmes and in my normal way, I put it off until I read a blog post by Drew Ginn titled:

• Ridden into the ground and loving it

I had been following Drew's Blog for a few months. I had really connected to his writing style (particularly the grammatical and spelling errors :-) and found all his articles to be very motivating. Being a Rower, his articles could easily be translated and related to my world of dragon boating [in actual fact, I have felt that I have almost lived a parrallel life, though not quite at the same level :-) ]

Vincent and Geoff - RPM Sydney Uni Aquatic Centre (Fri 27 Nov 2009)

Heart Rate - First RPM Class - Fri 11 May 2007 (Vincent)

The Ridden into the ground and loving it post was a motivating story, but it was the following quotes that really caught my eye:

[..] The remarkable thing is each time I go into this place, into this zone I find something special, something new. [..]

[..] The pleasure is in the relationship the lies within the range and scope of extremes. The vastness of feelings marks a cycle. Not just the one we ride but the one that is ever present inside us. [..]

These were the feelings I wanted to explore more. Maybe RPM could accelerate what I had already learnt in the boat.

RPM has turned out to be one of the best decisions I have ever made regarding my development. It has been everything I hoped it would be, plus more.

What have I found in RPM? I have found many things: discipline, the cherography for each track requires a mental discipline. A sense of timing and feeling: the music and tracks require a feeling for the beat and rythym - much like the feeling you need to find when paddling. The interval based workout requires a measured approach to your effort. On top of all of this you become very fit.

Ali and Geoff - RPM Sydney Uni Aquatic Centre (Mon 30 Nov 2009)

When I first started I would hide in the middle of the class and try not to be noticed as I do with most things. As my confidence and understanding grew, I bought a pair of bike shoes with clips (the 2007 Tour de France really motivated me there). With the new shoes, I had to move upto the front row where the bikes with toe clips were. It was a great move. It helped me with my dragon boating (even more), where I had just started to stroke (i.e. sit in the front seat). I started to develop a sense of feeling the energy, and timing behind and around me - it is very similiar to stroking a boat.

Loulou and Geoff - RPM Sydney Uni Aquatic Centre (Tue 01 Dec 2009)

One of the bests parts of RPM for me has been the people. Vincent is the head instructor at the Gym and has worked (and still teaches instructors across Australia) for Les Mills (an Auckland based company) who run and develop the RPM Programme worldwide. James has been an instructor for years and is probably one of the best instructors in Australia - he brings his mountain bike experiences to the class. I have seen both Ali (she started the same time as me) and Loulou go from participants to intructors who run amazing classes and bring their own personalites to each session. Vincent has taught them well, it has been a delight for me to watch their progress and development. As I said, this has been one of the best parts of RPM for me and they have inspired me in my own endeavours.

James and Geoff - RPM Sydney Uni Aquatic Centre (Wed 02 Dec 2009)

These people have contributed significantly to make me the person and athlete I am and I can't thank them enough. Just recently I personally thanked each person and gave them a copy of Jenny's Gold Medal story with a big thank you for their part in my development. Also took the chance to get a photo.

Thank you Vincent, Ali, Loulou and James and all the RPM team at Sydney University Aquatic Centre.

Geoff

Learning to be a little more Certain of the Uncertain - Well Maybe?

Detail - Loch Ness Locks / Fort Augustus / Scotland (Sat 04 Sep 2005)
I did not find the Loch Ness Monster,
but I did find this amazing piece of rusted iron.
I have a been a little stuck on this post. Whenever this happens I look to the Manual of the Warrior of Light (*) by Paulo Coelho (*) and found this ..

A warrior knows that the ends do not justify the means.

Because there are no ends, there are only means. Life carries him from unknown to unknown. Each moment is filled with this thrilling mystery: the warrior does not know where he came from or where is going.

But he is not here by chance. And he is overjoyed by surprises and excited by landscapes that he has never seen before. He often feels afraid, but that is normal in a warrior.

If he thinks only of the goal, he will not be able to pay attention to the signs along the way. If he concentrates only on one question, he will miss various answers that are there beside him. That is why the warrior submits.

This is my 1000th post. A milestone of sorts and something I would not have thought possible when I made my first post (*) here on Thu 26 Feb 2009.

I think the above passage from the Manual of the Warrior of Light (*) provides a useful metaphor for this blog and the 1000 posts that it now comprises.

It is a reflection of my life and who I am. I am never quite sure where it is going - I just try to make connections between what I read, what I see, what I photograph and what I feel.

A lot has happened and changed in the last three and half years since that first post. I have learnt a lot about myself and others. I have made plenty of mistakes, yet I think I have done a few things right. I have been defeated, yet I have have had a few wins, for which I am grateful. I have been sad and I have been happy. I have felt lost and without purpose yet in some ways I have found myself. I have looked to the past, present and future. I have had regrets [and learnt how to let them go]. I have given up and I have battled on. I have lost belief in myself, yet I have found ways to restore that belief. I have been hurt, upset and I have forgiven. I have cried and I have laughed. I have been directionless and without purpose, yet I have had goals. I have been inspired. I have tried hard, too hard sometimes. I tried to be something I am not, and I have learnt my limits and what I can be. I have watched and followed, and at times I have lead, mostly unknowingly I should think.

Somehow I am happy when some say I should be angry. I have suffered and have empathised with the suffering of others. I have been drawn into other people's battles and have known how to respond. I believe in luck (and fate) and know that it comes from being prepared and the willingness to take a risk.

I have changed but remained the same. I am older though I feel younger. I am experienced but still feel like a beginner. I am wiser but more naive. I found a voice (an awkward one at that) I did not know I had. You don't know how far you have been until you get back. I've been all over and it's been all over me . Therefore I am thankful for this blog and what I have learnt about myself and others.

Many times I have asked myself why? post what I have posted here and other times I have said to myself, well why not? (this post being an example). I am starting to forget things, so it is nice to make the effort to write what is important, so it can be recalled. I have memories and I am making memories.

Most importantly, I have Remembered Jenny (*) - how she lived and how she died. Jo and I are the bearers of her memory and she lives on in our hearts and in our minds until we lay to rest beside her.

I could go on, but I won't ().

It's all here in these 1000 posts which are just like snapshots of my life.

Like Paulo Coelho's good warrior, I am not really sure where I am going and what might be ahead. I have come to learn that this is what life is all about. Ultimately I think I have learnt to become a bit more certain of the uncertain. I have accepted this - well at least I think I have.

Hopefully, i will have the opportunity to post another 1000 posts. Let's see what happens.

[the warrior] is overjoyed by surprises and excited by landscapes that he has never seen before - Loch Ness / Scotland (Sat 03 Sep 2005)

On Imagination - Trent Parke / The Black Rose (Mon 23 Mar 2015)

Imagination - Barcelona (Tue 06 Aug 2013)
Trent Parke (*) writes on Imagination (*):

Symbolically the Balck Rose represents death, or the overcoming of a long journey. It is the search for absolute perfection as the Black Rose does not truly exist. It is also referred to as Black Magic.

Imagination is the key to the whole Black Rose. It is the most important thing. Imagination is always so important to me. And Dreams allow you to get to those places you can't get to in your normal day to day working. They up open things up you could never possibly think of.

via TRENT PARKE: THE BLACK ROSE (*).

Time of Your Life by Green Day

Time of Your Life - Green Day
A great acoustic version of this song and something different to their normal approach/style. Great to see them so relaxed (love the Malaysia T-Shirt that Billie Joe Armstrong is wearing). The song has an interesting background.

On a Heavy Heart - I Wrote this for You / Iain S. Thomas (Mon 25 May 2015)

Self Portrait - Alexandria (Mon 01 Jun 2015)

I Wrote this for You on Heart:

If you carry someone in your heart for too long, it will become heavy..

via The Sky Has Weight by I Wrote this for You (Iain S. Thomas.

Nothing the matter with a heavy heart. At least you know you have a heart and that's all you need to live, to be grateful for what you had and to be happy just for that. I realised this a long time ago and it is how I choose to live my life. Today, the first cold day of winter, it shone through a little brighter than normal.

Downwind Session - Whosus - Port Kembla to Shellharbour (Sat 29 Nov 2014)

Downwind Session - Whosus - Port Kembla to Shellharbour (Sat 29 Nov 2014)
An amazing session. A bit of a sample of what it was like here (a long past post from Oct 2009. That video I have on my PC since 2008 before we even had Whosus). Thanks Michelle for the great photos, and Annett and Michelle for making it happen.

Resuming normal transmission, hopefully, following a technical glitch and a bit of a break.

Song Writing - Struggle and Empathy - Tim Levinson - Spectrum (Sat 09 Mar 2013)

Primitive Markings #1- Swanston / Erskineville (Jan 2013)
Tim Levinson (*) talks to Bernard Zuel (*) on Empathy (*) and Struggle (*) in creating in song writing:

''Part of who I am is, I think, I can empathise (*),'' he says. ''I used to think it was the most normal thing in the world but I realise it's one of the qualities I've been left with, for better or for worse.

''In songwriting, quite often you either come from a point of view of struggle … whether that be heartbreak or circumstances. That allows you to write with conviction.

''For me, I have often seen little windows of that struggle (*) or that heartbreak and it gives me an access point I don't necessarily fully understand. I look at those little cracks of light that come through as an invitation to look into it more.''

via 'The best music is written with conviction' (*) by Bernard Zuel (*).

Primitive Markings #2 (Erasure) - Swanston / Erskineville (Feb 2013)

A Moment - Doug Miller (Fri 28 Aug 2009)

Gulf of St Vincent - Blue Sky, Blue Ocean - South Australia (Fri 01 May 2015)

Doug Miller on a Moment and Eternity:

One of the most difficult parts of walking the early stages of cancer seems to be the waves of feelings, emotions, guilt, etc. that you feel. It is the strangest feeling. One moment you are having a normal conversation or doing simple daily tasks and SUDDENLY......WHAM you get hit by a wave of thoughts. [..]

But at times this weight lifts. And for a moment there is a lightness of being. At times as you face your mortality there are moments where the importance rests solely in a single moment. The blueness of the sky, a breeze, the warmth of the sun, a laugh with a friend, the touch of a hand, these moments sometimes sharpen the focus of life. And at once time stands still pausing in the simplicity and perfection of that moment. Maybe that is how eternity feels.

via Waves by Doug Miller.

Rabbit Hole - Sydney Morning Herald - Spectrum (Sat 19 Feb 2011)

Rabbit Hole - Sydney Morning Herald (w) - Spectrum (Sat 19 Feb 2011)
Gained a couple of insights from watching this movie and then having a look around the web where I found a couple of good reviews written by Grief Counsellors:

• Unbearable Grief in Rabbit Hole (2010) by Joseph Burgo, and


• A Grief Therapist’s Film Perspective: The Rabbit Hole by Beth S. Patterson

Particularly liked what Beth S. Patterson writes in A Grief Therapist’s Film Perspective: The Rabbit Hole:

Change is part of the grief process too.

Grief changes us.

We are never the same after a major loss.

In fact, part of the process of grief is to find one’s “new normal.”

Conversely, as we change, our grief changes.

As Leah’s mother eloquently describes it, grief is like a brick in one’s pocket – we always feel it, but over time it feels less heavy. After some time, we can actually forget that it’s there sometimes, but memories come back, and we feel the brick again.

Had kind of worked this out for myself (i.e. in order to move forward, you need to adapt, otherwise you can get stuck) and was actually going to write about it to mark the 2nd anniversary of this little Blog, which passed quietly while I was in Auckland for the Takapuna Cup. In the end I did not get around to posting (happens a lot - only a fraction of what I would like to post makes it here - have started so many posts that never quite get finished).

Anyway, what I had thought I would write about for that unwritten 2nd Anniversay Post was how my life (and is some ways my identity) had changed since that first post on the Wed 25 Feb 2009 and how I thought the blog might give some indication to what I am passionate about, who I was , the transition to who I have become and where I am heading, at least in the short-term.

I have enjoyed the Blogging. It has given me a creative outlet and has kept my mind stimulated. It is fun to look over what I have written. Like a photograph, I can remember the feelings and the reasons why I might have written the post.

Finally, as Ken Burns said at the 2004 Commencement Yale Class Day Speech (as pdf):

Write: write letters. Keep journals. Besides your children, there is no surer way of achieving immortality. Remember, too, there is nothing more incredible than being a witness to history.

Keep on Blogging.

Regards .. Geoff

It's whoever has worked the hardest and smartest who will win - Anders Gustafsson (Sun 22 Aug 2010)

Anders Gustafsson (twitter) World Champion Kayaking K1 500m 2010 (youtube - Tweet)

Anders Gustafsson - K1 500m - 2010 ICF World Championships - Poznan/Poland - (Sun 22 Aug 2010)

A transcription of the video follows:

Anders Gustafsson (twitter): Hi, this is Anders Gustafsson. Tomorrow I will leave for the [2010] World Championships in Poland.

It's been really [difficult] training here in Sweden leading into the World Championships.

This is a pretty normal day (very windy and cold). Can't say it has been the best.

All my time trials have been really slow. That wont affect me too much. I will still go to Poland with a strong heart.

A flashback to the 2009 World Championships:

Commentator: 7/100 of a sec. That was the difference between Gustafsson and the German Rahue at the finish. And the Swedish settle for another silver this world championships.

Anders Gustafsson (twitter): Yesterday I was so happy over my Silver. But today I can't help to think about how close it was. Sadly I didn't win.

I'm stoked but still what little extra fuel to work even harder. I will try to make sure next time that I will be the best. I want to be world champion.

It's a huge difference in being 2nd in the world and being world champion.

I dream about the day when I can say that I am world champion.

I still think about the close race in 2009 sometimes.

I get over it by working even harder and to try and make sure that next time I have the inches on my side.

And in kayaking it's not luck that decides who wins.

It's whoever has worked the hardest and smartest who will win.

At the end, we go back to Anders in Sweden before leaving for Poland.

Anders Gustafsson (twitter): This has only made me harder and tougher and hopefully that will show in the race in Poland.

Using the Past - Some Advice from Ken Burns, Vern Gambetta and LottieP

The following three quotes are about the past and future, and how we might relate them to each other (if that makes any sense). There is some good advice in all three quotes and I thought that I put them here for future reference, so that they will become part of my past :-). Here they are:

As you pursue your goals in life, that is to say your future, pursue your past. Let it be your guide. Insist on having a past and then you will have a future.
Ken Burns - 2004 Commencement Yale Class Day Speech (as pdf)

Vern Gambetta wisely adds:

Be careful that you are not living in the past, learn from the past, use it as a reference point.

And finally, LottieP warns:

"nostalgia is the enemy of the future"

With the past in mind I thought I would dig into archive.org and drag out something from my past (it might explain the where eljeiffel came from). Here it is:

elj.com (Eiffel Liberty): Two Years On .. by Geoff Eldridge (04 Jul 1999)

Today is Indepedence Day in the USA which celebrates the 223rd birthday, being founded on 4 Jul 1776, with the signing of the Declaration of Independence. This also represents a time of reflection for myself with elj.com (Eiffel Liberty).

It is two years ago since I registered elj.com. The name Eiffel Liberty was easy to come up with. It represented a vision and a hope for Eiffel that somehow it might be liberated from its miserable place in the language landscape (I thought how could such a great contribution, be so categorically and overwhelmingly dismissed by the programming community). Also, Emma Lazarus's words struck a chord with me, particularly

Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost, to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!

Just as America provided opportunity for many from other lands, I thought Eiffel could provide the same kind of opportunities for the syntactically and semantically battered from the other language landscapes :-)

Also, the name Eiffel Liberty made what a I thought was a nice connection between two famous landmarks that Gustave Eiffel had contributed to, being the Eiffel Tower and the Statue of Liberty "Eiffel undertook the challenge of creating the steel structure because of the enormous challenge it afforded him".

The 4 Jul 1997 was to be the launch date for the Eiffel Liberty Journal. However, I came down with a very bad cold (too many late nights preparing for the initial launch) and I decided to publish the launch issue of the Eiffel Liberty Journal, not from my newly acquired elj.com but from my progsoc web pages (this would remain the case for another six months).

It was fun putting together the first issue as I received cooperation from all I contacted. These included:

• Bertrand Meyer who allowed to me publish some small extracts from OOSC2.



• John Potter (my Software Engineering Lecturer who introduced me to Eiffel in the spring of 1993) who specially wrote an article on
  Project Bruce: Translating from Eiffel to Java



• Victor Putz who wrote a great article titled Toymakers and tools: Why one game developer is switching to Eiffel. Victor is a game programmer by night and a helicopter pilot/instructor by day. I remember Victor making a special trip (about 30 km each way) to send me the article because of flooding in his area which made his normal internet access impossible. BTW, I have found that Victor shares and
  articulates (much better than I ever could) my own vision for Eiffel.

Also Bertrand Meyer's classic newsgroup posting from early May 97, Avoiding the second historic mistake (I remember Bertrand once referring to this as collective hypnosis :-) gave the opportunity to publish a few articles from the newsgroup thread that ensued - eg Jeffrey Stulin's If Eiffel is so great, why isn't it popular? and Thomas Beale's Eiffel: An Industry Experience.

I was delighted when Bjarne Stroustrup allowed me to publish Why C++ is not just an Object-Oriented Programming Language and Melier Page Jones allowed me to publish Object Orientation: Making the Transition

Two years on, elj.com has changed from a random journal to a daily random news update covering the Eiffel and related worlds. In many ways elj.com is really just a log of the links and resources I have stumbled across and that I might learn from (or even get a laugh from).

Eiffel certainly enjoys a wider exposure than it did back in 1997. I hope elj.com has helped in a small way. It is hard tell what impact elj.com has had as there is little feedback. However, occasionally I do get a note saying that elj.com helped someone get started with Eiffel, which seems to make it all worthwhile. I guess elj.com could have been much more effective but there is only so much time.

For a number of reasons I renamed Eiffel Liberty to elj.com Extraordinarily Large Jumble in Feb 99 (some of the reasoning behind this was that elj.com was and still is, an Extraordinarily Large Jumble of seemingly random links and more significantly there was little or no Eiffel news). Fortunately, there now appears to be more Eiffel news than I can handle/report manually and I am making efforts to address this through a more automated Eiffel news feed at elj-daily.

elj.com has amassed an incredible amount of links, quotes and resources relating to Eiffel and related worlds. The time has come for elj.com to be able to extract the information from this mass. A keyword/search facility is on the way.

I believe that for [open source] projects to thrive, information needs to readily at hand. I hope the new elj.com that you will see over the coming weeks/months (depends on how much time I get to work on this) will reflect the ability to provide this information efficiently and effectively.

Finally, I would like to acknowledge the support that Jenny has given me over the last few years. She has had to cope (in more ways than one) with more than anyone should reasonably have to tolerate.

Funny to read this after all these years. Shows how strongly I felt about the Eiffel programming language and method (and still do, but not just as visible). I even chose to start this blog with some posts on Eiffel - not the language, but it's inspiration, the Eiffel Tower and it's creator, Gustave Eiffel.

I had better stop here as I think I might be getting a bit nostalgic. Anyway, hoping all of this might help me find the inspiration to get a future project off the ground.

Wind in the Willows - Qingpu / China (20 Oct 2004)

Trees are exceptional people - Wind in the Willows - Qingpu / China - 20 Oct 2004 (picasa)
"Trees are exceptional, people [..]
Belonging fully to earth but living also in sky
They have no death but only transformations."

From Future Now by Tessa Ransford

Jenny always loved this photo which I took while Jenny and Joanne participated in the 2004 World Dragon Boat Championships at Qingpu, a lakeside race course, about 50 km to the west of Shanghai. I had it professionally printed in A4 and A3 sizes with a selection of my favourite photos. Jenny always wanted me to frame it and put it up somewhere in the living area so we could remember our trip to Qingpu and Shanghai as well as enjoy the intricate and subtle details of the sunset silhouetted wind blown willow.

Whenever Jenny went into Hospital we always put photos up around her room and it was always a great way to generate a bit of conversation with the many Hospital Satff that were in and out of her room.

When Jenny went into ICU for the final week of her life, I pulled the A4 print of this photo out of the pile of prints I had had made and placed it on a column in front of her bed in the vague hope that she might see and recognise it.

On the day before Jenny died Joanne picked up the photo and moved it across Jenny's face and we were excited to see her eyes follow it - the first sign to us of some improvement in her condition. I went off to an outrigging canoe training session that Monday night happier than I had been in a long time and I arranged to see her on the way home, well after the normal visiting hours.

When I arrived into the ICU about 9.30pm, it was a different place to the busy and noisy place it was during the day. It was very quiet and the lights were dimmed apart from a soft spot light above Jenny's bed. She was asleep and looked very relaxed, the most relaxed I had seen her in the two weeks she had been in hospital. I decided not to wake her and sat quietly at her bed side and watched her steady breathing. I spoke quietly and proudly to Jenny's dedicated nurse about Jenny's life. I left Jenny that night not knowing that it would be the last time I would see her alive.

At 9.16am on Tue 30 Jun 2009 (the next morning), Jenny left us without Joanne or I by her bedside. Yet I know, Jenny was not alone, as the above photo, the one she loved so much, looked over her as she broke free from this world.

Just as the above poem extracts indicates, it might be nice to think that Jenny transformed herself into our memories:

They have no death but only transformations

It is through our memories of Jenny that she lives on.

I will frame both A4 and A3 prints once I find a place for them and myself. For the moment I am happy to have written this post (which i had planned to do for a long time) which was inspired by the above poem extract. Thanks Charlotte.

Thanks to LottieP for allowing me to find the above extract from a poem by Tessa Ransford via her post of a beautiful poem titled The White Stone of Lewis.

(My first post from an iPad while on a weeks holiday at Coolangatta.)

Helping Each Other - Paul Ford (Sat 18 Jun 2016)

Opera House / Harbour Bridge - Vivid - Sydney (Sat 11 Jun 2016)

Paul Ford on Helping Each Other:

people do help other people. It’s pretty normal.

via Pattern — Ford’s Sensorium — Medium by Paul Ford.

Speech Therapy - St George Private Hospital (Mon 22 Jun 2009)

Jenny and her Speech Therapist - Rehabilitation - Speech Therapy - St George Private Hospital (Mon 22 Jun 2009)
"The Bag of Tricks" - Rehabilitation - Speech Therapy - St George Private Hospital (Mon 22 Jun 2009)"Down to Business" - Rehabilitation - Speech Therapy - St George Private Hospital (Mon 22 Jun 2009)
"Progress" - Rehabilitation - Speech Therapy - St George Private Hospital (Mon 22 Jun 2009)
"Determination" - Rehabilitation - Speech Therapy - St George Private Hospital (Mon 22 Jun 2009)
The sheer determination of Jenny to get herself back to normal is one of the most amazing things I have seen in my life. She never felt sorry for herself and she did not once say "Why Me?" in the 13 years of her Life with Cancer.

I think these photos of Jenny with her Speech Therapist show what I mean.

When my motivation and confidence is lacking, I need to look at these and remind myself of what true determination is and get on with it without trying to compare myself to others, worrying about what others think or feeling sorry for myself.

These photos and this blog are great reminders to how I should lead my life. I guess you could say they are my "Speech Therapy".

Thank you Jenny.

A Familiar Path - "A Walk to Remember" ..

A Familiar Path by Doug Miller:

[..] A single step repeated hundreds and thousands of times would eventually arrive at the end. It did not take superhuman strength or a talent that most do not have. It took a steadfast commitment. Step by step as the miles added up and the challenges slipped by. Today just like those days on the trail, is another step. Tomorrow yet another. I walk this journey in anticipation of the end, but I also know that there is much to learn in the process. It is the process, no matter what the hardship where great beauty and adventure can be found.

Jenny and Joanne - Main Range Walk - Path to Blue Lake - 06 Jan 2002

Around New Year, each year for the last 10 years we have traveled to the Snowy Mountains area (around Perisher Valley and Jindabyne) to get away from the Christmas/New Year Crowds, to relax and take in the sights of the Snowy Mountains.

Each year we would take the opportunity to challenge ourselves to the 22km Main Range Summit walk, to not only witness the beauty of the mountains, but to test ourselves and to benchmark our fitness to the previous years effort. This was particularly important for Jenny. She and we could see what effect her cancer and treatment was having on her physical body, for the previous 12 months.

Wild Flowers - Snowy Mountains Main Range Walk - 29 Dec 2005

Some years were easy, while others were more challenging, particularly the long and steep uphill leg from the Blue Lake to the Summit of Mt Kosciuszko.

One of the more difficult years for Jenny was January 2008 when a side-effect from one her treatments, which caused soreness and tenderness of her feet (Hand-Foot Syndrome), made it very difficult for her to walk even a few steps. This did not stop her and she did the 22km walk, one painful step at a time. I was so proud of her, though, in typical Jenny style she thought it to be nothing unusual.

Snowy Mountains Main Range Walk - 29 Dec 2005

On the first day of this year, we did the Main Range walk, for what would turn out to be our last time together. While temperatures in Sydney were the typical balmy 30's, the weather in the Mountains had turned and there was a wind chill factor of -15 deg C. This was our last day to do the walk, we were prepared with Jenny and Joanne wearing seven layers, with beanies and gloves. We decided to at least walk the first 6 km to the Blue Lake and make a decision there whether to continue on for the next 16km or return.

For all of us, the conditions were challenging. However, for Jenny the extra challenges which revolved around dealing with the many issues relating to her cancer, the most obvious for this higher altitude challenge, being the tumors in her lungs. Little did we know at that stage the cramping in her stomach she had experienced a few times over the previous month or so, would be the early signs of countless tumors in her liver, which would be diagnosed in early March 2009. On top that, was also the embryonic stages of a tumor in her brain, which would manifest itself as a 4cm tumor in early June 2009.

Jenny and Joanne - Lake Albina - 29 Dec 2005

Needless to say, this was the most difficult Main Range Summit challenge for all of us, and for Jenny in particularly. She was short of breath, even on the small downhill sections. As we reached the Blue Lake, we waited quite a while and we left it up to Jenny to decide what we should do. Eventually, she said she felt she could do it, so off we nervously set, in very strong head winds, to the Summit. We stopped at Lake Albina on the way.

Jenny & Joanne - Lake Albina - Mt Kosciuszko Main Range Summit Walk - 01 Jan 2009

Every step was a struggle for Jenny and she did amazingly well to make it to the Summit. As usual we would take our Summit top photos - this time there was no one there (usually there would be 20-30 people) as we had taken twice as long as normal and we had reached the Summit hours after everyone had headed back to their starting points.

Jenny and Joanne at the Mt Kosciuszko Summit - Mt Kosciuszko Main Range Summit Walk - 01 Jan 2009

When I read the little story (it was a few weeks ago now) from where the above quote comes from, I thought of Jenny initially, and later Joanne and myself. I think it has helped me understand, that we were not only doing this walk each year (with each year being a "step") for the physical beauty and challenge of the Mountains, but also for the beauty that can be found in the "process" of doing something like this each year. I think it also helps me appreciate the difficult "steps" that Joanne and I take each day, without Jenny's physical presence in our lives - but knowing we are "getting on with life" with the support of our family and friends, and knowing many great experiences and adventures lay ahead for us and those in our lives. We know this to be true - we have already witnessed this in Prague in late August 2009 - "Touched by Jenny".

Joanne, David and I will do the Main Range walk this year, probably on the 1 January 2010. We know Jenny will be with us every step of the way.

Jenny and Joanne - Main Range Walk - 06 Jan 2002
Just another little story of perserverance and determination from Jenny.

Jenny near Mt Kosciuszko Summit - 06 Jan 2002

The Climb - Our Main Range Summit Challenge

The Climb - The Main Range Range Summit Challenge

Dragons Abreast Ausrtralia Seminar
Cancer Council Queensland
Tuesday 31st August, 2010

Next is a little story that covers another aspect of Jenny’s Life – our annual trip to the Snowy Mountains and our Main Range Mt Kosciuszko Summit Challenge.

The Colorado Trail is just short of 500 miles in length. Doug Miller spent a summer (approximately 60 days) hiking the trail. In August 2009 he was diagnosed with Cancer.

A few months into his journey with Cancer, he wrote about the lessons he had learnt on the Colorado Trail and how they paralleled the lessons learnt on his journey with Cancer.

I read his story a few months after Jenny had passed away. It resonated with me and I could relate to it, in particular the following quote:

"A single step repeated hundreds and thousands of times would see us eventually arrive at the end.

It did not take superhuman strength or a talent that most do not have. It took a steadfast commitment.

Step by step, the miles added up and the challenges slipped by. Today just like those days on the trail, is another step.

Tomorrow is yet another.

I walk this journey in anticipation of the end, but I also know that there is much to learn in the process.

It is the process, no matter what the hardship where great beauty and adventure can be found."

Doug Miller on the Colorado Trail
Around New Year, for the last 11 years we have travelled to the Snowy Mountains area, around Perisher Valley and Jindabyne, to get away from the holiday crowds, to relax and take in the sights of the Snowy Mountains.

Each year we would also take the opportunity to challenge ourselves to the 22km Main Range Summit walk, to not only witness the beauty of the mountains, but to test ourselves and to benchmark our fitness to the previous year’s effort. This was particularly important for Jenny as she, and we also, could see what effect her cancer and treatment was having on her physical body, for the previous 12 months.

Some years were easy, while others were more challenging, particularly the long and steep uphill leg from the Blue Lake to the Summit of Mt Kosciuszko.

One of the more difficult years for Jenny was January 2008 when a side-effect from one her treatments, which caused soreness and tenderness of her feet (Hand-Foot Syndrome), made it very difficult for her to walk even a few steps. This did not stop her and she did the 22km walk, one painful step at a time. We were so proud of her, though, in typical Jenny style she thought it to be nothing unusual or out of the ordinary.

On the first day of 2009, we did the Main Range walk, for what would turn out to be our last time together. While temperatures in Sydney were the typical balmy 30's, the weather in the Mountains had turned and there was a wind chill factor of minus 15 C. This was our last chance to do the walk. We had tried a day earlier, but were not prepared for the cold. This time we were prepared, with Jenny and Joanne wearing seven layers, as well as beanies and gloves. We decided to at least walk the first 6 km to the Blue Lake and make a decision there whether to continue on for the next 16km or return.

For all of us, the conditions were challenging. However, for Jenny there were extra challenges which revolved around dealing with the many issues relating to her cancer, the most obvious for this higher altitude challenge, being the tumors in her lungs. Little did we know at that stage the cramping in her stomach she had experienced over the previous month or so, would be the early signs of countless tumors in her liver, which would be diagnosed in early March 2009. On top that, was also the embryonic stages of a tumor in her brain, which would manifest itself as a 4cm tumor in early June 2009.

This was definitely the most difficult Main Range challenge for us all, Jenny in particular. She was short of breath, even on the small downhill sections. As we reached the Blue Lake, we rested quite a while and we left it up to Jenny to decide what we should do. Eventually, she said she felt she could do it, so off we nervously set, in very strong head winds, to the Summit. We stopped at Lake Albina on the way.

Every step was a struggle for Jenny and she did amazingly well to make it to the Summit of Mt Kosciuszko. As usual we would take our Summit top photos - this time there was no one there (usually there would be 20-30 people) as we had taken twice as long as normal and we had reached the Summit hours after everyone had headed back to their starting points.

When I read the little story from where the leading quote comes from, I thought of Jenny initially, and later Joanne and myself.

I think it has helped me understand, that we were not only doing this walk each year (with each year being a "step") for the beauty and physical challenge of the Mountains, but also for the beauty that can be found in the "process" of doing something like this each year.

It also helped me appreciate Jenny’s approach to life, her journey with cancer and how she embraced it to live a wonderful and fulfilling life, and to achieve her dreams.

I think it also helps me appreciate the difficult "steps" that Joanne and I take each day, without Jenny's physical presence in our lives - but knowing we are "getting on with life" with the support of our family and friends, and knowing many great experiences and adventures lay ahead for us and those in our lives.

We did the Main Range Summit walk this year, on the 1 Jan 2010 (more here). Jenny was with us every step of the way.

Just another little story of perseverance and determination from Jenny. Jenny guides and inspires us from above.

In closing, we would like to take the opportunity to thank Dragons Abreast. It has provided many opportunities for Jenny, Joanne and I. We are grateful for the experiences in life Dragons Abreast has presented us. We encourage you to embrace these opportunities and experiences also.

The Climb - Power Point Slides (pdf)
The Climb - Power Point Slides (pdf)
The Climb - Power Point Slides (pdf)

Remembering Tim - Norwood Park Crematorium / Canberra (Fri 11 Mar 2005)

Tim (my Brother) and Tom (my Dad) - Norwood Park Crematorium / Canberra (Fri 27 Feb 2015)

Today, 10 years on, we Remember Tim:

Timothy Francis Eldridge was born on Wednesday 4 December 1963 in Tamworth NSW. He became the third and youngest child of Thomas and Betty. He had an elder sister, Lynn, spelt with two n's not one as Tim persisted throughout his whole life). Lynn was two years older than Tim. Myself, Geoff being 3 years older was the eldest. His father was an electrical engineer with the Electricity Commision of NSW. The Regional Centre was based in Tamworth and from this office the electricity transmission system in northern NSW grew. The nature of his Father's work often required nights away from home. We all looked forward to Dad's return on Friday Night with a bag of mixed lollies for all.

Lynn and I found as oursleves at school and this gave Tim two years at home with Mum by himself. Mum tells me now that he spent this time playing with the kids across the road. Even at this early age Tim was making friends. I seem to recall also that Tim managed to get a 1/2 day of pre-school (a first in the family). I always felt that this small period with other new kids gave Tim a nice head start when he commenced his schooling at South Tamworth Primary. He was well adjusted for the rigours of school, made friends easily (he was always going to birthday parties) and was a natural at anything he put his mind to.

He started in the top class in Kindy and there he stayed each year through his primary school days (and subsequent educational endeavours). Tim was a also a natural athlete and started playing rugby league at he age of eight, moving quickly onto soccer and then finally hockey (all in one year .. maybe this was a sign of things to come). He played representative hockey for Tamworth at the state champships every June Long Weekend. I even recall him playing under 12 hockey at Lismore when he was only 9. He was a prodigy even then. He also represented the North Western NSW primary school team in Murwullumbah where his team came back as state champions. Another little publicised sporting achievement was middle distance running and I remember him running a low 2 minute 800 meters at the Tamworth Primary Schools Athletic Carnival. A record that was not broken for many years.

The year Tim finished his primary school saw the Eldridge family move from Tamworth to Wagga for Dad's work. This was a tough time for everyone but we all adapted to new environs and our new high school in Wagga called Kooringal High. It was a new school and much smaller than the high school Lynn and I left in Tamworth. Probably 1/4 the size in students and was so new that it did not even have a sixth form in our first year there. Tim as always fitted in very quickily and he found new friends almost instantly. Many of whom are here today.

By the time Tim reached Wagga he had found the game of golf and before long he was swinging a set of clubs out at the Wagga Country Club, across the lake from where we lived. Here he spent many hours fine tuning his tee shots, fairway shots, chips and putts (or spits as his young nephew would subsequently refer, many years later). Golf was to become a life long passion and this was something which always stayed with him. It was only his 94 year old grandfather who thought something was wrong four weeks ago when he percieved Tim had lost interest in his Golf.

Tim breezed through high school and obtained excellent grades with little effort. In his final year he was nominated as perfect (whooops I meant "a prefect") and was voted school vice captain by his peers. For his HSC he studied a couple of hours each night on the floor in front of the TV. To recover from this strenous study regime, he would spend the next day playing 36 holes of golf.

With his HSC behind him Tim entered the University of Sydney and worked his way towards a Civil Engineering degree over a four year period. The first two years of his course, Tim lived at Wesley College, a residential college on the grounds of Sydney University. Here, Tim, along with some of high school buddies quickily adapted to the demanding University life style. Days at the beach, missing lectures, drinking beer, etc. He found new friends quickily and again many are here today. The nucleaus of this group were quickily dubbed the "DAMAGE BOYS" because of the drinking reputation at College Victory Dinners, formals and other ramdon gatherings.

Mid way through his second year, Tim's father Thomas passed away suddenly at the early age of 47 after a sunday afternoon hockey match. It was my job to tell Tim the news that Sunday night. I now remember his numb response to my news. "Where has he gone?" he asked. His fathers death at such a young age for all of us was a defining moment in Tim's life (probably the most defining moment up until last Saturday). It was a difficult time for Tim and the Family. Initially he seemed to cope well, but the next year saw Tim arrive home to Wagga unannounced many times during the university terms. I guess the one lesson (or theory actually I would call it a LAW) Tim would give us today from all this would be to grieve properly, seek support from Family, Friends and professionals and to address the difficult issues these tramatic events have on the fragile human soul.

Anyway, back to Uni, Tim bravely persisted and graduated with honours at the end of 1985. His brief but eventful civil engineering career started with a small but prestigous Civil Engineering Consultating companycalled Wargon, Chapman and Partners. Mr Wargon, a famous Amercican civil engineer appeared to take Tim under his wing and Tim quickily found himself designing car parks, and tall buildings. As well as doing one-off type jobs such as a structural integrity report of the Channel 9 Transmitter Antenna at the Channel 9 Compound, and preliminary designs for the now Sydney Harbour Tunnel.

Tim quickily realised that Civil Engineering was not for him (however a recent rush of activity with home decks shows there was some latent interest in at least some things civil). On the fifth redesign for an Alan Bond tower on the old Waltons site across from the Sydney Town Hall, Tim decided to move on. This gave him the chance to travel for 3 months overseas which took him to many places in Europe, England, particularly London and even India (if I recall correctly).

London was a place to which Tim would return frequently over the rest of his life, the last being July/August last year. The drawcards to London were friends and another life passion I have not yet mentioned, English Football. His favourite team during his schools days was Queens Park Rangers. Though his interested waned when their goalie Phil Parkes defected to my team West Ham in 1977 for a then world record sum of 565,000 pounds. Subsequent years and more recently Tim has been an Arsenal supporter.

On his return in the late 80's Tim persued his ambition for a new career. In this pursuit he found himself in Canberra studying part-time for a degree in Information Systems at the then Canberra College of Advanced Education and working part-time for small scientific software consulting firms. One system I remember was a flight simiulator program driven by data from aircraft black-box recorders.

On graduation from the CCAE Tim started work at Customs and then Department of Veterans Affairs for a record three years. Towards the end of this stint in DVA, Tim bought his house in Griffith, just up from Marnucka. He lived in the house briefly before deciding that a six month stint in Los Angles working on a Telon Related Inventory system was the go. On his return he decided to work in Sydney and here he had stints at NRMA and Westpac. Weekends saw Tim travelling back to his home in Canberra to catch up with friends and to play golf amongst other things. This became too tiring and before long he was back in Canberra fulltime working at the Australian Tax Office and subsequently Customs. His crowning software achievement was an ATO case-actioning tool which I believed was to be a distillation of systems and processes from the many places he had worked.

More recently, Tim returned to DVA where he ventured into web-based systems using packages such as Websphere and Tomcat.

Wherever Tim worked, he took the roles on seriously. He appeared to very much love a process and a set of rules to capture and implement. He believed rules were meant not to be broken (contrary to the majority of the population) and I always thought that he was perfect fit for the ATO. [He had a great sense of what was right and doing it right].

Another constant in Tim's life were his friends and I will always remember his 40th birthday speech where he said the party was not to celebrate his 40th, but more importantly, a chance for his family and friends to get together.

There is so much more to be said. We all have our memories of Tim and I ask you for just one moment to reflect on the good times you had with him ... and to take this forward with you through the tough times ahead.

It is now time to say goodbye to a loving son, brother, grandson, nephew, uncle, friend and colleague. We now know that Tim struggled with a delibertating and destructive illness which he held undercover for many years. I ask you to take the time to consider the strength he showed under this enormous pressure and to admire him for how he lived a relatively normal and happy life, shared with friends and family.

In the end Tim ran out "Puff" as he said and found peace from his illness the only way he knew how. Please forgive him. He asked for this.

Tim, you asked me where Dad had gone. We know that you searched for him high and low. We also now know that you have found him. The search and struggle is complete and that you have found your peace.

You will always have a special place in our hearts and memories. We will miss you.

Love .. Mum, Lynn and Geoff ..

"That is my life story up until now" - Remembering Jenny (Mon 06 Jul 2009)

The cackle of a Laughing Kookaburra announces the first light of dawn as the sun rose on that cold winters day. With no sleep that night preparing for Jenny's Funeral later in the day, I penned these words to honour Jenny's Life at her Funeral. Six and half years later, looking back at what came out in those last few hours, I am happy. What strikes me most is how I chose to "reflect on the little things". And they are what I miss most. Here it is ..

Jennifer Joy Petterson
24 Mar 1962 - 30 Jun 2009
Age 47 years 3 months and 6 days

"That is my life story up until now."

This is how Jenny ended her "Autobiography" written in 5th class (being 1972). I always enjoyed reading this lengthy account (it had 3 three parts) of Jenny's life up to the age of 10. I loved this story and scanned the original into my computer so that I could read it during a quiet moment at work.

Jenny was the eldest identical twin daughter of Norm and Margaret Petterson of Holt Road, Sylvania. With feet eagerly pressing on Jenny's back at the birth, a younger sister followed 5 minutes after Jenny's arrival. This was her identical twin sister Joanne. She was ready to play and from that time on they were inseparable. On the day of their birth Jenny writes there was a fete at the hospital. Jenny would always tell me that Norm bought a wind up koala at the fete that played music. For some reason she did not write this

The Autobiography, even at the age of 10, shows that Jenny had an eye for detail, as this quote reveals.

"At the age of 4 years and 10 months and 15 days we started school and cried when mummy left us."

It documents many facts and figures - birth weights and lengths, when they first walked, where they holidayed and details such as the colour of the caravans they stayed in - all well recorded for prosperity.

They participated in many sporting activities (which has been a constant throughout Jenny's life) - swimming, physie, jazz ballet, and little athletics, to mention a few.

Furthermore, she recalls the date of their first hair cut. - and even allowing me to determine that her first tooth fell out on my 7th birthday .

More generally what can be summarized from the autobiography is that Jenny had a fun filled, active childhood with her sister Joie and friends, which was encouraged and fostered by their loving parents.

Even as babies there seemed to be an order to things and this became even more apparent once they started to talk (yes that date is also recorded). In Part 1 of Jenny's Autobiography:

"One the 3rd Oct 1964 we had our first haircut and Joie said, 'Denny First', meaning Jenny first".

Jenny even then was a stabilizing influence on Joanne.

As stated above Jenny finishes her "Autobiography" with:

"That is my life story up until now."

Obviously she looks forward to the future and how she will fit into the world as she grows up. In recent years these words struck a chord with me. Today, these words have even greater meaning.

Jenny and Jo progressed to Sylvania High. They started part time work at Grace Bros’, Miranda Fair. Jo in "Cosmetics and Womens Clothing" and Jenny in "Hardware and Gardening" - "Same, Same but Different". I often asked Jenny to recall these days and I would get a kick when she could still recite the cost codes of power tools and various hardware items. The attention for detail was paying off out in the real world!!

During high school, the Girls ramped up their sporting activities and started to focus on Athletics, Cross Country Running and also a bit of Tennis. Interestingly enough, Jo and I would have crossed paths at the CHS State Cross Country Championships held at Hurlstone Ag College in 1977.

They also found time to also progress from Brownies to Girl Guides. Musters and camps were attended and they both rose quickly though the ranks to Patrol Leaders, finally achieving the highest rank of Queen's Guide with presentation of the award by the Governor of NSW, Sir Rodden Cuttler.

School and High School Certificates were sat and good grades recorded in all subjects. Geography was Jenny's favourite - definitely an early sign of a future "Travel Bug". She loved a map and an atlas, and this remained another constant throughout her life.

Successful Grades accomplished in the HSC saw the Girls accepted into the Bachelor of Business at UTS.

Following interviews the Girls accepted Business/Administration cadetships with the Electricity Commission of NSW. Our lives crossed similar paths again, as I had the same Interviewer for my successful application for an Engineering Cadetship. We were now working for the same company - be it 12,000 people.

Group assignments were the norm at UTS and they always found it easier if the group consisted of two members - more specifically themselves. Minimizing traveling, they were on the same wavelength, which provided for a consistent approach to completing the assignment just in time.

At work, as was the case during their school days at Sylvania, Jenny and Jo made many friends. There were lots of "Work Outings" with friends from [Work and] Uni.

Being at an age to travel independently, they made many "trips away". These were always well documented with many photographs taken, always with people in them (themselves typical) and some local landmark behind.

Jenny documents in a 1995 twin survey that they had traveled overseas on 13 occasions, as well as numerous holidays in Australia.

At work Jenny was provided with early work experiences, mainly in Purchasing (there were lots of cost codes to remember there). Jenny then pursued a career in Internal Audit, specializing in large mainframe computer systems and business systems. This was the days before PC's. Joanne followed a more traditional path into financial and management accounting. As PC progresses throughout the organization, there were now many PC Id numbers to remember.

All kinds of sporting activities were tried and some pursued more than others. The main sport would then become Touch Football, participating in three separate competitions each week. Also they found the water and learnt to row single and double sculls, as well as 4's and 8's.

Through a combined interest in running, Jenny and I crossed paths in organising our company's participation in the inaugural Corporate Games held in Nov 1989. I can remember the first time we met and I how I was instantly attracted to her smile, blue eyes and lovely [nature]. On the [day of the Games] I realized that Jenny was an identical twin. We all had a great day.

Afterwards, I often thought of Jenny and a few months later out of the blue, she arranged to give me a team photo from the day and then asked me to partner her to a wedding. I was stunned. We agreed to go out on 30th March 1990 before the wedding in order to get to know each other better. We had dinner and saw a movie. She then showed me photo albums of her travels late into the night - it just seemed so easy to listen and talk to her and even then I hoped that she we would be the one for me. I could not believe she was interested in me. After a month we were going out and a 10 year courtship ensued.

During this time many milestones and life changing experiences occurred. The Girls completed their Masters [in Finance at UTS], Norm (their father) passed away suddenly in hospital, on [Tue 0]2 Jun 1992.

In late Mar 1997 Jenny was diagnosed with breast cancer and a mastectomy followed a few weeks later. She returned to work and got on with her life. On New Years Eve 1997, Margaret (their mother) was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. Margaret was referred to Jodi as her Oncologist and numerous chemo courses followed. The Girls would attend all consultations with her. Around the same time Jenny's cancer recurred in the scar tissue of the mastectomy. This is when Jodi also became Jenny's Oncologist. Now Margaret and Jenny were having chemo at the same time.

Through a cancer course at Royal Nth Shore, Jenny found Barbara (now Sister Suscila) and that's where they found meditation and a natural/spiritual approach to healing. Around this time Jenny also joined the Sutherland Shire Cancer Support Group which was facilitated by Liz, a social worker with Calvary.

Stong relationships were established and developed with Jodi, Suscila and Liz and though each of their own skill sets and support networks helped influence Jenny's approach and ensuing journey with cancer. I believe they helped Jenny to embrace her cancer and to live life to the full.

Unfortunately Margaret's cancer was quite advanced and spread quickly. Jodi saw in Jenny and Joanne a strength of character and asked them to care palliatively for Margaret at home, while she would make house calls. This has been Jenny and Jo's greatest gift in life, caring for their mother at home for 8 weeks (Jenny was still having her chemo at this time) until Margaret succumbed to her cancer on 28 April 1999 (her wedding anniversary).

Jenny's breast cancer spread to her lungs and in late 1999 scans revealed 10 tumors. A hormone therapy treatment started. Jenny and Jo traveled to visit Suscila in Alice Springs and visited Uluru for the Millennium. Jenny would recall later that she had an amazing experience lying in the red desert sand at the foot of Uluru.

Shortly after her return from Uluru we became engaged and we set about organizing our wedding in just 10 weeks. The big day being the 30th April 2000. What a day. We sang “Song of Joy”. We exchanged vows and rings and then kissed as Husband and Wife. At the reception we made toasts, spoke and danced the night away. A rainbow theme being the unifying element with rainbow inspired flowers, ribbons, cake, speeches and songs. We honeymooned on Lord Howe and shortly after our return Jenny retired from work to pursue her passions (on Jodi's suggestion).

At the Sydney Olympics later that year we must have held the record for the most sessions attended - handball becoming our favourite. We had many fond and inspiring memories from the whole event.

At that time, just over 9 years ago, we had no idea how long we would have together. This did not stop us and we tried to live a normal life with goals set for six months at a time. Holidays were planned and taken - a trip to the Cook Islands to visit Susila over Xmas 2000, a 4 week trip to North West Australia in May 2001 and a return to Lord Howe in Oct 2001 so Joanne and my Mother could share the experience.

Another constant was our annual trip to Mt Kosciusko for a benchmarking 22km walk around the Main Range. This year was her hardest effort – but she did it. Maybe it was a sign of things to come.

In late 2000 I bought a small digital camera to document our travels and lives. I did not know how much time we would have share and the camera gave me some comfort that I could capture our memories.

Jenny's cancer was ever persistent and there was always something going on - radiation, more chemo, hormone injections or tablets and numerous operations - we could watch “House” and could easily relate to the medical terms.

Through one of her chemo treatments, Jenny found a Dragons Abreast flyer at the hospital. This would be start of the biggest change in our lives. Jenny and Joanne took to paddling like "ducks to water" and I found myself photographing them and the dragon boats that they trained and raced. It gave them opportunities to travel wide and far. Our holidays were now planned around Dragon Boat regattas locally and internationally.

Jo would make the NSW and Australian Team to Poland in 2003. Jenny was held back by a course of chemo and numerous trips to the hospital. She still remained involved by videoing the teams at time trials at Penrith.

In 2004 she would make the NSW Team and compete for her country in the World Championships in Shanghai. There could not have been a prouder person when Joanne's Premier Mixed Team won a bronze medal in the 500m race.

During the 2004 Shanghai campaign Jenny’s journey was captured by an Australian Story episode titled "In the Pink". She was nervous participant and a little uncertain about how it would be scripted and received. We all nervously awaited its airing on that June long weekend Monday - unaware as to its content. The episode captured the essence of the Dragons Abreast Movement in Australia, showing all sides to cancer and it's impact - positive and negative.

The episode would popularize Dragons Abreast Australia beyond it's creators wildest dreams. Clubs quickly popped up everywhere across the country and continue to do so. Meanwhile, Jenny and Joanne would become the most well known (yet most humble) paddlers in Australia.

Others today have told of Jenny's inspiring feats on the water and there is no need for me to repeat them. She just loved to paddle and found great comfort amongst her paddling colleagues. It provided a sense of normality to her life and she just seem to fit in, even with compression sleeve on her right arm or the missing hair on her head which was always discreetly hidden by a colourful selection of bandana's.

Jenny empowered many people (with and without) cancer to pursue their dreams. She will live on through Joanne and I and no doubt many others from her inspiring journey. Thinking of Jenny will help influence our decisions and motivate us to achieve our dreams and to decide what is right.

I will miss hearing you breath as you slept. I will miss calling out “I love you” as I leave for work each day. Whistling at the front door when I got home and hearing you whistle back. You were the most amazing thing to happen in my life I am having trouble comprehending the way forward. You provided me with love and gave me hope and life purpose. I would always say to Jenny “I am the lucky one”.

A couple of quotes from her regular talks and Australian Story follow and I think there is something there to inspire us all. No matter the circumstance.

“Cancer is something that people do not expect to happen to them and no matter who is diagnosed, and at whatever time in their life, it is a shock which has huge ramifications for not only the person involved but also their family and friends. It takes a lot of adjustment to get used to.”

“I feel I am so lucky and have a wonderful life. I have had some great opportunities through breast cancer to meet some very inspiring people. Geoff and Jo have been a constant source of support for me. Breast cancer has totally changed my life but for the best.”

“I don't understand how things work out, and why things work out the way they do. I feel like I've been lucky. I don't understand how cancer works, I don't know why I've been blessed the way I have been.”

“It's just in the lap of the gods.”

Enjoy your new “Island Home” and those that surround you [there]. You know that “We’ll be There” and we know that “You’ll be There”.

As we said to each other before we nodded off each night .. Jenny:

“Good Night, God Bless, I Love You.”

"That is my life story up until now."